Scared About Child Care, Need Advice!

there is always the option of social assistance. i know some people are too proud to even consider it, but it is meant for times when you just can't do it any other way and there is nothing wrong with getting help so you can keep your baby. it doesn't sound like you want to give your baby up and it would be really sad if you did and regretted it later. there is a reason that there are social safety nets in our society so that you can get back to a point where you are able to do it on your own. is it something you would consider an option?

thanks for the quick reply kaerbear! Yes, I am open to social assistance and have spent the last 4 weeks getting approved for Medicaid and WIC. It is a HUGE relief to be able to go to the doctor tomorrow and the WIC will also help out alot. I dont know if I am just getting bad information or not but in trying to get approved for Medicaid I was told there is no childcare assistance I can get in Texas. I was also told due to my job I do not qualify for foodstamps. I am open to anything at this point and will consider any options!

You might want to consider an open adoption. That is when you are allowed to visit and interact with your child, but they are raised in a financially stable home.

This question may be harsh, so I appologize ahead of time.

Do you see your financial situation changing soon? Or even in the next few years?

Because, If this is a rough patch, I agree, there are many ways that the state can help you. (and I'm sure we can figure out how). But, If this is going to be a long term situation, and your are open to the idea of adoption, you might really want to think about it.

We're here for you hun.

well i dont know how it works where you live but here if you want child care assistance to get it right away you have to not have a job and they will give it to you and you have 2 weeks to find a job . in those 2 weeks if you dont find a job you lose your assistance and you will be put on a waiting list once you do find a job.

with my son i had a job which i had had for years so i was put on a waiting list which it took me 13 months to get my assistance.

Melissa, if I undersstand it correctly, there is childcare assistance if you are jobless (like Chase4 said) but otherwise basically is impossible to get (too many people waiting for it). I did speak with an attorney free of charge who can pursue childsupport but even he admitted it would not be easy to get or quick coming. Most of the father's income is paid off the books and will be up to me to try to prove by subpeoning people I know have hired him. I cant count on this being there for me so although I am working on it I am not really adding it in to my decision right now.

mc4ever02, I have met with an adoption agency and they explained to me alot of the benefits of an openadoption. I also went to an adoption support group and heard a lot of pros and cons of adoption in general and open vs. closed. I do feel like I am being very selfish and I am trying to stay open to adoption...it may have been too soon for me to meet with other birthmothers...seing how they have dealt with adoption was pretty upsetting (in general). I wish I could say this was only a rough spot but I cant say that really. I could get a raise and I still continue to look for a better paying job. The least expensive childcare I have found so far is about $230/week. Without this expense things would still be tight but with it, it does seem pretty impossible : (

i don't really know about these things because i've never been on welfare, but i know people who have. how is it that some people are able to have kid after kid and never work but always get money from the government. maybe things are different down in the states than here in canada but i know there are tons of women here that totally rely on welfare for years, even generations and never have to get a job. i'm not against someone using welfare when they are in a situation where you would be forced to choose between keeping or giving up your child, it seems to me that those kinds of issues are what the welfare system is designed for. i just don't understand why it seems so easy for some people to stay on it for so long when others are struggling and can't get enough assistance. here in canada we also have federal employment insurance which you have to pay into whenever you have a job so that if you do get pregnant, provided you were working long enough before you apply, you get maternity and parental benefits for about a year. that's what i'm on now and thank god for that because i don't know how we would make ends meet without it. i really hope you find a way to work this out where you can be happy.

Here, all children can get medical insurance (cub care). Adults with children can get .Mainecare if they have a low income. Food stamps and a state check are dependent on income, but it's time limited. You can only go so long without working and they will stop your benefits. You have to either be in school, taking classes, disabled, or volunteering to qualify after your time period is up.
I'm all for people getting benefits as a transition, but to those who keep spitting out kids they can't support and the ones that get state aid that have no real interest in bettering themselves just plain irritate me.
It also irritates me when a healthy person without children gets .Mainecare, because they are too lazy to work.

Daycare is expensive, but .I'm sure there are programs aimed at single parents that help pay that expense (voucher programs) all over.
Wic is a great thing. I don't qualify, because .I make too much, but for the people that get it, it's great.

If you qualify for WIC, I am sure you qualify for other assistance. There has to be some kind of childcare assistance! My opinion is if money is the only reason you are considering adoption, please seriously consider your decision. It may or may not be the right move, I am not one to judge. If you really want to keep this baby, I believe there has to be a way. It may take a little work in finding out that way.

I do know that there is a lot of help out there for you. I have met a lot of women in different states who some how are able to make it work with assistance. It all depends on what you feel is right for you. You may have to sacrifice certain things and may have to live in a less expensive house/apt for the baby. I would continue to seek out assistance of all kinds in order to make a well informed decision. Perhaps there are other people on this forum from Texas who knows more about what is available!!!

Good luck.

I don't know much about getting assistance for childcare, or how to go about getting it.....but my mom used to run a licensed day care in our home, and she was paid by the state for some of the kids she watched. So I know it exists, I just don't know how to get it.

Thank you all for your advice and encouragement, it means a lot to me, really. I spoke with someone earlier today with the Texas Workforce Commission (the only state sponsored childcare aid). He told me once the baby is born I can apply for childcare assistance but he admitted the wait list was long and it all depended on funds available and how much I earn. It wasnt very encouraging but at least I felt like he was giving me accurate information (a lot of time I feel like I am being sent in circles and dont know if I am even pursuing viable options).

I also spoke with Catholic Charities & United Way, both very nice and offer assistance to teenage mothers but not someone specifially like me. I havent found any local groups where single parents have suggestions for how they handled this but Im sure something like that is out there. I did move into a less expensive apartment 2 months ago and am willing to do whatever I can to make this work. Thanks again for all your feedback & suggestions!