In general, I would say that men are slightly more aggressive but you can find plenty of exceptions to the rule.
It is very important to wash your genitals before oral sex or sex of any kind.
I guess what is sexy to women varies depending on who you ask. Personally, unlike many women, I like a hairy chest. I feel like I'm with a prepubescent boy if if the guy has no chest hair/ has shaved his chest hair. lol I love bellies too. Anything smaller than a beer belly is fine with me. I love to nibble on them and tease belly buttons with my tongue. Also, a man whose legs look great in shorts always gets my attention!