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watching my wife have sex with someone else? (Page 2)

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January 17th, 2009
ALL GOOD
I asked my wife to have sex with another man,we talked and fantasized about it for about 2 years until it happened it was great i loved every second of it we have met with a few other couples and single men and have had many fantasies come true and our realtionship couldn't be stronger
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replied January 17th, 2009
Experienced User
I'm impressed at the amount of guys...
Who love watching their wives have sex with other men. This must be an exilerating experience for the gals as well.

Can you shed some light on how they (the wives) feel about the sex in front of you?

Wendy
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replied July 5th, 2013
mine says it excites her knowing I'm there
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replied July 5th, 2013
mine says it excites her knowing I'm there
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replied February 10th, 2014
Call me and lets find out
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replied February 27th, 2009
Watching Wife with other Men
I also get extremely turned on at the thought of my wife with other men. I used to be very jealous but have mellowed during the course of our marriage. It is however just a fantasy for both of us and we use it frequently when making love. We love talking about what she would do and how she would do it. The nastier the better. In my fantasy I would love to see her taking on multiple men but they all must be well endowed. It really gets us off in the heat of the moment but for both of us, it's just a fantasy and neither of us would really want it to happen.
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replied March 1st, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
Re: I applaud you for being so open
furrytail wrote:
Past50,
I would have to say that I admire your openess towards your wife having sex and I also find her stance of doing it with other men pretty neat as well. I know that the opposite is kind of true as well. As a Massage Therapist I get many men who are sent out for a massage by their wifes so that they can get off by some elses hand.
I don't think you're weird, especially is she is enjoying it.

Wendy


...i send my guy to a masseuse to get a massage.. Shocked personally, i think its unprofessional to bring a sexual act into a simple relaxing massage... if i ever found out my bf was touched inappropriately I'd be furious...whats the difference between paying someone on the street and getting a "professional" to do it?...nothing in my opinion...maybe that was a bit harsh however, i just dont feel like its appropriate to be whacking a guy off when his wife/significant other/gf is paying your bills by sending him there and would probably not be ok with it..i for certain am not
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replied March 30th, 2009
Interested in same scenario
50,

I'm 26 and my girlfriend is 22. I've had a fantasy of watching or knowing my significant other having sex with someone else. My idea is that it would be purely sexual or at most a "friends with benefits" situation but she's not very receptive to the idea. However, consider the following:

1) She did have sex with someone else a few months ago when she thought our relationship was in a position to where we would break up. To be fair, I'll admit I wasn't giving her much time and attention at the time, and of course, if a woman's not getting attention at home she'll get it somewhere else.

2) She is planning on sleeping with someone (an ex boyfriend who lives out of town who will be in town during my trip) while I'm out of the country in a few weeks because due to many trying circumstances in our relationship right now she doesn't think our relationship will last past the summer (we're both college students).

Other than that, sometimes she'll give e some good "bed talk" about sleeping with someone else and we talk and get off that way, but still isn't receptive to the idea.

So, my questions:

1) Am I being taken for a fool? She has always said that she doesn't believe in sleeping with someone outside of our relationship.

