I met a lady 2 1/2 yrs ago. Blew into my
life like a hurricane.. Took it
over...From the very beginning I noticed
things were odd...Over the top
emotionally...Every comment was like a
knife to the heart... The yelling .. The
running out in a panic....The constant
validtation required....Wasnt till a year
later that she passed a flipant comment
the she panic/anxiety disorder.. The drugs
were in her glove box cause she didnt want
to be a drugged up zombie.. Once I new the
cause and the fact she was doing nothing
to manage it... I got angry and started
calling her on her antics.. Needless to
say that it was slow burn for the next
year... She finally called it quits and
told me to move on about 3 months ago.. I
was devastated as I loved her deeply and
wanted to support her if she would get
help.. She didnt want to .. But we managed
to go to a counsellor a few times.. I went
back to the counsellor after the break up
as I was devestated and was put on meds...
The counsellor believed from my stories
and meeting this women a few times that
she was actually bi-polar and not
panic/anxiety.. Never the less it took a
few months of counselling for her to
convince me that I had in fact done
nothing wrong.. That all feelings in a
bi-polar persons life are severely
amplified and that normal things get to
them much more.. Also.. A person as needy
as her would never find anyone to fill her
needs that she needs to fill them from the
inside.. It has been 3 months and I am in
a much better place althou still angry
that she knew she had this affliction but
wasnt up front and honest with me.. I
believe the relationship could have been
much different if she had been ... Anybody
experience a situation similar.. Would
love to know
Gary,
You put that very eloquently. You
explained the actions of a bipolar person
to a “T”. Well at least compared to my
situation you did. It’s been 2 years
since my breakup to my bipolar ex
fiancée. Same experience. I too thought I
was to blame for the relationship and
spent 2 years in therapy to learn
otherwise. You did the right thing by
continuing to go to therapy. The saddest
thing about this illness is that some
bipolar people (like in our case) don’t
do everything they can to get help. Like
you I was deeply in love with my ex and
was also put on medication for depression.
It’s been a long road but I too am in a
much better place.
If this is any comfort to you, the hardest
part of letting him go was understanding
that I couldn’t help him. Reading forums
and books on bipolar disorder helped.
I’ve let go of the anger now and realize
there is nothing for me to be angry about.
He is the way he is, and I am the way I
am.
