We have been together for 3 years... this is what happened...

okay, to make this short as to what is going on, I have a girlfriend named Ceciley. We have been great and in real love for 3 years, She has just started college and I have told her all about what happens when you go to college alone and how college people get stupid because there alone and think they can do anything they want... however this isnt true. If you are taught to grow up responsibly and learn manners, and not to break the laws, or cheat, or steal, it was taught to you for a reason right? I mean I told her what would happen when she went off to commerce. Everything I told her would happen and to stay away from, she is now involved in.... Sorority, the drinking alchahol which she has never done before, the being tempted easily and in a heartbeat. Everything that you wouldn't want your girlfriend to do while she is off at college... Talking to guys and starting to like them but not telling me about it.... So anyways this is basically what happened the first WEEK of college. Yesterday we got in an arguement over the phone as I tried explaining that she is better than that to be doing that kind of stuff like drinking and staying out late like she does and partying, and its not right, just all bad choices. So anyways I told her she needs to stop and she says she loves alchahol which made my heart drop instantly and made me feel horrible. I wasn't thinking to straight and told her that I wanted to break up and not talk to her anymore if she was going to be like that, so we did and hung up the phone. I called her back instantly and after she finally picked up I told her I was very sorry about what I said and that im just scared and dont want her doing that kind of stuff. She made it seem like we were back together but the next day I found out she missed 1st period class, again not being responsible, and she has cheated on me with some random college guy *made out with*... however she claims we were not together, however I believe it was an excuse but anyways she wont get back with me now. So I decided I would poor my heart out and write her an email. I did. Ill paste the email in this convo and you can tell me what you think... She is 18yr. old and I think she just isn't being smart or thinking about what she is doing before she does it... How can I help her!!! I love her so much... It scares me inside to think something could happen to her at anytime, and it could because she isnt making good choices, however I do understand its her choices to make... Also something you should know is that today she told me she told her parents about everything and that they were okay with it all... I knew that was bull crap... What sort of sick parents would be okay with there child/daughter going out and drinking underage, and staying out all night when they are paying for her to go get an education??? Anyways so I called her parents because she said if I called her parents they would say the same thing, so I called them after we got off and she was okay with it, so when her mom/dad answered and I talked to them, they were not okay with it. The mom seemed more okay with it then the dad, the dad was actually pretty upset and seemed to have questions to ask me back... I was happy to see he cared about what was going on... However I had already expected they knew about all this since she said she told them everything... The mom doesnt care much about ceciley if you ask me... She doesn't even care if her daughter is out drinking and that to me shows lack of responsibility and love for her. Ceciley often tells me stories about her mom so its not obvious why she doesn't seem to care.... If ceciley was my daughter I would make her pay for college and tell her im going to cut her off if she doesn't get focused and on track with college. It might have been wrong for me to call her parents, because she was pissed after she heard I called and told them everything. But I did it because I care for her on a level that is beyond earth. Really. Here is the email I sent her.... tell me what you think.....
Btw, she thinks the college experience is meeting new friends/drinking and partying... Also she stays out almost everynight until 2- 4am... and has missed classes from waking up late.... ok now read the email....

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Ceciley, look I know your probably just going to delete this message but listen, yesterday I made a choice to get upset over the phone and say this 1 thing I didn't mean, the second I called you back I was positive we were cleared up and not broken up. I can not navigate without you, your just like the ice beneath my skates... I can't do anything with out you. And im so emotionally attached to you that all I want is the best for both you and myself. I see things in a way I wish you could see. I don't know why I can see these things all the way I do, but I can. But. Babe, if my mom paid for me to go to commerce, you could be well assured that I would not blow that free ride off on missing 1 class or staying out late and drinking... It's not only wrong for that reason, but its wrong because those are bad choices to make anyways. Those are very bad choices and I want you too see it now so you can get yourself out of those situations while you can. I know what alchahol can do, ive seen what its done to people, and baby I dont want you to be like those people. My uncle Jessie, Uncle Matt, Uncle jerald, they started when they were young and never got away from it. They still say till this day that its not bad to drink or do drugs and that they are okay. But they aren't. Jerald has wasted almost 32 years on his life on drugs and alchahol. He will never be normal even if he quit. There is just no way. But the point comes down too, doesn't it feel good in the pit of your heart to know that you have the ability to say I resisted drugs and alchahol and didnt become involved in that stuff or let it take over me?
