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Where did my sexual desire go?

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Up until about 2 years ago I loved sex, wanted to have sex all the time. But I'm trying to figure out where it went. I have no desire to have sex, if i do have sex it doesnt feel good, and i try to avoid it. I am only 27 my boyfriend is 39. I just can't get aroused. Even tried watching porn or masturbating its just not there. Iv had test done everything fine. Me and my bf have had some major issues sexually where he never wants it when i wanted to do anything and frankly he just sucks in bed for the most part. I never get oral sex or anything special and he just likes to lay there and me do everything...Hes overweight, i am too but hes about 264 and im 190. Im honestly thinking its lack of intrest? I never feel attractive anymore, im just so ugh with it, the problem is I do love him and we are comitted. I just dont know what to do. Iv tried talking to him and it gets me no where, he thinks im mean if im being honest about whats going on so iv learned to just shut up.
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replied September 13th, 2011
Hi,
Welcome to ehealthforum,
The symptoms that you describe could be a result of monotonous relationship itself. You can consider going ahead with getting couple therapy sessions done for both of you to help with identifying the problems and finding solutions. Sex should be mutual and pleasurable to both, and if it is not, then it is time to look for underlying issues and resolving them at the earliest. Discuss with your gynecologist about getting the couple therapy prescribed and go ahead as instructed.
Take care.



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