I am totally fed up with life, am always feel unhappy and lonely. I was not always like this. I had my own aim of life, and was very serious for that. Everything was normal up to my schooling, but things changes very sharp since then. I am not from a very rich family, due to which my parents had to take loan from my relatives, because I was a bright student and they want that I should complete my study. But before helping us they pressurize a lot to me as well as my parents. After that start preparing for the competitive exam an by luck secure good marks, and taken admission in a college, but after few months later came to know that, our college cheated us, they had shifted us in to new branch of it, with no market value. At that point I was in a condition that neither i can come back or move forward.
Anyhow I start preparing through self study, but during this face of time, come in contact with a boy. I never know when we fall in love.... but at the end of my college time came to know that this guy is not right, he is a flirt. That was the shocking moment of my life, it looks like that there left nothing in the life.
But after that my life finished, because he was the first person to whom I believed. Nothing was left, remain in the memory of that person, I tried a lot to forget that person, but didn't. Today I am so much depressed that I started forgetting things, my memory is becoming weak day by day. All the time feel frustrated, depressed, and nothing make me feel happy. Start cursing my life, along with also have tension of my parents who believe me alot, and they are thinking that I will fulfill their dreams. I am feeling very lonely and alone. And not being able to discuss with my friends, because they are busy in their life. It looks like that they don't have time to listen to me.
Now the situation is that am start scaring talking to unknown person, or sharing my feeling with any one.
Oh God I really don't know what I am doing with my life.
I want to live life for my parents, but I am not doing so. Why it is so hard to forget someone, why??
Every day I make plan so that I will not recall him, but in every second of my life found his memory. that make my life terrible to live.....I am spoiling my life, every day at night keep on crying to find the solution to my problem, but not being able to do so...
What should I will do with my life....