2) Any pointers, tips, etc. to maybe get her more receptive to my fantasy, but without the crap of the "problems", etc. but to go through with the fantasy just out of lust/F.W.B.?
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replied April 6th, 2009
I to would love to get some advice on this topic. I was in the process of looking for a doctor in my area that specializes in this to talk to. I came across this non-judgmental thread and figured I would state my scenario.
I have developed an interest like this with my wife and she is not very responsive to the idea. I need to either work with her to get her interests up or need to work on myself not wanting this anymore.
My wife loves other women. I am cool if she plays around and sometime we go to stripper joints and have a good time when the kids are away. She gets lap dances and also like it when I participate at a light level with the other girl. This is mainly getting a lap dance and letting me touch the other girl while she kisses and stuff with her. This is all fun and I am for it.
The problem we have is that I also wish for her to be with other men. She really can not figure out why I want this and I probably am not explaining it very well, since this is also a little confusing to me. I think part of her issue is that she has fear of falling for another guy and also has no guy in mind to even consider doing this with. I also do not have anyone in mind. I just figured we could some day find someone who would be in the area, but not from the area if that makes sense. She has also stated that she thinks I may be gay and that is why I have those fantasies. I do not agree with this, since if that was the case I would be just think about men and not this.
I think one of my main reasons for this fetish is that I want to watch her in enjoyment. I get pleasure from watching her get pleasured. There are also some light dominance reasons I also think I am interested in this. I do not want her to humiliate me, but want her to control me in some way during this. Such as, I wan t her to give me permission afterwards to either have intercourse with her or tell me to just masturbate. I would not even mind if she every once and awhile would want it to be a 3some.
I know that some women may not be into these for the religious reasons and such. That however is not the case for my wife. We dated for a little while in high school many years back. She was wild back then and had sexual relationships with multiple men, sometimes at the same time. This was one of the causes for us breaking up then. However, we started dating again and got married years and years later. I would be cool though if she did some of this now.
We are also a pretty kinky couple. As stated, we go to stripper joints and do those things which we are both cool with. We also like to post naked and sex pictures on the internet. We have also have had sex live on webcam in front of a bunch of people we never have meet. A couple of times we sent her panties she wore during sex to people who wanted and watched them masturbate with them on web cam while we had sex. So we are not without our own little kink demons. This all turns us on and I think is healthy for our relationship.
For some reason though, the whole cuckold idea is not going over very well. I probably masturbate once or twice week thinking about it. I know she has a fear that if she does not do it. I will just find someone who would. This is not the case and do not want her to get pressured into something she really does not want to do just to fulfill my fantasy. She has said she will just do it for that reason. However, this goes against many of the reasons I feel I want to do this (i..e. watching her pleasure).
What would be the best approach to this scenario? If I could, I would just drop the subject and not bring it up. However, knowing her, I really think it is something that she would really be turned on doing once we did it. She was very reserved about the stripper thing and seeing another woman touch me. She wanted to go check it out and ever sense loves it. She says it does turn her on to watch another women touch me.
Does anyone have any advice? Is there anywhere I could turn her to get some more information on the subject or should I just keep this fantasy to myself? I am pretty open to how she would want to do this if an interest was parked (i.e. a date without me, someone we pick up at a bar, an old sex buddy, swingers \ cuckold personal, etc…).
Also, I have no problem showing her what I wrote here if anyone has advice. There is nothing I said on this that she does not already know.
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replied May 15th, 2009
Dear prjaf380212
So after reading your thread, this is what I came up with.
1. Maybe you shouldn't force her into doing it. She probably feels pressured, it's like when a girl tells a man "don't cum yet" and then he cums almost immedietly because of the pressure? Yea I'm pretty sure she feels like that. You should talk to her about it.
2. If she thinks you guys are going to break up by the end of the summer, then why would she wanna do something like that for you,where she doesn't feel comfortable?? Maybe you two need to work on making your bond stronger, and then go from there. Don't just try to make it strong for 3 days and then ask her to do it. Show her you want you guys to grow together and be a stronger couple, and she'll realize that since you're doing something to make your relationship stronger, maybe in return if she fulfills this fantasy for you, it'll make your sexual relationship stronger.
3. You need to sit down and talk to her about all this. Typing this online isn't going to help her see anything. We are not your girlfriend, she needs to know how you feel, and You need to hear and actually understand what she's saying.
3. no you are not being taken for a "fool" She is saying that she doesn't believe in sleeping withsomeone else while in a relationship, because that's her way of getting out of it. She's not comfortable with the idea, and she needs a scape goat. Like I said before, If you two fix everything that's going on between you two, maybe she would do what you wanted her too.. She's already done it before, what's stopping her now? Nothing, but You aren't helping the situation either. She's not just going to have sex with some random guy,let you watch then you guys just happen to break up a few months later and she ends up, and what if you two have mutual friends and you go around telling everyone? Did you ever take the time to really listen to what she's saying and understand and talk about it, instead of just getting upset because she's not fulfilling your fantasy? Maybe you two need to sit down with out the game being on tv, and talk it out. Really understand where she's coming from and have her understand, because with out you two talking nothing will be resolved, but both of you have to be calm and be willing to understand each other
And lastly she's not going to just "go through it with lust" if she really feels that the two of you have problems, and if that's her main concern about you two breaking up or what not.. trust me she isn't going to go through it, your only solution is to talk to her. Good luck buddy.
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replied May 19th, 2009
Experienced User
Re: I applaud you for being so open
worrywart01 wrote:
furrytail wrote:
Past50,
I would have to say that I admire your openess towards your wife having sex and I also find her stance of doing it with other men pretty neat as well. I know that the opposite is kind of true as well. As a Massage Therapist I get many men who are sent out for a massage by their wifes so that they can get off by some elses hand.
I don't think you're weird, especially is she is enjoying it.

