|I'm a 15 year old normal kid and I really can't stand my own life. I don't want to go into too much detail because I'm sure people don't want to read pages and pages but I hate myself simply because I'm skinny. At my age a big part of life is enjoying being young, having girlfriends, going to parties with mates etc. But I cannot enjoy that because I hate that I'm skinny. My parents would just say to ignore it and they say that nobody even notices but they do, at school we are forced to play Rugby and I literally despise it because everyone else is just ten times bigger and stronger than me and I feel embarrassed and I just want it to end. I have had girls comment that my arms are thin and I haven't actually had a girlfriend or anything whilst at secondary school, and I can tell that it is because I'm not the big, hench bad boy of the class. I have also been playing football at a club since I was 8, the people who play in my team now are quite popular in my year group. I have talked to people about the fact that I play football and they've seemed surprised, I then ask why and they say that I don't look like the sort of person who does sports, and again, I can tell because they think I'm skinny and unsportslike. I also try and keep up with fashion and things, but I get very self conscious about wearing shorts because of my legs. I wore three quarter lengths to school once on a non-uniform day and I had people laughing behind my back as I walked along and I heard one of them mention legs. I'm not super skinny down to bone, but I'm definitely not chubby or really muscley in any way, but I just feel so embarrassed and it effects my personality and social life especially with girls, I am scared to flirt with a girl or talk because I just see myself in their eyes as some skinny freak.
Going back to sports again, I am in division one next season (the top group) and it's going to be ten times more physical. I am just worrying about it because I feel I let the team down because I'm not as tough as them. At school in rugby people also laugh and say "pass the ball to Toby, he'll smash through them" and I just have to laugh and go with the joke every time. But on top of all that, I've got my GCSE's and loads of school work and my life is just full of pressure, stress and depression. There are loads of other things I hate too, but this post would go on for ages if I said it all.
Anyway, thanks for reading.