Broken Hearted Forum - Want him back..should I do it :(

Relationships > Broken Hearted Forum > Want him back..should I do it :(

Q: Want him back..should I do it :(

asked by: melanie_mouse on April 10th, 2009

New User

Not entirely sure whether this is the right forum! But here goes.

I was kind of seeing this guy a couple of months ago. Everything was great, we spoke lots, got on really well, went on lots of really nice dates Smile

! Since then he's moved 2 hours away. Seeing as we were never really 'officially' dating, he decided it was okay to flirt with lots of girls and brag to me about it! I couldnt really complain, seeing as we were never exclusive etc;. It was really hard seeing pictures of him and random girls on his facebook. We had a lot of arguements and stuff but managed to stay friends.

Anyway, just before christmas, we talked about how, we've alwayys really liked each other and stuff (we've been friends since we were 15/16). We never did anything sexual before he moved away. There was never really a right time, and im a virgin so,. Anyway, we talked about having sex and stuff maybe when he came back home. Then two days later, he met this girl and started flirting with her over facebook. Needless to say I was hurt. Then he went really cold and distant with me! They started going out in January. He didnt tell me, or mention her. I only know because he changed his facebook status.

He's back home now visiting family for easter. We met up at the start of the week, and went for coffee and to a pub to catchup.It was nice seeing him and getting to talk and stuff. He started bragging about his girlfriend to me, and tellin me about how they go out to clubs all the time, and how shes coming down to see him during the easter holidays. I was hurt. I dont care that he's going out with her, but I really could have done without knowing shes going to be visiting!

Anyway. For a while, he's been asking me to send him topless webcam pics over the internet. I havent, because, I dont want to just be some random girl who gets naked for him on webcam! Also because, i just dont want to get naked on camera. Ive told him that, but he hasnt stopped asking. Sometimes he sounds like he's joking, but other times he seems to be deadly serious. I REALLy want him back and feel like I should do it, so he doesnt think im a complete prude or something! I know he has a girlfriend and stuff and I dont understand WHY hes asking, when hes dating someone!

I just guess, I dont know whether i should just give in andtake the pictures for him in the hope it might make him stop being nasty to me! And i dont understand what he wants from me,...like why hes asking for naked pics when he has a girlfriend at university!

Replies(7)

mib

replied on April 10th, 2009

New User

DO NOT give into his requests and take naked pics. He is bad news. If he had any feelings for you he would definitely wait for you and not flirt with other girls and then go on to ask you for pics. He is bad news and you are a virgin so DO NOT waste your time on a piece of crap like him. You will find someone who will appreciate you and not ask you to do things which you are doubtful about when you are not even in an exclusive relationship.

If you give in to him who knows.....he might show your pics to others and I am sure that is not what you want.

If you do as he asks, before you know it he will end up wanting to take your virginity as well just to boast about it. Don't waste something so precious on that type of guy.

Please do not make that mistake. Forget about him. Girls always think doing what a guys wants will enable her to keep him, but that is so far from the truth. When he has what he wants from you he WILL move on. He has already shown you that he has no interest in you by flirting with others. Wait for someone decent.

If you want to talk private message but please do not listen to him and give into him.

from Concerned

Users who thank mib for this post: Fairy Godmother

mommy275

replied on April 15th, 2009

Experienced User

Totally agree with mib, he is not worth it, you need to look at what he's been doing so far and what he's done in the past, who's to say he's not going to do that to you? If he's got a gf and he's asking you for nude pics that alone should be a red flag. He's a player and you will end up getting hurt if this continues. Good luck.

ServiceU

replied on May 7th, 2009

Supporter

what do you mean "maybe he'll stop being nasty to you"! why would you want to be with someone who isnt nice to you, or even consider giving him nude pictures. what if he post it on the net.
he sounds like he is very immature for him to brag about things to you. this is something he should be telling his males friends, not a girl that likes him. these are the red flags he is giving you, for you to run away.
if you get with him......i can predict the rest of, and the end of ya'll relationship.
he's going to do and say hurtful things to you, he's going to disregard your feelings, and your going to feel like you made a big mistake.
if your still a virgin cheerish that with someone who loves you.

Rosie H

replied on May 7th, 2009

Extremely eHealthy

this is obviously a guy who likes to see how far a girl will go for him,,,its all a game to him and do not sell yourself short for this guy. Thats all you will doing is selling your precious sacred body for his sick pleasures. It will leave you feeling cheap and used. Only the man who you give your virginity to deserves to see your breasts..not this cheater who thinks its fun to look at other girls when he has a girlfriend. If he was a real friend or even care about you at all he wouldnt even ask you to do this

Rosie H

replied on May 7th, 2009

Extremely eHealthy

JUst remember why you are still a virgin...what were your personal reasons?

Then think of this guy....is he worth it? Does doing things for him go against your personal choices?

If it feels wrong then it probably is wrong

yankeej3

replied on May 20th, 2009

New User

i can tell you right now this guy is not worth your time. it sounds like he just wants to use you for your body and then brag to his friends about it. worst case he could be planning to use those photos against you in the future(not meant to scare or upset you...sorry). in all honesty if the only way to keep this guy in your life is by doing something like that, then that right there should be a clear warning sign that he is no good. there are plenty of guys out there that are genuinely good guys and would never even consider doing something like that to you.

i can understand that you don't want to lose someone you've been close to for so many years, but it sounds like he isn't the same guy you knew back then. Also he has a girlfriend.

my guess about that is he is bragging to you about her, to A) he's trying to get a reaction out of you B) he is so into her that he doesn't realize that he's doing it, though that's probably unlikely since he's trying to get you to take naked photos. either case he's a jerk and you don't deserve to waste your time on a guy like that.

any guy would be lucky enough that have a girl with the kind of devotion and heart you seem capable of putting into a relationship, and he doesn't deserve it.

most importantly, don't give your virginity up to this guy, or anyone that easily. your first time should be something you treasure and look back on with fond memories, not as a mistake. i am also still a virgin, and i personally wouldn't want my first time to be something i regret. I'd want it to be with a person that loved me as much as i loved them.

if you'd like to talk feel free to send me a message, but don't let this guy talk you into doing those things.

J3nnyuk

replied on May 26th, 2009

Moderator

hey sorry to hear about your situation but i agree with the others definatly do not send these pictures to him if he was a decent guy then he would have told you about his girlfriend and also he would definatly not be asking for naked pics of someone else, find yourself a nice guy someone who will look after you not some playboy. you deserve better hun good luck...jenny

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