Wendy


...i send my guy to a masseuse to get a massage.. Shocked personally, i think its unprofessional to bring a sexual act into a simple relaxing massage... if i ever found out my bf was touched inappropriately I'd be furious...whats the difference between paying someone on the street and getting a "professional" to do it?...nothing in my opinion...maybe that was a bit harsh however, i just dont feel like its appropriate to be whacking a guy off when his wife/significant other/gf is paying your bills by sending him there and would probably not be ok with it..i for certain am not


I agree with you regarding this issue.

I also agree with most of your thoughts that you have made regarding "watching my wife have sex with someone else" in other replies. Most of your ideas match with my thoughts (HOWEVER, I am NOT saying I am right and you or everybody else out there should be like me). I am 22/m, virgin(!), and honestly speaking, I cannot even imagine my future wife having sex with somebody else, forget about actually having sex (narrow-minded? may be according to many people). My love life is dedicated to the woman to whom I will get married. I will never have sex with any woman except her and I expect her to do the same ("philosophical", ya I know). She is my love and she alone is enough for me. I will not require a second woman to satisfy my sexual desires and I expect the same from her. She is physically and emotionally enough for me and I expect her to treat me the same way. She will be the first and last woman in my life and I want to be the first and last man his life. I am ready to fulfill her wishes as much as I can and I want her to be always with me since I will also be always there with her. I will share my happy moments with her and try to ease her life during her difficult times. Ya I know my thoughts are like of the old age but that is what I believe and I have prepared myself for that.

A note for everyone: For those of you who are thinking to attack me on this issue, PLEASE don't do that. Whatever I have said here reflects my personal opinion and I do NOT intend to say I am right or you people should be like me. As a matter of fact, I am NOT forcing anything on anyone and you have the complete freedom to lead your life the way you want to. God bless everyone!
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replied May 21st, 2009
I'm actually very interested in how the men feel about being watched having sex by the husband.

Overall I admire you sir; but personally I could not do that, as my woman is mine and if I can't sexually please her then it's not working out. However I understand you're aged and need to spice things up.

Have you considered a threesome? If you've never done that with your wife before you may enjoy it more than watching.
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replied May 21st, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
Re: I applaud you for being so open
concernedn wrote:
worrywart01 wrote:
furrytail wrote:
Past50,
I would have to say that I admire your openess towards your wife having sex and I also find her stance of doing it with other men pretty neat as well. I know that the opposite is kind of true as well. As a Massage Therapist I get many men who are sent out for a massage by their wifes so that they can get off by some elses hand.
I don't think you're weird, especially is she is enjoying it.

Wendy


...i send my guy to a masseuse to get a massage.. Shocked personally, i think its unprofessional to bring a sexual act into a simple relaxing massage... if i ever found out my bf was touched inappropriately I'd be furious...whats the difference between paying someone on the street and getting a "professional" to do it?...nothing in my opinion...maybe that was a bit harsh however, i just dont feel like its appropriate to be whacking a guy off when his wife/significant other/gf is paying your bills by sending him there and would probably not be ok with it..i for certain am not


I agree with you regarding this issue.

I also agree with most of your thoughts that you have made regarding "watching my wife have sex with someone else" in other replies. Most of your ideas match with my thoughts (HOWEVER, I am NOT saying I am right and you or everybody else out there should be like me). I am 22/m, virgin(!), and honestly speaking, I cannot even imagine my future wife having sex with somebody else, forget about actually having sex (narrow-minded? may be according to many people). My love life is dedicated to the woman to whom I will get married. I will never have sex with any woman except her and I expect her to do the same ("philosophical", ya I know). She is my love and she alone is enough for me. I will not require a second woman to satisfy my sexual desires and I expect the same from her. She is physically and emotionally enough for me and I expect her to treat me the same way. She will be the first and last woman in my life and I want to be the first and last man his life. I am ready to fulfill her wishes as much as I can and I want her to be always with me since I will also be always there with her. I will share my happy moments with her and try to ease her life during her difficult times. Ya I know my thoughts are like of the old age but that is what I believe and I have prepared myself for that.

