We had just gone for a 5 night holiday in a phuket resort, enjoying it with my husband and 20month old daughter. I was 11.5 weeks pregnant at the time, and had just had my birthday 4 days prior. Had a lovely time while we were there.
After returning home, we went for a routine 12 week scan, when my OB told me there was a prblem and that our baby's heart had stopped beating. Judging from the size and development of the baby, he felt that it had only stopped very recently, likely a few days. This would have been whilst we were on holiday.
I needed and ERPC which is the removal of the baby from my uterus through a suction procedure and dialation of my cervix. My husband felt we should do it the very night we found out, in hopes that I could get it over with and to start the new day as a new beginning.
However, I cannot get out of my mind, the questions as to why this would happen. I admit I was not 100% as strict as my first pregnancy, but I would say at least 90%. I had 1 pc of squid sushimi from the hotel buffet, and I asked them to reheat the lamb so that it was better cooked. I had a warm bath in the big tub of our villa, but was aware that I had not broken sweat on my forehead and made sure I was only in the tub for a short period. (i'm told you can't sit in saunas or elevate your body heat for fear of complications). I slipped on the wet bathroom floor, but i landed softely on my bum. More shocked then hurt. And I did sit with my back against the jet sprays that some pools have to massage your back...but i'm sure for only a few minutes. I took my daughter down a 20ft waterslide into shallow water but was not in any pain.
Though I'm not sure I want the answer to be yes, could any of the above have caused my baby's heart to have stopped? I would have thought (before this happened) that they are well cushioned within my womb. My doctor had even said this.
I also asked my OB, if I had come earlier for a scan, could we have prevented this. But even he said, unless there were any major problems in which case he'd investigate deeper, he would imagine, he'd see a healthy baby and give us the stamp of good health and let us go until the next scan.
I"m not sure anyone can help me through the anguish I feel now, however, I'm desparate to fall pregnant again. It is too painful for me to discuss with my friends and I can't stop feeling guilty.
