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mina
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Feb 2004
Posts: 7
Location: london, england
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Uk Abortion...
Posted: 02-22-04 19:16pm
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I've recently discovered that i'm
pregnant. I know from reading some of the
other posts that some of you are very much
against abortion. Please do not judge me
and start telling me not to have an
abortion, please respect my decision, I am
here to find advice. Let me say that I
have not yet decided to have an abortion,
I am trying to find out as much
information as I possibly can before I
make a final decision.
I'm 18 and have just started university.
The father of my child and I are not
together as a couple, we just slept
together on a one night (drunken) stand,
although we are still in contact as we are
quite good friends and socialise with the
same people. I'm roughly, by my own
calculations, about 10-12 weeks pregnant.
There couldn't be any other worse time to
fall pregnant. I've just started getting
my life on track, and my family are irish
catholic (need I say more?). I'm yet to
tell the father, but i'm pretty sure he
won't want anything to do with me or this
baby. I'm not trying to offer any kind
of justification for having/not having
this baby, in my mind I don't need to
justify anything to anyone.
What i'm looking for is as much
information and/or advice as possible.
I've researched the methods (gruesome as
they may seem) and I need to know where
the procedure would take place (in the
uk). Would it be done in a special
abortion clinic or in my local nhs
hospital? Would I have to be referred to
hospital by my gp? How long would I
roughly have to wait for the actual
appointment? Will I have to stay
overnight in hospital or will I be able to
leave soon after the procedure? Thanks
for any advice and for not judging.
Remember: I have not decided to have an
abortion, I am finding out as much
information as possible, while I assess
the situation and all the other options.
And of course, I need to tell the father,
which i'm doing tomorrow. Eeek!
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sparklypixie12
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Sep 2003
Posts: 3099
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Posted: 02-24-04 18:43pm
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Im biting my tongue so hard not to say too
much.......
I am irish catholic too and yeah I know
we're strict but our families wont abandon
us-they are meant to be there for us in
our times of need so perhaps you shud tell
urs.
So...I guess you dont practice your
religion based on how your baby was
conceived & what you plan to do but
thats ur caca I guess
so...U know how the baby will be aborted
right? U will have counselling to see if
your emotionally up to it.Im not 100% sure
but you will probably be in as a day case
in a clinic cos I dont think this will be
a medical termination (using drugs) but
you may be in overnight if you have
surgery cos you need monitoring.Marie
stopes in london may be somewhere you go
but ur gp will tell ya.
Have you considered adoption? Its just
something else to consider.
I suggest in the future that you go on the
pill, use condoms and refrain from getting
so p I s s e d that you dont think of
these things.You know that makes sense so
u cant slag me off for suggesting it!!
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mina
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Feb 2004
Posts: 7
Location: london, england
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Posted: 02-24-04 19:37pm
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Thanks for biting your tongue, it was very
much appreciated. 
so if I do decide to go ahead with a
termination, it will be done in an actual
abortion clinic, not my locl hospital?
Do I pay for it? Me and the father are
going to be talking about all the options
(adoption is definately still an
option).
You see the problem is, I was on the pill.
D'ya reckon I can sue mycrogynon? I
know, it's no laughing matter. Thanks
for all your help again
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sparklypixie12
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Sep 2003
Posts: 3099
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Posted: 02-25-04 10:06am
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Yeah-my tongue hurts! Lol!
I am on those pills! We're up using it
properly? Like never got sick on them or
had diahhoroea (cant spell-u know what I
mean...The caca s!!) but I mean even using
it correctly theres a 1% failure rate.
Please consider adoption huni cos its not
as 'final' is it?
If you went to somewhere like marie
stopes-you would pay.A lot. But it could
be 'done' on the nhs because of it being
the early stages but then again,i think
you may have to have a medical abortion.Im
not too sure.Dont be too hasty in your
decision-either way its a decision for
life.
Liz
p.S. Check ur pm's-i sent u one
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mina
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Feb 2004
Posts: 7
Location: london, england
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Posted: 02-25-04 12:29pm
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Thanks alot again 
i'm going to the father's tonight for a
full discussion of what to do..... I'll
let you know what we're doing. *crosses
fingers*
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sparklypixie12
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Sep 2003
Posts: 3099
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Posted: 02-25-04 12:35pm
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No probs.Please think carefully about what
you're going to do and let me know.I hope
he's a supportive guy
liz
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KissyBai912
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Aug 2003
Posts: 1762
Location: Venice, Florida
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Posted: 02-25-04 13:26pm
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I hope he's a supportive guy too. I
really do hope that you give adoption a
lot of thought though. It's just that
abortion seems to tragic and final. It
makes me wanna cry. Especially since if
you wanted too, you could hear your sweet
little babie's heartbeat right now. I
understand that this is not a good time in
your life to have children but please
please please truly think this through.