A note for everyone: For those of you who are thinking to attack me on this issue, PLEASE don't do that. Whatever I have said here reflects my personal opinion and I do NOT intend to say I am right or you people should be like me. As a matter of fact, I am NOT forcing anything on anyone and you have the complete freedom to lead your life the way you want to. God bless everyone!


agreed...i couldn't bear myself to see another woman touch my man..or him touch her! it would break my heart into pieces..I'm a firm believer of monogomy..i'm with my man..thats it..i dont want another man touching me...i try to understand but for the life of me i just plain dont get it! I just dont understand HOW seeing your significant other sharing themselves with someone else would be enjoyable! maybe i'm just wired differently....call me selfish but..whats mine is mine..dont touch! Smile
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replied May 22nd, 2009
Experienced User
RE:worrywart01
I can't believe this, your thoughts are exactly like that of mine even though we differed so seriously on a certain issue earlier!

Your thoughts, in my opinion, are neither wierd nor selfish. If you want your man to dedicate himself only to you because you are also dedicating yourself only to him, that's not unfair at all. Your thoughts are simply great! I respect your feelings.

I pray to God you and your man remain blessed for etermity!
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replied May 28th, 2009
Excited by 'cheating'
This has got to be one of the most complex sexual topics (I know - aren't they all!) I think it is because sex can be so complex that we seek ways to simplify it - ie that we are supposed to be completely monogomous, that wanting more than one partner is wrong etc etc.

However what most of us do want is the happy loving companionship of another human being. For some this will be entirely monogomous, experience tells us that for most monogomy is not that realistic.

Even this is a little too simple - marrying the first sexual partner you ever have is a far bigger challenge to monogomy than if it is the 10th, 20th or 50th. There is an aspect of us that needs to have experienced different people, to look back and remember making love to different kinds of people and considering that part of a fun and fulfilled life.

The singles amongst us will often say - if they want sex elsewhere then end it. But if we're 20 years married with kids, those decisions are far far far bigger. And for those of us who want our relationships to be for life, sometimes we have to find ways to accomodate non-monogomous feelings.

My wife had virtually no experience before me, I had slept with about 20 women in my teens / twenties. I felt pretty cool with settling down, but I realised after a while that my wife was not so happy. She felt she'd missed out. I found out the hard way because she had an affair that almost finished us. However I come from a broken home and I refuse to do that to my kids - and I still loved her. So we worked through it, realised that actually she wanted and needed a little more sex experience. As I accepted this, as strange thing happened - it started to turn me on. I thought we could just incorporate this into our own sex lives.
Since then she has had a couple of sexual encounters, and the sex we had after them was the best ever. Why? I think because she felt desirable and sexy in a way she never had before.
SOme might say that this is a self image problem and they'd be right, but such things are not solved quickly but through years of work. In the meantime, careful experimentation does not seem to be a bad thing. And the problems we had before made us look much closer at ourselves and brought us closer together than we were before.
It all takes work - the worst thing you can do is take a partner for granted. You have to be aware of their needs and talk to them about it and your own needs. If you're both in love, then you'll find a way to accomodate them all.
Too many of us expect to have a partner that just moulds themselves around our own expectations - they don't exist and if that is what someone is doing then they're not happy.
So vive la difference - there are many different ways to live and love - none of us own any other human being, therefore we can not demand monogomy - only respect.
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replied May 28th, 2009
Supporter
i think that since you and your wife are fine with it, then it's no one's business.

but i would like you two to be very careful b/c you never know who has what. sometimes with an excited open sex life comes with the down fall or STD'S.
So be careful!
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replied July 18th, 2009
letting my wife have sex with other men
i have been in this situation myself. my wife has had a fantasy to have me and another man at same time.she did pick 1 guy we both knew.i agreed to let her meet him 1on1 to begin with.they tried 3 times to do it but never really got to the actual intercourse part. finally recently we did all meet and everyone was happy. also recently she knows a older doctor that shes gotten pretty close with. i did agree to let her have sex with him 1 time and then we would have to all meet. she did meet him and did have protected sex with him,no oral sex just intercourse.i discussed it with him and he agreed.we set a date and the day before he cancelled, my wife took it pretty hard and was real upset.finally the doctor talked to her and said it wasnt her just he needed to think about actually meeting both of us. i had told them both no more 1 on1. now shes inquiring about me letting her have sex with him 1 more time. i have not decided. hard to figure out women.she said he was smaller than me,had a hard time keeping it up and wasnt a very good kisser,and she had to think of making love to me to orgasm.yet she wants to meet him again and drain him of semen,no condom this time.and then tell him we all need to meet. whats everyone elses take on this.am i being selfish if i say no it has to be all 3 of us or nothing?also shes fine with me letting her do other men but said absolutely not on me doing another woman.is this wrong?
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replied July 18th, 2009
very strange to me watching your wife give another man head. i would never be able to kiss her after that. to see another man bend my wife over and bang her is a bit too much for me but to each his own
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replied July 19th, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
The things about fetishes is that they will allways be weird to people who don't share them. Watching your partner have sex with other men is a rare one so you're not going to find a lot of acceptance. If you and your wife both enjoy this activity and you respect the safety of one another and the men you play with then there's zero room for anyone to object.

