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I Can't Reach An Orgasm !! Help !

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aburris87

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Apr 2007
Posts: 9
Location: Freeport, IL
I Can't Reach An Orgasm !! Help !
Posted: 05-29-07 18:55pm

ive only been sexually active for about 2 months now and i can never seem to orgasm during sex! ive had 2 partners, one was a "minute man" so i knew i wouldnt reach it but the other one went for a while and i still wasnt able to orgasm!! i could feel it coming on but it never actually came! and another thing...before i started having sex, i could masturbate and finish within minutes, now it takes FOREVER! whether im having sex or just masturbating! whats wrong here??
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Tylanas

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Joined: 13 Jul 2005
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Posted: 05-29-07 20:02pm

It's interesting that for some reason masturbation doesn't work for you anymore... I don't have a lot of advice, aside from the fact that many women don't come during sex anyway.

I woud suggest clitorally stimulating yourself, or have him do it...
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Birch

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Joined: 07 Nov 2005
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Location: Bliss,
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Posted: 05-29-07 20:06pm

That's interesting. I don't know what could've changed-didja have some life altering event or something?

People change. Maybe your biology changed or something. Maybe you need a whip, or a french tickler, or a cage, or a gang. :Very
Happy:

My bf was a 'minute man' once upon a time, but no longer. I myself used to have multiple orgasms in frequent intervals (the banshees were jealous of my shrieking) but no more.

Try new things, try different things. And when in doubt, buy a triple threat ladybug.

http://www.edenfantasys.com/tripl e-threat-lady-bug/adult-toys-dvds-21279
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Georgia59

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Joined: 11 Apr 2007
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Location: Along the Mississippi, USA
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Posted: 05-30-07 10:46am

I don't think that for the first two months that I had sex I had many orgasms.... We were still living with our parents so the few times we went away together or snuck it in while no onewas home it wasn't that great Smile Maybe it's something like that, or maybe just because you are new to sex you are still working on figuring out how to be comfortable wtith it or how to be emotionally comfortable with it..

I think the advice I have heard most often is to try and enjoy sex without really putting pressure on an orgasm... so you can learn to let go and enjoy sex. Or make sure you spend a lot of time on foreplay.... A lot!! Like 15 minutes at least before you even start sex.... this will make sure you are good and relaxed and you might even cum before you start having sex. .

Helpful at all??
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forever16

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 76

Posted: 05-31-07 11:49am

Same with me! I could almost feel it coming this one time but it didn't come. Confused
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aszalajka

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 May 2007
Posts: 103
Location: ,

Posted: 05-31-07 16:15pm

I have to have control in the bed room for me to cum. there are only 2 positions that my bf and i can do where i know im gonna have a orgsm. other than that if im not feeling greedy ill do what my boyfriend wants. which isnt much hes too shy to ask LOL
but i know it took me a long time to get to be able to have an orgsm every time i have sex and if im with a guy who isnt willing to work with meand hes being greedy that its pointless LOL
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MrsClark2007

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 31 May 2007
Posts: 5
Location: Cleveland

Posted: 05-31-07 18:49pm

Ive had the problem before. And I figured it out....clitoral stimulation helps but its also something that you cant think about too much. I found myself striving for the big O and couldnt get it...if you just let it happen it will....If you think about it too much it takes your mind off of the actual situation. But at the same time dont totally forget about it...just imagine the actual sex and try not to think too hard about it....good luck....P.S. I didnt reach my first big O until i was having intercourse for almost a year!!!!!!!!
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aburris87

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 24 Apr 2007
Posts: 9
Location: Freeport, IL

Posted: 05-31-07 19:28pm

thanks so much for all your input!
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fiona05

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Posted: 06-02-07 17:38pm

i totally understand this feeling you describe of being really close to orgasm and just losing it. i find that when i am that close to orgasm i need to completely let go (ie, stop thinking about what i look/sound like lol) and just concentrate really hard on what is happening in that moment - i need to get myself really turned on. once i do this i don't get that problem.

when you are having sex it is easy sometimes to just see it as something commonplace, and you don't get totally into it; perhaps your mind wanders. if you really focus on the fact you have having sex, and get carried away in the moment i'm sure it will happen for you!
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