Ceciley, I love you so much, when you told me you kissed some other guy I crashed the second we got off the phone to find that 2 teachers walked by and told me its okay and helped me up. I can't manage without you. What you need to know is that this transition between seeing each other everyday and you now being away is tuff, but you aren't making this easy for me one bit. I mean you started drinking the first week!! That was so hard for me. I still wasn't prepared for the love of my life to be away from me. All I want for us is to be together happy. I know we can live a great life and love each other beyond extremes and make the best choices to be made. I have gotten to know everything about you in the last 3 years and I know you are so much better than that. I know you can keep yourself from being the teacher that is a drinker or the mother of children that influences them with beer... Really Ceciley, you can think that im just saying this too get you back but im not, even as much as I do want to be with you more than I want anything in the world. I just want to know that I havn't failed you as a boyfriend because I really do try to make you happy and everything beyond baby, I try. I only want the best, and by saying that I want you to know that I want you to think about everyone in your life that matters to you before you do anything such as drinking or kissing another guy, and ask yourself, is this right? Does this feel right in my heart? I hope when you kissed him you were thinking about the guy back home who loves you and thinks of nothing except you.. Not some guy that just came along and took you 10 minutes after we had a phone fight...
Since it is apparent that you will never be getting back with me again, I want you to think one last time, are you ready and willing to let me go and know you may never be with me again? Or would you rather hold onto me as I have with you and hold you close to me when you missed me and I missed you and loved me while I loved you? I know our love is real. Because I can always feel love running through me when im with you, and the second we are apart you can feel the pain. I know this love is real because I can not get it from anyother girl im around except you. And I believe ive done enough to find that out myself. I can not sit around and let you drink and play games with other guys and wait on you to tell me whether or not you are wanting to be with me inside or not. Its not fair for me. You have to let go of everything we did to each other in the past babe. We have to worry about now. It takes effort to make things like this work. Im willing to put forth that effort. I know the real you is inside Ceciley. That girl who want's to be a teacher, and have kids and settle down and relax with the man that loves you. I LOVE YOU. So much. I know you cant see it, but thats only because a giant shade has been pulled down over your eyes. You see me as the grinch because you have friends now that you can be with a take over me. You have non stop activites availible to you that can you keep you busy without me. Can you honestly say that if we never spoke again you would be okay with that? What is going to happen when Trent makes his move with you then leaves? Im not going to blabber on and on but basically from what your dad and mom have told me, they sent you to college to get an education most kids cant have and aren't fortunate enough to get these days, and they definatly didnt send you up there to party. They told me they "DID NOT" approve of you drinking even though it is your choice, and if it isnt put to an end, they would cut off from paying for your college if they had too. So you tell me what they said they were okay with? You tell me who's parents would ever like to hear or know that their daughter is underage off at college drinking and staying up all night. That is not right and never will be. I have called them to find out if they were honestly okay with you doing all that like you said because I care, and I was honestly about to attack your parents if they weren't adult enough to take responsibility for their daughter that they are supposed to love and protect, and keep out of those situations, however, they were not okay with 1 thing I had to tell them, at all. I was in no way trying to rat you out. I just wanted to see if you were telling the truth and according to what they told me, you lied to me again. This isn't a game. I care and want the best for you. If you don't make the right choices then it is going to kill me. I can't deal with thinking for 1 second that you could get hurt or killed like everyone else that gets killed or injured from it like you hear about EVERYDAY. If you knew God didn't approve and want you doing it, why would you do it? I thought that learning from the mistakes we made in our relationship we were setting goals, or bounderies, and rules as to know as to what not to lean towards and be tempted by.... Ceciley I know your not a drinker or a little flirt around talker because ive been through all that with you. I know that you only set your mind on one guy at a time and stick with it until you have a reason to get out. Don't tell me your not dating him or going to be dating someone because yall went out the other night. And I have a hard time believing all yall did was 1 kiss. I want to know. What did you think when you touched the edges of your lips against his? I honestly can't believe you would do that because if we had just broke up I would hope you would see there was some possibility of us getting back together. You dont have to impress me or try to fit in. We love you the way you are. And who you are is a nice, unshy, happy person that loves attention, and is very funny if I say so myself, and loves to show love and caring feelings to everyone. You also love kids. You can get nervous, also stressed but I believe you are the most inspirational person ive ever known baby. I strive to live and be close to you based on how and what you are. You represent so much more than what you have been doing lately.
