I messed up bigtime with my girlfriend of 2.5yrs. We had a heated argument and I said things I should never have said... She is an amazing woman with 2 kids, I love them all as if its my family... but I let things I was unhappy about bottle up because I did not want to upset her. she is very head strong, so I tend to let things slide to the point of not talking about the basic stuff. So during the misunderstanding I errupted and ended saying "I love you so much, do you think just because you have kids from different fathers I think you are a promiscuous person?... not to me you are not"... she said for me to even mention that word it meant I was thinking it... How can I call that or think it... I tried to tell her that is not the spirit in which it was said... Also told in a letter i gave to her the next day that if we don't talk and things don't change I want out now...

3 weeks later I realised my mistakes... of trying to initiate a communication in such anger. Now she says she obliges to my request of ending our relatioship and she agrees to end because I asked so strongly without regard for her input or love. But she loves and said she did not want this to end but I have disrespected her too much to keep us going. If we end up together it will happen by fate but at the moment she does not want try... she just wants time out and space.

Its scary... if I give her time out and space I might loose her for good. If I don't I might irritate her off. I love her to bits and now I kinda buy her flowers every second day... I realised what i did and the way I communicated was wrong. This woman has been good to/for me... we have been good to each other but we lost out on communicating for 4 months and we errupted.

Help, I must keep her for good... evenif I have to fight for her for months. She is worth the pain.