Please communicate openly with your wife about your levels of involvement in this act with her. If one of you ever stops enjoying it you need to stop without exception. If you ever feel uncomfortable with any of her partners you need to talk to her about it honestly she needs to feel that she can do the same with you. Also realize these men are now a part of your relationship. You both have to hold them to certain standards of behavior one would have with a boyfriend as odd as that may seem to you. If they cross limits or disrespect your marriage you'll need to "break up" with them.
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replied July 23rd, 2009
im 25 and personnaly the thought of sum1 doin stuff with my bf turns me on but id want to and wouldnt b able to cope with the thought an sight of it all. id want to hurt that person...
also wat is the point being with sumone if sumone else is doing the job you shud be doing?
i just think its pointless having a realationship if theres sum1 else involved and will eventualy lead to problems dont u think?
wat about if ur wife enjoyed sex with one of those guys then goes to be with them...
i think its all a game of playing with fire but like i sed im 25 been with my first bf of 9yrs we were sexually active an now he dont even want me once a week so i dont even bother seeing him and i no he wouldnt want the situation that ur in. i feel lost looking at everyonelses problems on here makes me realise my own i guess.
lindz x
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replied January 1st, 2010
Wife's adventures
My wife and I read these posts with great interest. We both 37 and have been married for 13 years. It is a long story how we got here but for the past three years I have been watching her with other men. But, unlike Over Fifty, she does not want friends with benfits. She wants to keep her sexy side very private. As a result we travel 3 or 4 times per year to usually warm destinations where my wife transforms into a hot sexy godest. At home she is shy and consevative. When we are away we always use different names and she loves to wear high heels, short skirts and plunging necklines. She loves the attention she creates. Her persona is so different when we are away it seems I am married to two women. My wife is very pretty with a smoking hot body and we always manage to have a very hot time. We realize this is not for everyone but for us it an exciting diversion. It keeps us hot all year. We are either reliving past trips or planning new adventures. My wife gets hotter and wilder each trip so I never know what will happen next. For us this an exciting addition to our relationship. Back home she is shy, sweet and innocent but always ready to travel and explore her hot horny side.
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replied August 5th, 2013
hi
i am new for these site but my fantasy is lit bit old.i am from south asia small country.my english is not so good so sorry for spelling.
i am married since 9 year and 35 and 30 my wife.sex life is good.but in my country women are lit bit shy & conservative.i am really interested in watching my wife having sex with other men specialy with black men and her it is not possiable and my wife is not intresed in these things i had told her so many time bt she diny this.i had photoshopped her photo with porno photographs and show her she said nothing and no reaction bt she take long breath. any idea how could i do this i want badly.
thank u
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replied April 12th, 2010
I have watched my wife and my friend in bed together several times in the last 25 plus years - It keeps getting better for all 4 of us in and out of the bedroom.
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replied May 24th, 2010
Been there, Done that
First of all cheating is when one is steping out with someone while their partner is unaware of what they're doing. It could be sexual in nature or just romance. If one has their partners permission then there is no cheating involved, but there are other potential problems one has to consider before desiding to open up this can of worms. Let me tell you my experiance. I considered my self to be very happily married for 17 years. 15 of those years were through the 70s and 80s. We were avid swingers and I still live on the memories-WOW-.Then she run off with someone. I thought I'd die. Finally I met another woman and got married. After 15 years of faithful marrige the subject came up and we started talking about it during sex. Sex got better & better the more we talked. Finally we desided to try it. She promice that she would never cheat like my first wife and that I would always be the love of her life. Guess what, 1 year into it she started stepping out and I caught her having sex with a stranger (to me). I divorced her and sulked for over a year. I hope you really can trust her and that it all works out for you cause it didn't for me. I am now single and have been for 3 years. I have all the sex I want, ( one on one, 3-somes, group, whatever I want or can find), BUT, Its not the same as having a partner that you feel you can trust there with you enjoying the same fantacies. I still masturbate to the memories, but thats all it is, memories. I would love to have someone like that but I personally can't bring myself to trust a woman like that again. I played the game and I lost. Twice. All I can say is, Good Luck
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