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Relationships > Troubled and Abusive Relationships Forum > Trying to leave my abusive boyfriend
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Q: Trying to leave my abusive boyfriend
asked by: ecd2 on January 22nd, 2009
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I'm 19 years old I've been with him for over two years now, I really love him but I’m realising that the good times we have don’t outweigh the bad anymore.
I get constant phone calls seeing where I am, he accuses me of cheating on him constantly but as a 'joke' apparently, if I say something he doesn’t like or if I annoy him in any way I’ll get a punch, I’ve started to fight back because I can't just take it anymore but he's stronger than me.
I recently moved to go to university and he move as well to be with me, before we moved though he tried to blackmail me into not going to uni because he didn't want to move. He's always said that if I leave him he'll kill himself.
On our two year anniversary he kicked me to the ground, this was the first time it has been that bad I cut all contact with him but 4 days later he turned up at my flat forced his way in and wouldn't leave, he wasn't being horrible quite the opposite I told him exactly how he makes me feel and he ended up in tears and I cracked and said he could have one more chance but he's got to change. He'caca since then and I’ve finally had enough of the relationship, my plan was to finish with him just before I go home for a week but now he’s being nice again and it’s making it even more difficult. I don’t know whether I should just ring him and do or should I meet up with him?
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karmapolice21
replied on January 22nd, 2009
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Get away!
dont meet up with him, you need to get a restraining order and get the police to tell him. if he is like that on good days, he will be even worse when you tell him you have had enough. tell people you trust and care about what you are planning on doing and get as much support as you can because he will try his best to make you reconsider. What is really important is your safety, and he is not providing a safe environment for you mentally or physically. Good luck hun! You can do it!
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michelly
replied on January 22nd, 2009
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GO COLD
DO not call him, do not see him, He is bad for your health. HE WILL EVENTUALLY HURT YOU VERY BADLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!! You are obviously a person with goals and he can't stand the fact that you deep down do not need him. Please talk to someone, just not to him.
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always23
replied on January 24th, 2009
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life is so short! be happy
U are way too young, go live life. Get away,let family and friends help! Take action...
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J3nnyuk
replied on January 27th, 2009
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I agree this guy has got issues for some reason.....you need to live your life have fun and get someone who really cares for you.....not someone who phones every 5 mins asking where are you who you with.....Good luck Jenny
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ServiceU
replied on May 8th, 2009
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dont meet up with him, dont call him, dont do anything with him!
do not presue a relationship with someone that beats you. this doesnt just go away, an abuser needs counseling to find out why they do what they do.
i completely understand! my boyfriend used to hit me once in the blue mood, but he was stronger than me so i started throwing things to make him stop. i felt like i was living a life of a bit pull. angry, mad, and attack when threatened.
if you stop all communications from him, hopefully this will make him think and change. unfortunately i know a lot of people who dont.
good luck
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