I don't care if you print this off and show the world because I think there is good in what I have to say to you. I believe there is chance and hope that you will get the bigger picture from this. I also believe college is so much more than partying and drinking, actually its not about that stuff at all. Its about getting things right and being ready and put into the real world and getting the chance to stand out to everyone around the world. You said you wanted to move to colorado, but parties, drinking, and such will not get you there. Only you can convince yourself that you are what it's going to take to get there. And hopefully, since we aren't together, as a friend I hope you take my advise and follow it coming from the heart. This is probably going to be the last thing you ever hear or read from me... I doubt you want to talk anymore... I hope you can resist all temptation and say yes or no for the right reasons. When I go out now, I think about what im doing and I think about everyone I care about and how it would effect them before I do anything so that I can say, I thought it over and made the right choice. Im also going to church. Don't comment that. It is true. I have been for weeks now. I feel God is telling me something by making all this happen. I don't know why else I would ever type something like this up to try to help 1 person out of the whole world out sooo much. I believe he want's to show me that anything is possible or somethings are ment to be, I dont know but I do know that I would never just come on here and type all this up unless we were both on here and talking to eachother already... Something told me to get on here so thats what im doing.
I wanted to be the most loving man in your life and the most important, but its not fair for me to ask that of you. I honestly hate to see you put all your friends before me. Im not saying I hate to hear that your going to hang out with them all the time, I just like you and me time and also some private phone time where you and I can honestly just talk. I told you that back when you were on that medicine and calling me every five minutes... Honestly, at the time it was a little funny, but after a while it got a bit dragging, I tried to explain that I wanted to talk to you everyday but more time in-between the calls... that way when we talked, we had more to talk about and more to explain about whats going on. I had no Idea it would effect you in that way. I hope you don't go off and talk crap about me either, I would never do that behind your back or about you period. You in the past have done that to me and made me look much worse than I am and to be honest it hurts... Im not a little girl but I have feelings inside I never thought I would have to tell about and explain to you but this is how I feel.
Lately ive felt more and more alone. The world is getting quiet as I check my phone every 5 minutes now to find a message or a missed call from you. Nothing. I can be man enough to tell you that I cry. I have cried over you before and I am now. Not because im a baby or a little girl, but because I guess the feelings that are fluxuating through and about all of this... I miss you and die to hear what I have heard, I very often feel you fell for all I have tried so hard to warn you about. I have often felt you do this to make me upset because you are doing all the things we have always talked about not doing. I don't know why I deserve this, but if you feel that its the right thing you should be doing then I cannot stop you. But I believe that your friends, if they are truely good friends, would keep you from drinking if they knew what kind of person you really are, they are seeing the college girl type of you, not the real you. I know the real you. Honestly who you are up there isnt who you are and you can tell whenever you compare between what you do up there, and what you do and act like down here and what you do with friends down here, and what you do with kids down here and what you try to prevent others from doing down here. You make a huge difference to everyone down here. We all love you for who you are. And the one place you go and act a way that you aren't, is up in commerce. You don't have to try and fit in with them if they are that good of friends... Like I told you I would love to meet them, we talked about it, and I may have not sounded happy because of the drinking inccident but I still wanted to meet them, and you said this thursday I could come down there and see you and meet them and now you say no. I don't know whats gotten into you. You have never been this way, and baby, You should know me enough to know that I RARELY ever ever ever get mad or upset without a good reason, well im getting upset and somewhat mad now.... I dont know if it matters now but im telling you everything. You have always listened to me in the past. And would never cut me off for one second, you would always listen to what I had to say and talk it over with me and now I dont get that respect or attention at all. Even when you call, all I get is 2 seconds and then you have to go. I know the other girls don't do that with their boyfriends...