Think of everyone it could or would
affect. The baby, you, the father, your
family, his family, and maybe, if you gave
the baby up for adoption, you could make
two people the happiest they have ever
been. I don't know much about abortions
in the uk but I still really want you to
think this through. But best of luck in
whatever you decide. 
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mina
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Feb 2004
Posts: 7
Location: london, england
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Posted: 02-27-04 13:53pm
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Ok....
So I told the father on monday and at
first he was a bit "oh caca". So we
decided that I would stay at his last
night to discuss what we should do.
After alot of talking we've decided to
keep the baby. And when I say "keep the
baby", I mean keep it, not give it up for
adoption. I'm gonna be a mummy :d we've
worked everything out and he seems really
pleased. We've decided we don't want to
become a couple just for the sake of the
baby, but he does want to be a full time
dad, not just a part time one, so we're
going to discuss finding a flat together
so he can be with his son/daughter all the
time. We're both going to take a gap
year from uni to try and make some money
and his family are quite well off so he's
quite confident his parents will help out.
We just have to tell everyone now. Oh
dear!
I can't believe how well he's taken it.
He keeps touching my belly all the time.
Crazy guy. The cutest thing was last
night he woke me up and said he couldn't
sleep becasue he couldn't stop thinking
about what a good daddy he's going to be.
Awwww. So there we are. I've stopped
drinking and smoking, but i'm slightly
nervous about a scan becasue between the
time of conception and when I found out I
was pregnant I had drunk quite alot of
alcohol and i'm scared about what effect
that will have on the baby. *crosses
fingers*
i just wanted to thank everyone for all
the support they gave me. *big hugs*.
All the best
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sammisa
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 16 Jan 2004
Posts: 250
Location: Washington, State
Thanks: 1
Thanked:0
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Posted: 02-27-04 14:42pm
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Oh im sooooo happy for you >. Thank
you for deciding upon that!! Seee .. He
wasn't upset  oh
man.. I just wish I could hug ya through
the computer... Welllll, I have 4
children of my own, and I almost lost one
when he was only 9 months old, so it
really hurts me to the point of tears when
I hear someone wants to have an abortion,
plus feeling the baby kicking inside of
you is the best feeling you will ever have
!!! You should be feeling that in a
couple of weeks if you aren't already..
Oh im sooo excited for you .. Good luck
to you !!!!!
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rach16
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Jan 2004
Posts: 78
Location: Scotland
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Posted: 02-27-04 16:44pm
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Hi nice to c another londoner on here! I
never judge anyway one anyway people do
things for a reason. Where bouts r u
from?I still aint decided on what im doing
but my situation is complicated. If you
wana chat just pm k
chat to you soon
rachel xx
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2ferano
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Dec 2003
Posts: 3717
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Posted: 02-27-04 17:54pm
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I am so happy for you! U r going to be a
mommy. Good decision!
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sparklypixie12
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Sep 2003
Posts: 3099
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Posted: 02-27-04 17:59pm
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Oh my gosh! I feel so happy for you! You
have done the right thing & im so
happy things turned out well with the
father-he sounds great!
You both obviously are gonna put so much
effort into this-taking a gap year both
sounds like a good idea.
Im sure your parents will be fine after
the initial shock & im sure they'll be
delighted that the two of you are making a
go of being good parents.
So,congratulations mommy!
Keep me updated by pm's or u have my email
addy
liz x
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KissyBai912
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Aug 2003
Posts: 1762
Location: Venice, Florida
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Posted: 03-02-04 12:36pm
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Oh my gosh!!! Yay! I am soooooooo
happy! I sound like a complete flake but
I really am!!! I promise you won't
regret your decision the first time you
hear the heartbeat, or feel your little
angel (or in my case linebacker haha)
kick. And when you get to hold them for
the first time (i get to do in about 19
days) oh goodness......*claps hands* I
hate doing laundry but I am on my 3rd load
for this boy....He should have about 5
loads maybe 6 altogether and I am actually
enjoying it all! I put his swing together
all by myself! Lol. I promise this won't
sound so idiotic when your baby is close
to being here you will get so excited and
just feel the need to clean clean clean!
Lol......Oh goodness I am so happy for
you! Well, enough babbling on my part I
think. Good luck to you and let us know
what's happening with you and baby! Maybe
you should come over to the teen pregnancy
forum if you haven't already? The girls
there are really nice I promise! Goodbye
for now!
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sparklypixie12
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Sep 2003
Posts: 3099
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Posted: 03-02-04 18:05pm
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I was so happy too chrissy-its great for
her :d
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