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tried talking to my parents

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i have always found it difficult to talk about the way i am feeling and normaly write it down in a letter. however yesterday i decided that sitting down and talking through what i am going through rationaly with my mum and step-dad would be a good idea. because i have started to improve slowly it now feels like they are in denial about me having depression at all and i feel like they are ashamed of me because of it. i tried sitting down with them, my dad is a teacher and has alot of work to do but he knew how hard it was for me to do this. when we sat down he just carried on doing his work and making snide comments at what i was trying to say, my mum was in the room aswell and doing all the talking with me. i started crying within a couple of minutes because it felt like they didnt care or want to listen. i ended up walking of and couldnt stop sobbing, i feel so pathetic because i thought that it would be ok to just sit and talk. i feel so worthless and just don't know what to do anymore, they are treating me as though i am making everything up and are ashamed of me. my mum takes me to see the psychiatrist when i have an appointment but she makes a point of not coming in with me. has anyone else had this experience? me and my mum are normaly realy close but it feels like she is distancing herself.
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replied February 6th, 2012
Dear givenup,

From my experience, psychiatrists generally prefer one on one help. Patient-doctor confidentiality is very important for psychiatrists. Unless if the patient (you) is very young, patients visit their doctors without others in the room. The doctor wants to make sure that you feel like you can share as much information as you need to without feeling pressured by an outside source. For example, someone who is abused by their mother would not benefit from having their mother in the room with the psychiatrist because they will feel pressured not to speak about the situation.

To summarize, your mom probably just understands that patient-doctor confidentiality is very important in psychiatry and does not want to interfere with that. Likewise, I bet your psychiatrist has requested that you be alone during the session so you can feel free to tell him anything without having to fear another family member's actions.
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replied February 7th, 2012
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but there is no point she is always asking to talk to mum and everything i say she puts into a letter anyway to send home again.
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replied February 7th, 2012
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Sorry Alex,

You are confused on this issue. It is up to the patient to decide who attends appointments with them. In my experience shrinks prefer to see someone close to the patient at least once in a while, simply as a way of verifying the patient's problems.

There is no issue at all relating to doctor/patient confidentiality as the patient has waived that issue by bringing someone in.

To Given,
The reaction of your parents is, sadly, quite common. You see, if they accept and admit you have depression, then they think they are judged as "bad parents". They are only listening for themselves and not you at all.

You need to see a therapist to talk this out, not someone who is in denial. And selfishly so. My father denied any responsibity from 1961 until his death last year. Never once admitted the slightest fault.
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