Medical Questions > Relationships > Relationships and Marriage Forum

Boyfriend and Ex girlfriends sister

ok so..i'm going to try and make this short...my boyfriend and i went through some trust issues this time last year bc of some inappropriate text msgs between him and another girl at his work..nothing ever happened we got through it whatever...that was a year ago

things have been really really good lately we've been together 2 1/2 years now and he recently moved into a new place and gave me spare keys which i thought was a big deal that i can just come and go you know..its nice...and he wants me to move in but..my rents would kill me and i'm not big on doing that and i feel like thats a step for marriage anyway

ANYWAY...i've gotten much better with trusting him and what not but today he fell asleep early at his place and i went to charge his phone and saw a msg from "j" which usually i didn't question bc that was his old roomies nickname and i just figured that was what the contact name was...but i saw his old roomies name on his contact list so i started to wonder who "j" was...well i texted from my phone and i find out its his ex girlfriends sister...which i just think is really weird...there were no outbox msgs from him to her because he clearly deleted them the only msg i saw was the one that was msged before i plugged in his phone...so..does anyone else think its weird that my boyfriend is texting his ex gf's sister...(he hates his ex by the way bc she cheated on him)...bc i just think its REALLY weird..bc they were never good friends or anything..and as long as we've dated i've never known them to be friends or talk..so its just random that a)he would lie about who the number was and b) its weird that they're texting each other period..i mean..i dont keep up with my ex's siblings....

am i over reacting? feedback please i'm just wondering WHY he would be msging her..its not like he's trying to keep up with his ex bc he cant stand her...i'm so confused and not sure how to bring it up bc i'm sure he'll be upset i looked at his phone
Did you find this post helpful?
|

replied August 27th, 2008
over reacting?
i don't know... yes something seems to be cooking in your story but the point is... he is not texting bc... he is texting the sister. Maybe they had a good relationship before and probably he just doesnt want you to know because that girl is connected to his ex. maybe he is thinking that you might over react. If you are planning to confront him of that matter i guess it's best not. I mean people especially men doesnt want to be snooped around... would you?? Those things are private... has your bf ever cheated on you? do you have any basis that he is? your making your own ghost! I know women instinct but sometimes it also fails us. Relax... there are things that needed just to be kept to yourself. I've been there... it was nasty, it turned out that she was just asking for help to my ex and I personally confirmed it. Once your guy knew that you doubt him... he will doubt your loyalty too.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 30th, 2008
Extremely eHealthy
we talked about it he knows I was mostly upset bc of the fact that he had lied to me about WHO it was for so long...there is absolutely nothing they have in common besides his ex and all it is is small talk..so i told him I didn't like the fact he was chatting it up with his exs sister and that I'd prefer he delete her since they were never close friends anyway..he was more or less texting her just bc he was bored...no he has never cheated on me, but he has crossed the line as far as texting goes..and he knows it...we nearly broke up because of the issue we had when we first started dating...and that is why i flip out about the phone thing..i dont care to say what the texts were BUT..i will say that for us to be in a commited relationship for a year that they were inappropraite to be sending to another female and thinking about it now gets me fired up...anyway..as i said we talked about things for a while, he knows he should have never lied to begin with he was just afraid I would over react...anyway..situation solved..number deleted...i guess I was just wondering WHY they were talking...and he said he was just bored and was asking about school and what not so..whatever, like i said number is gone i'll just drop it and leave it alone....
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 30th, 2008
good for you... and don't open the subject ever again.... im glad you were able to sort things out ^^
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied August 31st, 2008
Extremely eHealthy
yep hopefully he's learned his lesson about lying...bc i always find things out Smile ...boys will be boys i guess
|
Did you find this post helpful?