My boyfriend and I were discussing sex
earlier today, and upon being asked if he
enjoys our bed activities, he told me he
thought I was 'slightly loose'. I admire
his honesty, though blatant, but now I am
no longer in the mood to make love to him.
We've been having sex for over a year now
and all this time I thought I was blowing
his mind (we were both virgins) and then I
come to find this out.
I'm sure he didn't say that to make me
feel crappy, but now I don't think I want
to have sex anymore. He never said he
didn't enjoy making love, but my
confidence in my abilities has pretty much
disappeared now. FYI, the sex was amazing
on my end - I loved every second of it.
I still love him, there's no question
about that - I just feel inadequate now
knowing I don't quite fulfill his desires.
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PubertyIsMyLife411
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Feb 2007 Posts: 6
Posted: 06-16-07 23:52pm
well i must say that one he should be
happy that he's getting any
but maybe try twisting it up, maybe more
foreplay or something sometimes the same
old thing gets boring after a while, new
positions or foreplay might help...
also with my boyfriend i love to tease him
make him want YOU... thats always fun and
he enjoys it too
don't be put down by what he said, i have
noticed that some guys say things to make
you do other things (reverse psychology)
adding new things might spice it up a bit
and maybe you both might enjoy it more!
(hope this helps )
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Cambion
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Nov 2005 Posts: 748
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 06-17-07 07:43am
Hah, I thought the same thing - maybe I
can let him screw someone whose had kids -
then he'll understand what tightness is.
But we never dive right into the sex -
there's always making out and foreplay,
and we do try different positions. I did
buy some candy gel that I plan on using
during our playtime...if I'm in the mood
anyway. This was just a big shock to me -
now I know how a man feels when a woman
tells him he's small (which I may consider
telling him just to bust his chops like he
did to me).
If he wanted to spice things up, he went
about it the wrong way. In any case, I
think I'm going to abstain over my summer
break - I really don't feel the desire for
sex anymore.
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Birch
Supporter
Joined: 07 Nov 2005 Posts: 3962 Location: Bliss,
Thanks: 126
Thanked:12
Posted: 06-17-07 10:30am
Tell him if his penis was bigger, it
wouldn't be an issue.
I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself.
[Edit: oh, sorry, I didn't see that you
posted that in your reply.]
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Lion79
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Mar 2007 Posts: 303 Location: Sunderland, UK
Thanks: 2
Thanked:5
Posted: 06-17-07 17:47pm
What does he mean by too loose??? It's
gonna change size to fit around him,
otherwise you'd be in an awful lot of
pain.
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Llewellyn
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jan 2007 Posts: 1743 Location: NY
Posted: 06-17-07 19:44pm
Lion79
wrote:
What does he mean by too
loose??? It's gonna change size to fit
around him, otherwise you'd be in an awful
lot of pain.
Exactly. He should be proud that he gets
you "loose," as he puts it. The vagina is
kind of small and tight until a woman gets
in the mood. Then it grows to two to
three times it normal size and gets
lubricated. That prevents the vagina from
getting rips or tears in it.
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aszalajka
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 May 2007 Posts: 103 Location: ,
Posted: 06-19-07 16:13pm
I would be turned off too if my bf was
telling my im loose like ive been sleeping
around. but i sounds like it might be
something you will have to get over. does
he say he doesnt want sex with you? or
does he still want it??? if he still wants
sex with you then it sounds like something
your going to have to conquer on your on,
and not let bother you. which can be hard.
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Honekaur
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 May 2006 Posts: 56
Posted: 06-24-07 20:53pm
Like everyone else said, be honest about
his penis size(!!!). Anyway, it's good
that he was honest with you, but its
unfortunate that he feels that way! It's
going to happen to every girl when she has
sex with the same partner over a long
period of time! I remember when I was a
virgin, my bf's penis HURT. One thing you
can try to do is exercise your pc
muscle...I'm not sure if that exactly
helps or not because I haven't tried to do
it over a long period of time, but I've
read that it helps.
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Llewellyn
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Jan 2007 Posts: 1743 Location: NY
Posted: 06-24-07 20:56pm
Honekaur
wrote:
It's going to happen to
every girl when she has sex with the same
partner over a long period of time! I
remember when I was a virgin, my bf's
penis HURT.
