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Since the death of my mom (who was my only family) I've become reclusive I don't see anyone talk to anyone I also am bipolar, I don't drink or take drugs I've been alone at my home for 2 years and my life is so miserable I've just let go and I'm waiting to die, I don't trust anyone I've not been able to grieve my loss or share my feelings my head is full of agony and desolation, I have no friends because I've pushed them all away. Now being alone is unbearable and I can't do anything about it.
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First Helper djohnba
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replied January 6th, 2014
Please take care of yourself
Please get some help. You may find it helpful to talk to someone (a psychiatrist, psychologist, or therapist). You don't have to live like this and be unhappy. I pray that you allow yourself to get some help because things can get better. My condolences on the loss of your mother. Please take care of yourself.
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replied January 15th, 2014
Maybe try and grow a support system, through making friends on here, anywhere you can. You need a support system, it is essential. Are you on medication or seeing a therapist currently?
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replied October 24th, 2014
Do me a favor please. Get a Bible and make yourself read it. Start with about 15 min. a day but go at least 1 month. Please. I am not preaching just telling you that I promise you will change and feel joy you have never felt before.
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replied November 6th, 2014
First of all, I'm sorry for your loss. I have also lost (a boyfriend), and didn't allow myself to grieve, because I was "busy" with psycho-dynamic therapy, and felt my plate was full already with the other stuff I was working through. I think this made things a lot worse in the long run.
Back then I didn't know I was bipolar. I would get a new diagnoses almost every month: PTSD, Schizoid Personality Disorder, Unspecified Personality Disorder, Unipolar Disorder etc, until I just accepted, that I wasn't normal, and leaved it at that. I began burying myself in work. When I wasn't working I buried myself in my bed under a blanket, because that was what my energy level allowed. This went on for seven years, until I suffered a mental breakdown two years ago. By then I had four friends left. Two of them gave up on me when the breakdown was followed by deep depression.
This summer, I began experiencing fluctuations between mixed episodes and hypo-mania, and one more friend went away. I'm on meds now (but not stabil), and finding it difficult to keep the relationship going with my last remaining friend. We talk about once a month now.
I think the only way to get friends again, is to put yourself out there. Perhaps you could find a support group for people with mental disorders, or look up old friends on Facebook, and see if you can reconnect?
All the best to you. I hope you get some friends back in your life!
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