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abusive relationship its too long being tortured now...

hi, i will just take few mints,
me and my ex had a relation of 3 years, he was good to me only on the very first week and afterwards, he started troubling me so much that i even went on the verge of going insane, he used to trouble me, evrytime i was happy on my bday, or any xyz occasion he finds a way to trouble me, but i used to love him and i thought that i had made commitments i should fulfill them at any case.. i patiently took this relation and dragged this trouble to 3 loong years!! he not only spoiled my happiness but took away all my frnds, soon my graduation ended, and i entered into msc,he also took admisn into it, then i got to knw that he had multiple affairs and i tolerated that looking at the past 3 years, i thought i should forgive him, which i did, but his constant torture made me realize that i could not struggle this for whole of my life, then i thought i should have done this quite early, i asked him for breakup, and this is when the real problem started, he started calling at all of my parents number started torturing them, the only few friends who were with me started keeping away from me, he started coming to college and warned me that he'll suicide or will show everyone of my "intimated picture" which do not exist and he himself has created them..!! he just made my days worse and worse,, i was alone, it told my parents all of it, about how much i cared for this ugly looking guy and how much freak i was..they supported me for much time, but now they too are tired of his nuisance and my parents are fearful of police and could not took up any fir or some police case.. moreover, in staring he told me his name is "sahil chaoudhary" and after 1.5 years, he hold me his true name is "zunaid khan", i was a dumb dumb dumbest of all grls, i should have understood that time that if he could tell me his basic identity after so long how can he be the right one.!!
and now when i am in msc, i had a frnd whom i fell in love with, he was the only frnd of mine who supported me even when my oldest frnd had stopped contacting with me, he loved me alot and he don't even let me cry and induce courage in me to face this situation, and to be true, i had never ever been loved so much, and now, its been 2 months we are together, now my ex came to know abt us, and he again started abusing me and calling torturing my parents and even warned me to show those "fake" picture at my home, i am even scared that he is so so cruel and violent that he can even throw acid, i fear going to my colg,
now, at this point i don't know what to do, i had never in my lifetime harmed anyone, i had never never done bad to anyone, i am very religious type of girl, and now i am unable to worship my lord or go to satsang, because i feel strange that what wrong i had done that i am receiving so evil now, sometimes i do not want to worship a bit, my faith in god is loosing..
i was college topper at grad level and now i manage to get few marks in exam in msc, i could not concentrate, he is all together spoiling my life, and now i wish not to wake next morning...
please help how to stand this situation and what to do so that he may go out of my life its too long being tortured now...
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replied November 18th, 2012
Extremely eHealthy
Hello Kushi,

I am sorry for the trouble such a bad man is causing you.
He is a bully and is probably suffering from a psychosis.

It is easy for someone who is not you to say but you must know much of your terror is in your imagination?
He has planted a seed and your mind has caused it to grow.
If you told him to carry out his threats it is very unlikely he actually would because that would mean a disgrace for his family and probably a prison term for him...
The reality of your situation is not as bad as your imagination and the best way to deal with a bully is to call his bluff!
There is a small chance that he would assault you and a much smaller chance he could cause permanent harm to you but it really is a small chance. I think you should ask yourself if it is worth living in fear and tolerating such abuse in order to avoid the small chance such a bully will carry out his threats?

I strongly suggest you write to the head of the college and tell everything and ask for help. I feel you should do the same to the Pastor or Vicar of your church.
I feel you should do the same and write to the local police chief - making such threats and misusing the telephone system and postal service in order to make threats is against the Law throughout Europe and probably in other places too.
Making threats of physical harm is also against the Law.

I think you should write to this madman and tell him you are finished with him and desire to be untroubled by him further.
Take reasonable precautions for your safety but go on with your life with your new protector.

Both your parents will have seen naked bodies before. Such manufactured pictures cannot harm or shock anyone other than the shock caused by the bad manners of the sender.

Good luck!
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