hi francisco-
i have good news and bad news. The good news is you either are bi-polar or you are not so it is unlikely if she has not been diagnosed as bi-polar that she will become bi-polar. The bad news is that it is quite common for gad to develop into other anxieties like panic disorder and depression.
But the re is more good news.... The answer for me was cognitive behavioral therapy (cbt). I was on meds for many years before I found cbt and it cured me and got me off meds in a remarkably short period of time. Cbt is not like other talk therapy. A good cbt therapist does not care much about your past or why you think you feel the way you do etc. A good cbt therapist knows they cannot change what's already happened to you but they can help you change how you deal with what happens in your life from here on out. It's all about using the tools to learn to think more clearly and accurately about things and once you do your anxiety, panic and depression will miraculously begin to lift before your eyes. It was inspiring to see the people that dove in head first and how fast they started seeing results to those of us like me that were more skeptical and less dedicated to using the tools in the beginning. Like anything in life the more you put in the more you get out of cbt. That's why I think group settings can be especially effective with cbt because you can see the people that are working the hardest to get well making the most progress and it becomes infectious.

I hope this is helpful as cbt is not easy but well worth the effort involved and can turn your wife's life around if she uses the tools.

Take care!


Q

The problem here may be getting your wife to do anything at all, if she's "happy" with things as they are why would she change or try anything else?? You can guide/suggest but only she can act!!

I get the feeling that you still love your wife (otherwise you wouldn't stick around & you wouldn't care etc). Are there any support groups for family members of people with mental health issues near you? This could help you find out what's available in your area & what others have found useful that you might try in order to get your wife to act!!

How old are your kids, could they be co-opted to help you help your wife??
Would your wife take some "vitamins"? There are some natural medications like 5htp (tryptophan), sam-e, vitamin b's, dhea, that can hep or even overcome many mental health issues (every one is different) these shouldn't interfere with any meds your wife is on & she might be willing to take them on the basis of general well-being/general good health (i know it's not totally honest but sometimes backdoors are necessary).

Many meds lower or totally eliminate your sex drive whereas the natural ones do not do this especially dhea (it can actually increase sex drive, emotions etc).

Could you talk to your wife's dr about where you are at & whether he/she feels that it would be detrimental to your wife to talk to her about your feelings & the fact that you feel your marriage to be on the line?? If your wife really knew this it might give her enough of a push to do something.

Is there anything you & she or all of you as a family enjoy doing together? Is she interested in anything? Getting her doing things that are positive might also help, giving her positive feedback when she shows positive emotion or interest in things could help too. Most of us respond to positive input (even if it takes time before others see that it's worked) - this is an area that the kids (if old enough) could really help with, the maternal instinct can be pretty strong.

Good luck

Hi francisco, I like purple's advise about positive input and doing things together as a family. I'm in a cbt group right now and it is really helping so if you can get her involved in one that would be good too. My cbt group is free of charge other than two books I had to buy. The obitz book mentioned in qt3's post above and mastery of your anxiety and panic-third edition by michelle craske and david barlow as I suffer from panic disorder as well.