i have been with my bf for nerli 3 years now all was at the begining we loved each other like mad but lately over the past year or so he has been shouting at me for no reason swearing etc putting me down and then saying he is sorry and that i is because he has had a bad past growing up without a father etc.. i used to stay quiet but then started to fight back and soon it got physical and now he puts me down all the time he has started to hit me now a few times i just dont know wether he will change if this is a rough patch or what, how can he do this to me i thought he loves me, he controls everything i do now he is just not the same person anymore ;(
omg....its rough...well who can say that he will change or not,, God knows better...but i think that ur extra care can change him...just get him some flowers, whn he gets back home make him his fav food, spend some time outside, wear his fav dress...these are little things, but i guess they will aid in healing the crack in ur relationship...m not married so i dont knw much...but my sympathies are with u....ill surely pray 4 u...may God bless u..
no it is not true that your extra care can change him. I have been verbally abused by my husband for almost 12 years and you can not love him enough to make him better. In the end, you will be wishing that you had loved yourself enough to see how bad the situation is and will wish that you had left long ago. Physical abuse is dangerous and you need to get out. Let him go to counseling on his own, but by no means subject yourself to any kind of abuse. You are worth so much more than you think and you do not deserve it.
I really hope that since May you have left him. If someone loves you they would not hit you. The fact that you are so kind as to still love him means that you are a great person who will get from life as much as you give it. Leave now and you will find love again. He needs help and if he really loves you, he will get help on his own and you will find out at some point in your life, in the distant future, whether he has changed or not. If he can change, he will of course regret what he has done and contact you after doing the healing he needs to do on his own. Without you paying the price. Please leave him. If not for yourself, imagine if you had a daughter or a sister who was in the situation, what would you tell her to do?