Medical Questions > Mental Health > Depression Forum

Alone, Not Understood, Just Need Someone I can Relate to.

I am 19 years old but I act alot older. I am one of six children and come from a single parent family. I should be enjoying life, but i can never seem to be truely happy. I have my moments where i get really hyper and happy but that doesnt last for long, I will then drop into depression or get really angry for no reason.

People cannot understand me at all and they find it hard to cope with me. I have started to see a psychologist but they just want to try and diagnose you with something. All i want is to find someone who feels the same as me, that would make me feel less alone.

I have no reason to feel the way i do, i have had a normal (kind of normal) upbringing, nothing to serious has happned in my life but still i am messed up like this? It makes me feel selfish. How dare i feel like this when people have gone through so much worse then i have. it doesnt seem right. I found out as a young teenager that my father wasnt my biological dad. His wife then made him lose contact with me. So i tried to track down my biological dad and he didnt want anything to do with me. This made me feel so unwanted, and now i just have this need to be wanted all the time and neeed reasurring all the time that soemone does love me and want me.

I have no self esteem what so ever, which i feel is a big part of this.I have been with my partner for over a year, I loved him so much, but he cannot cope with my mood swings. I cannot believve i can make someone feel like this. We are now on the verge of splitting up. After i had a complete mental breakdown infront of him. So now my heart is also breaking. In a relationship i am a nightmare, i get so paranoid that he will cheat on me becuase i feel that i am not good enough for anyone. so i have basically destroyed my own relationship. Like i always seem to do.

I just want to find sommeone who feels the same as me, who understands how i feel, so we can talk. I have never met anyone in my life who is similar to me in any way. I just want to share my life with someone, i dont want to be on my own. Yes i have lots of friends but none of them care about me and they are not true friends how is it so hard to find a true friend who cares? I care about everyone, even if i dont no them and i would do anything for anyone but noone every seems to return that to me. I dont get anything back. I am such a caring, loving kind person, i put myself out there and just get hurt. Would anyone appreciate this me friendship?
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replied October 24th, 2010
Hi there, though we are complete stranger to each other, but i seem to understand what's in your mind. I truly understand what u feel. I feel the same. quite often. I know I am loved, yet I feel so miserable of my life, my thoughts, my bf as well as my frens. I have quite a lot of frens. that's true. but when i m feeling down n depressed, that's the time i realized i have no one to turn to. i don know who to talk to. so i always keep it to myself. true frens are hard to find. but believe me, thr's always someone out there for u. try look at the bright side of life. I am depressed but at least i m trying my best to feel good. dear fren, i care for u. coz we are ppl of the same kind. I throw hearts out at ppl, but sometimes they jz neglect or ignore. but nvm, jz be yourself. i believe u r such a caring and loving person. i pray for u. may your life be blessed. don be knocked down by little unhappiness. We are here for u. Smile
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