so ive been dating my boyfriend for a long
time now. we move pretty slowly because im
somewhat afriad of sex. so i occasionally
give him handjobs and just fool aroud with
his penis.But when it come for him to
"give me mine" i freek out. he knows ive
never orgasmed before and he wants me to.
so he wants to finger me, but i never ask.
so we get in the mood kinda thing with
everything getting all hot and then he
starts to caress my vagina which i love
but when he actaully starts to go into
fingering. i freek out i mean it feels
good. but mabey im just embarrassed to
climax infront of him? then i always just
tell him to stop after a short while and
occasionally i have cried. i dont know why
i cant follow through, i mean i want to
orgasm but i kinda cant?? and i dont
really want to masturbate, and if i did i
wouldnt know how. someone help?
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knasli01
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 03 Mar 2008 Posts: 8
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
Posted: 06-13-08 05:58am
Well, I can relate to not allowing a
someone to make me climax for a long time.
But, you really should try and learn about
what you are feeling, and YOU will always
be your best sexual partner!
And what you said made me think of it. I
think that you should really try and find
out what makes you feel good. Then
overcome how you feel about allowing
someone else to make you feel good.
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kim1uk
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Jun 2008 Posts: 1
trouble reaching orgasm Posted: 06-15-08 18:15pm
Firstly, buy a vibrator! you can buy the
discreetly online from loads of places
e.g. anne summers.
A good vibrator will avoid the direct
touching of your clit that you seem to
want to avoid, and will give you a
powerful orgasm in 2-3 minutes.
Once you know the sensation that you are
aiming for, you will i) want to feel that
again ASAP! and ii) will be able to use
either your hand, or your boyfriends hand
(actually, his tongue would be
preferable!!!) to bring on that
sensation.
I also recommend that you ask your
boyfriend to masturbate in front of you.
This will make you less self conscious
about climaxing in front of him.
Dont deny yourself the pleasure of orgasms
a moment longer!
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2eatoria
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Jun 2008 Posts: 32
Posted: 06-15-08 20:45pm
I'm a man, but my advice to you is that
you need to spend some quiet time with
yourself, and learn how to play with that
thing, then teach your man what makes you
tick. Every woman is different, and you
have the advantage of being inside
yourself, and being able to tell what
feels the best, and what should be
avoided. Then don't be shy about helping
him help you when the time comes again.
If he's a jerk about not wanting to take
some gentle direction, he's probably a
jerk in other ways too.
This last thing can be a real relationship
killer. My wife and I have been married
for 15,000 years (plus or minus a few
zeroes,) and we've had a lot of sexual
frustration because we were both raised by
really puritanical families, and we're
ridiculously embarrassed to talk about sex
(even though we're both comparatively
freaky and kinky.) You wouldn't believe
the long-term frustration you can wind up
with if you're too shy to just say "Hey,
move a little to the left, and less tooth"
or something.
It's worth the effort to get over such
hangups. Orgasms rock. I recommend an
orgasm a day, at least. (And I will note
for the record that while it is usually
women who have trouble with this issue,
I've actually been known to fake orgasms
myself on occasion. Orgasm trouble isn't
just for the ladies.)