Most people think having sex will make a
woman looser, but it's actually not the
case. Having a baby can make the vagina
looser, having sex won't. However, how
tight or loose a woman feels can change
daily depending on how in the mood she is
and how lubricated she is. So if her
boyfriend thinks she feels loose, that's
kind of like a compliment to him!
Your boyfriend's penis probably hurt at
first, not because you were any tighter,
but because you were nervous or not
lubricated enough. Not being lubricated
enough is the most common cause of pain
during sex.
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worriedplshlp
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jun 2007 Posts: 52 Location: independence
Posted: 07-02-07 03:13am
Exactly, I think he must just have a small
one and how would he know what is loose,
and tight. He's only been with you right?
He could have just been playing with you
to see how you would react.
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R-I
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Jun 2007 Posts: 253
Tight Loose Posted: 07-06-07 22:42pm
My boyfriend and i have only been with
eachother, and he says sometimes im loose
or tight.... But i know i can be "loose"
even when we havent had sex in awhile just
because i really really want him, and i
cant get my hands off him... Other times i
get caught off guard and im not fully
ready and i'm " tight". I think when he
says tight, there is more friction. When
this happens he cant hold it as long
because it feels tight and there is a lot
of friction! When he says im loose, im
always really ready for him and there isnt
as much friction, but it still obviously
feels incredible.
I hope this makes sense.... haha...
Btw, what are some of the excersises you
can do to make the musles tighter???!!!???
I WANNA DO THESE EXCERSISES!!!!!
By the way, your man should be happy that
he has someone to do it with, my boyfriend
sometimes i feel like doesnst apprciate
that he has me.... So, i play hard to get
and i deny him... It drives him crazy in a
good way, and it gets him amped and he
accually then appreciates it.
PLAY HARD TO GET!!!!!
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worrywart001
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 27 May 2007 Posts: 200
Posted: 07-06-07 22:50pm
loose? i dont think he knows what he's
talking about..like someone else said
early, the vagina lubricates itself to
prepare for sex and it adjusts to the size
of his penis...maybe he's just gettin alil
too much lovin lately and has just kinda
gotten used to everything...maybe you
should make him wait a few days and not do
anything, you know..take a small
break...see if he has any complaints in a
few days haha
excercises you can do to tighten i think
are called kegel excercises? you just
squeeze like you're holding your pee then
let loose then repeat...
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R-I
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Jun 2007 Posts: 253
Posted: 07-06-07 22:53pm
When i said "loose" i mean lubricated and
really ready to have sex
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mrsbuzski
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Jun 2007 Posts: 103 Location: U.S.A. -- Illinois
Whole Again Posted: 07-06-07 23:03pm
Just concentrate on yourself!
Start with something fun.
Gardening, music, dancing, sports,
cooking, anything YOU like!
The, "Other half"; will figure out you
don't give a rats ass.
CUZ.........Your just havin fun!
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MissesH25
Supporter
Joined: 10 Jul 2007 Posts: 11 Location: New Hampshire,
Posted: 07-10-07 04:48am
Wow. Why doesn't he tell you how he
really feels?! Sheesh!
Anyway, I'm big on communication. Maybe
you'd feel better telling him he hurt your
feelings. Perhaps he thought he was being
funny when he said it? Men can be like
that sometimes.
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MissesH25
Supporter
Joined: 10 Jul 2007 Posts: 11 Location: New Hampshire,
Re: Tight Loose Posted: 07-10-07 12:34pm
Rachel-Isabel
wrote:
My boyfriend and i have only
been with eachother, and he says sometimes
im loose or tight.... But i know i can be
"loose" even when we havent had sex in
awhile just because i really really want
him, and i cant get my hands off him...
Other times i get caught off guard and im
not fully ready and i'm " tight". I think
when he says tight, there is more
friction. When this happens he cant hold
it as long because it feels tight and
there is a lot of friction! When he says
im loose, im always really ready for him
and there isnt as much friction, but it
still obviously feels incredible.
I hope this makes sense.... haha...
Btw, what are some of the excersises you
can do to make the musles tighter???!!!???
I WANNA DO THESE EXCERSISES!!!!!
By the way, your man should be happy that
he has someone to do it with, my boyfriend
sometimes i feel like doesnst apprciate
that he has me.... So, i play hard to get
and i deny him... It drives him crazy in a
good way, and it gets him amped and he
accually then appreciates it.
PLAY HARD TO
GET!!!!!
