jmr, I relate and I understand the apparently logical option of death.
When the balance between one's desire to end the pain vs your family and friend's desire to see you around becomes a nagging question, it becomes very difficult. I questioned this for 3 years, wondering which was more selfish : my desire for death, or my family's wish to not see me die.
It took a very long time to find the cause of my pain and I suspect it may be yours as well. Mine is from clenching my jaw at night, from stress (and this starts a feedback loop, a vicious circle). It took way too long to figure this out, but maybe I can help you with this.
Go get your masseter (jaw muscle) looked at NOW! This could be a real issue, and it seems from what I'm reading is a very major cause of TMJ issues. When stressed and unable to relax at night it can cause very serious symptoms, some of which aren't at all obvious. I thought mine were ear issues. Damage to my ear, damage to my eustachian tube. And so I went to ENT doctors at Kaiser, wasting my time with arrogant MD's who looked in my ear, saw nothing, and told me nothing's wrong!
This got out of hand and I was insulted by doctors, essentially told I was crazy.
One called me one morning to tell me to "Trust my doctors" and that there's "nothing wrong" if they don't see anything.
They're dead wrong. And now after finding a cause to my pain, and a real treatment, after dealing with short-sighted fools, I am angry.
You want to know how you might be able to treat it yourself? Start massaging your masseter from inside and out. I mean jam your fingers into it from both sides, shove your thumb in your mouth and rub in circles 'til it's sore. This is what worked for me. You should also get a double (BOTH upper and lower!) bite plate/splint made. A good orthodontist can do this but it'll run several hundred dollars without coverage.
I had a single upper made last year and it didn't do a damn thing. Now I think I know why. A single doesn't immobilize the jaw and stop the clenching. Sure it's fine for grinding motion since it lets your jaw slide around smoothly, but nothing else.
I'm getting my double plate fitted later this month, in the meantime I massage it and rub Capzacin (the pepper extract stuff) in my cheek. This really helps and I won't kid you it will burn like hell but it will help with the pain. Capsaicin interferes with muscular pain like nothing else. Don't waste your time with Vicodin or the other
heavy duty opiates : they seem to be worthless for muscle pain and are dangerous. Capsaicin's pretty safe but very potent, and never use it with heat and keep the heavy-duty roll on stuff (0.125% is heavy duty!) out of your mouth. If you use it with a heating pad it can penetrate too far and cause damage. I'm pretty sure peppers are ok to chew on for this though and I've been sucking on red pepper flakes in my left cheek (it's all my left side) and it DOES help!
paulybruskin wrote :
>How dare you insinuate that this debilitating pain can be cured through a higher power.
Indeed. Believer25, speak nothing more of things you do not understand. Your stink of arrogance is offensive. No one and nothing understands the nature of chronic pain until it is experienced! For the rest of the "he's a whiner" camp I have a suggestion...
Go buy a geologist's rock hammer.
Then smash your jaw with it. Be sure to shatter your jaw.
Then imagine the pain never goes away.
This is much what TMJ feels like.
