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compulsive liar or just manipulative

My oldest daughter is 32. Since she was 14 or 15, she has either treated me as though I was the devil incarnate or the mom of the year. Nothing in the middle. She's been in the military and has a college degree. She has also been married twice and has a long string of boyfriends. She seems genuinely afraid to be on her own and take care of herself and be an adult. She is a "damsel in distress" and tells increasingly bizarre stories about her childhood and young adult years.

Her latest story is I paraded men in and out of her life as a child. She actually said to her brother "every time I turned around, we had a different Dad" He was shocked at this blatant lie and asked her why she would say such a thing. She evidently has convinced herself this is true and she tells everyone this story. Just for the record, I divorced her biological father when she was 7, dated my current husband since she was 9 and have been married to him since she was 11. He did not spend the night at our house until we were married.

I've tried to get her to talk to a professional for years. She did see someone briefly, but told him the lies she tells everyone else, adding that she'd been beaten and raped in bootcamp.

ANY advice is welcome.
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replied December 6th, 2010
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Hi cmyk and welcome to ehealth: You can't change her as she believes what she believes...The same goes for the Professionals that she sees...Sometimes a person like this can be so convincing that anyone and everyone belives them...I have often referred to the person I know who is like this as Dr. Jeckyl and Mr. Hyde...(only it is a female)....What can you do?...Live your own life...You aren't gonna change, what you aren't gonna change...I send you my best wishes....

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