Together or not together, please be happy and make the best choices you can. I don't want to go to sleep again fearing of what your doing the next night... I worry so much because I can't help but care about you. It's a natural thing for me to love and care for you whether you think its crap or not. It's true and deep down you know it. So stop saying out-loud thats bull sh** because its not and I know that's what your saying. We have had some of the best experiences to ever be shared in our lives together, we both had our first time together and felt what true love feels like! We also found out how bad some fights can get but in the end we both came to realize that we are only human and will run in to trouble sometimes and it's better just to talk about it and move on past the bad. We actually had some of the best times in our relationship that I know ive ever had in my life. Ive never experienced $ex before you, or the meaning of why we did such things like it. Our love drew us closer to it, not my d*** or your p****. It was a real love that drove us to it. I could feel that love the same way you could. It made it 1000x better. I know that if I was ever to get with someone else and have $ex, it could never be like it was with you and me. What we had was real love and was very very special. It still is. Im the kind of friend that will be here until death do us part. Seriously and im sorry thats all I could think of to describe... Im the kind of friend who will be here for you until death. I will be here in the good and bad, for better or worse, and want us to be happy, you are so much worth all the trouble baby, I garentee you that I would never go through this amount of trouble for ANYONE else. I could never see myself doing it. Im in love with you. I hope whatever has come accross us will be forgiven over time and you will accept me as a friend. If we ever get to the point of a bigger relationship once more. I hope we pursue it. Because the relationship we have had is the best thing ive ever had and you always told me how you felt about me all the time and I know somewhere inside your beautiful heart. Im still there somewhere. I know I have to mean the world to you somehow because my feelings have never tricked me and you have always told me that. I can tell when you are being serious and saying things you mean, and when your not. I truely love you, I know our love is real, but if you would rather go off and be with other guys and give away what is special to us. I hope you make the right decision by thinking about us first and if what you are doing is worth it or not... I want you too be 100% sure about this decision and make sure that these 2 weeks have honestly showed you something about us is horribly so bad like you said on the phone before you try to ask me to leave you alone and move on. Once I have moved on there is no going back and I want you to seriously think about that before you just read this and say... ummm ok yeah move on... Because it will be alot more complicated on you if you feel you made the wrong choice down the road. And yes, even though its your choice to make, I hope you will think it over very hard and for an amount of time by yourself to think, Is he really what I want to hold onto or do I want these other guys or something else? I have so much more I feel I should type but like I have said, I believe God only wanted 1 thing to stand out to you from this entire type-up. I wont hate you for whatever answer you choose or responses you make. I just love you so much I cry thinking your gone. You truely mean the most of everything to me and I love you.
Love sincerly,
CSW.
I love you so so much. More that I could ever describe. I cant tell you how hard it is to be away from you and how badly I miss seeing your beautiful face. Goodbye baby, I love you so much. I always will. You know that, its down deep in your heart. Goodbye Baby. I love you, forever like the day is long.
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-Forever like the day is long is a quote/inside thing we always had...

We are no longer talking to eachother or communicating in anyway. Im heartbroken to the extreme but in a way I want to just say, sorry for caring.
I am a Christian and want the best for her, I don't stalk her. But I did call her parents because I care, and ive known plenty of dumb people that go to the hosipital from alcahol poisoning because my buddy works for AMR in conneticut and he tells me about it all the time, She claims she doesnt get drunk, she just drinks but I think she is getting to the point where she might be getting close to getting drunk soon. I wouldn't doubt it since she now has something to drink about... I dont know what else to do but post it on here and see what people think... Im not too much in the mood for anything except knowing she is okay... the last thing she said to me was: Just go on and meet someone else, dont ever talk to me again, leave me alone... I know I should be better than this, and I have talked to my family and friends about it, and they all say its not my fault, that I should have just told her sorry for caring... I feel she still has my heart with her but she is around things that kills my heart, and it makes me feel alot like whatever that feels like.... please leave any sort of feedback... I am so out there and lost...