The majority of women don't even have a hymen. Some had one at one point but it can be broken during sports, riding horses, putting tampons in, and other things of that sort. I personally didn't bleed at all when I first had sex so I can't give you any words of experience there. If you do happen to bleed you need to do whatever feels comfortable. Most of the time, bleeding is caused due to lack of lubrication before intercourse. Try to be sure that you are thouroughly turned on or have enough lubricant before trying. Having a caring partner helps loads as well.

If you do have a hymen that can break during sex, it may bleed what seems like a lot; mine did, but it didn't happen during my first sex act. Thankfully it happened in the shower lol. It usually stops fairly quickly, and you may spot for a day or so afterwards.

However, my hymen was unusual anyway, so it really doesn't count. Most women don't have an intact hymen by the time they have sex. The myth of "popping the cherry" is false.

Sex should not hurt. If it hurts, then something is wrong. Even sex for a virgin should not hurt. My first time was painless and amazing. I didn't bleed, either. And no, my boyfriend was not small

Monkey and eiri are both right.

The typical hymen is broken long before a girl ever has sex, like monkey said. There is usually little or no pain involved, so most girls don't even realize when it happened.

Many girls bleed during sex due to rips and tears from not being lubricated enough. That problem is usually easily solved with a water-based lubricant.

Like eiri said though, women are built differently. So some women have a much tougher hymen than the norm. Their hymen might stay intact for longer, and it might bleed more when it does tear, but keep in mind that they are not the norm.

...i bled..what seemed to be like quite a bit lol...actually i did the first few times we did any kind of sexual act, just bc before my bf i have now I had never done anything more than kiss a guy...soooo..i dunno maybe i'm weird...but the first few times for me were..kinda messy...but its all good now...

Many women bleed, sometimes quite a bit, if there is not enough lubrication. So that could have also been your problem.

more than likely, because of nerves especially...kinda got in the way of me actually enjoying sex...actually thats why i'm on bc now...now i dont freak out so much about getting pregnant...its helped with my stress tremendously which has defintely improved the sex life

Exactly; being nervous can definitely maker you dry. A lot of girls don't seem to know that! That's great to hear that you're using protection!

i did not bleed when i lost my virginity, nor did i find it to be painful. my boyfriend and i have had sex quite a few times since then, but the last time we had sex, i bled quite a bit, although it has stopped and only happened immediately after sex. what i'm worried about though is that i'm able to actually see that something has been torn, but i have no idea what to do! thoughts?

kitsonchick...
what has been torn and how much? i'm presuming that if it has stopped bleeding, you're probably ok. you just need to let it heal before you have sex again. do you know what happened that caused this tear to occur? maybe some activity (fingering, or penetration) before you were wet enough? maybe you got too dry and still kept on having sex?

typically problems like this are caused by either one of two things. 1) not enough lubrication or 2) something sharp like a fingernail making the cut.

make sure to allow yourself plenty of time to heal. also, be very careful not to get any bacteria in your vagina. wash your hands thoroughly before and after going to the bathroom, make sure you wash your hands and anything else that comes in contact with your vagina as well (fingers, toys, penis, etc.). hehe.

hope you feel better sweetie.
jasmine