I think you are referring to kegal
exercises.
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meblonde01
Supporter
Joined: 11 Apr 2007 Posts: 2123 Location: ,
Thanks: 6
Thanked:2
Posted: 07-10-07 12:42pm
worrywart001
wrote:
loose? i dont think he knows
what he's talking about..like someone else
said early, the vagina lubricates itself
to prepare for sex and it adjusts to the
size of his penis...maybe he's just gettin
alil too much lovin lately and has just
kinda gotten used to everything...maybe
you should make him wait a few days and
not do anything, you know..take a small
break...see if he has any complaints in a
few days haha
excercises you can do to tighten i think
are called kegel excercises? you just
squeeze like you're holding your pee then
let loose then
repeat...
I don't think the vagina adjusts to the
penis. My H has been with several other
women before me and he said there is a
diffident difference in the size of a
women. I have heard that from more than
one man too.. I guy I work with told me
after his wife had a child there was a
change.. But never the less, if a man
loves you or even kind of likes you he
should not say such a thing to hurt your
feeling or make you feel inadequate. But
I’m with Birch tell him maybe he need to
grow a little more..
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Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 07-10-07 12:53pm
meblonde01
wrote:
worrywart001
wrote:
loose? i dont think he knows
what he's talking about..like someone else
said early, the vagina lubricates itself
to prepare for sex and it adjusts to the
size of his penis...maybe he's just gettin
alil too much lovin lately and has just
kinda gotten used to everything...maybe
you should make him wait a few days and
not do anything, you know..take a small
break...see if he has any complaints in a
few days haha
excercises you can do to tighten i think
are called kegel excercises? you just
squeeze like you're holding your pee then
let loose then
repeat...
I don't think the vagina adjusts to the
penis. My H has been with several other
women before me and he said there is a
diffident difference in the size of a
women. I have heard that from more than
one man too.. I guy I work with told me
after his wife had a child there was a
change.. But never the less, if a man
loves you or even kind of likes you he
should not say such a thing to hurt your
feeling or make you feel inadequate. But
I’m with Birch tell him maybe he need to
grow a little more..
Every woman is a different size of course,
but if the vagina didn't adjust to the
penis, how do you think it adjusts to a
baby's head!?
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meblonde01
Supporter
Joined: 11 Apr 2007 Posts: 2123 Location: ,
Thanks: 6
Thanked:2
Posted: 07-10-07 12:55pm
Eiri
wrote:
meblonde01
wrote:
worrywart001
wrote:
loose? i dont think he knows
what he's talking about..like someone else
said early, the vagina lubricates itself
to prepare for sex and it adjusts to the
size of his penis...maybe he's just gettin
alil too much lovin lately and has just
kinda gotten used to everything...maybe
you should make him wait a few days and
not do anything, you know..take a small
break...see if he has any complaints in a
few days haha
excercises you can do to tighten i think
are called kegel excercises? you just
squeeze like you're holding your pee then
let loose then
repeat...
I don't think the vagina adjusts to the
penis. My H has been with several other
women before me and he said there is a
diffident difference in the size of a
women. I have heard that from more than
one man too.. I guy I work with told me
after his wife had a child there was a
change.. But never the less, if a man
loves you or even kind of likes you he
should not say such a thing to hurt your
feeling or make you feel inadequate. But
I’m with Birch tell him maybe he need to
grow a little more..
Every woman is a different size of course,
but if the vagina didn't adjust to the
penis, how do you think it adjusts to a
baby's head!?
I meant from being large and going small
to fit a penis.. not the other way around!
afcourse it can strech larger for child
bearing and larger men.
Last edited by meblonde01 on 07-10-07 12:56pm; edited 1 time in total
my question to you if you are both or were
virgins then how would he know what loose
is if he has never been with anyone else.
Sounds to me like he may have some
explaining to do. I know he said you were
loose but did he say he did not like it? I
think turning around and trying to hurt
his feelings about the size of his penis
is just asking for trouble. If you love
eachother and you admire him for his
honesty then tell him that the comment
hurt you. I am sure he most likely did
not mean it the way it came out. I have
had 1 child naturally and the size of
vigina has not change at all. But for
some women it will change it. I have pain
with sex and my doc told me that the vigin
opens to accomidate the size of said mans
penis but it will not shrink of the mans
penis is smaller you are one size and
thats it.
haha
