Yes I went through the same sort of things. A lot of things change after you go through menopause. I found a few things that might help you understand.
There are things you can take for this. I would consult your Doc.
Menopausal women are now understood to be as female as they ever were. Most women who are experiencing menopause take it upon themselves to continue their sexual life. Yet, many menopausal women face a lot of problems on the sexual front. Having to deal with mood swings, hot flashes, depression, and vaginal dryness that makes sex painful – it’s no wonder many menopausal women seem to loose their interest in sex. However, it is important to know that you are not alone. A lot can be done to help you increase your libido and feel more comfortable with your changing body.

Causes of Decreased Sex Drive
During menopause, sex drive can drop to very low levels. Some women find they don’t think about sex nearly as much as they used to before menopause. Others find they want to have sex, but just aren’t enjoying it enough to make it worth the effort. Decreased libido is thought to be due to lowered levels of estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone present in your body during menopause.

Each of these hormones has a specific role to play in making you experience sexual desire. Estrogen helps you to feel heightened sensitivity during sexual intercourse. Progesterone keeps your libido up. Testosterone, a male sex hormone, boosts sexual desire and lubricates your vagina. When these hormones drop, so does your overall desire for sexual intercourse.

The symptoms that come along with menopause often don’t make you feel much like having sex either. Just a few of the symptoms that may be decreasing your libido or causing you to avoid sex include:

Vaginal Dryness
Vaginal dryness, a common complaint of menopausal and perimenopausal women, can make your vagina too delicate to handle penetration. Declining estrogen levels prevent increased blood flow from traveling to your pelvis. The result is the thinning of your vaginal walls, and less lubrication during sex. Intercourse can range from uncomfortable to extremely painful, and can even cause spotting or light bleeding. Many women simply cannot feel the desire for sex because of painful intercourse in menopause.

Fatigue
Constantly having to deal with hot flashes, night sweats, and insomnia can leave you feeling very tired and irritable. When you are this fatigued, the last thing you probably want to do is have sex.

Mood Swings and Depression
Constant mood swings can make it difficult to plan sex in advance, or get into sex while it’s happening. You may feel up to sex one minute, but you may be completely against it the next. Many menopausal women also suffer from mild or major depression. Feelings of guilt, unhappiness, and frustration can really cause your libido to drop. Certain antidepressants can also result in a lowered sex drive.

Self-Image
Self-image is often a major factor in a woman’s sex drive. If you feel uncomfortable with the way your body has changed during menopause, you may not be willing or able to share physical intimacy with someone else. Incontinence, weight gain, and changes in your skin and breasts can all affect the way you feel about your sexuality. Women who have undergone surgical menopause often have a very difficult time accepting their new bodies.

Sentia pills work great. They increase sex drive.

last time for me was very painful also what do i do, thought something was wrong with me. have made appointment for gyne dr.

can you get a prescription for the estrogen patch?
I have it and it works wonders.
I had surgical menopause and tried to get thru the symtoms of menopause without turning to an HRT. But, I suffered horribly and was literally wasting away to nothing. My dr took one look at me who was covering for my regular dr. after post op and she immedialtely put me on the estrogen patch.
I haven't suffered since.
It is now 2 yrs and I don't even feel like i"m in menopause.

it's the most natural form of estrogen compared to the pill forms of estrogen that aren't. they're very expensive but worth it.

good luck,
L

Maria,
i'm leery about trying herbs becasue they're not FDA approved and anyone can say it works and make it sound fantastic, which makes a person who is in need of help try anything.
If Maca is said to be so good, then why aren't doctors around the globe telling their patients about it?
see what I'm getting at?
I once read something a while back that a company come up with a product, say for losing weight, it will state it has this new found stuff in it to help burn fat cells, so when the FDA did a test on it, they found out the claimed herb DID in fact have the amount of things in it, but only a very minute amount. they can get away with claiming it has a specific product in it because it does, but it doesnt have to say there's only like 1% of the specific product in it.
it would have to be tons of this specific compound to burn the fat cells in this claimed diet pill. they don't mention that on the back of the bottle.
they don't have to.
so all these innocent people who want to lose weight so bad, will pay the astrinomical fee's believing that the product really works because of the amount of money that was paid to put into the advertising campaign.
that's why I'm so leary about people and advertisments about supplemnts and products that aren't FDA approved.
If one of my friends were to take the product and tell me to my face it works, then I might consider trying it.
I wish it were so simple to just take a supplment to give us sex drive.
wouldn't that be a million dollar seller on the market?

This is a very nice description about menopause and the information you produced is absolutely correct .Decline in the levels of estrogen ,progesterone are mainly responsible for decrease in sexual desire .I think these can be replaced by HRT..

Hi ladies,
I just found this forum. I know exactly how you all feel. There is hope!!!

I'm 54 with a total hysterectomy 20 years ago. I've been through the gamut of hrt. I moved to AZ and in finding a new gyn, found a doctor going through menopause. She does bioidentical hormone pellets (and has them herself). They are implanted in my hip and last 3-4 months. They are the best! I get estrogen and testosterone. My body only uses what it needs and they are closest to what we make naturally. My life has changed drastically for the better with regards to menopause and libido. Almost like being on newlyweds again! I hopefully will have these till I die!

Don't give up!

sex during menopause will be painful and I too suffered with that.I have applied some progesterone creams and undergone some natural medication with good effect.

You might mot experience any menopausal symptoms but you might be experiencing with vaginal dryness and this is mainly responsible for lack of sexual desire.Better use some creams for it.

I too have found that when I have sex it burns.....ouch!
Never did that when I was young and first married.I'm 55 now and I recently found that it would burn.It's wet in that area, but still burns.I can't take HRT so i would imagine I can't use any of those creams either. Am I right? Any help would be appreciated,thanks gals

Thanks but, are you the only one who answers to these posts? just wondering.I tried some of those, some actually burn more....OUCH !! even my husband is like "What the h--, that burns"!!!!haha
Are you a RN or med.prof?