I have recently been confirmed has having this condition.
The tearing is a classic symptom, and is not phimosis as you rightly thought.
What you may be suffering with is the early stages of;
LICHEN SCLEROSUS.
This is a rare skin condition, that mainly affects women.
The tearing over time causes scarring that makes pulling the foreskin back even harder to do, and the skin becomes very fragile.
You DON'T need a circumsion (thank goodness!)
What you need is to go to your GP and explain that yo need a TOPICAL STEROID, such as Betnovate, or Derovate.
DON'T use soap or shower gel, get some Dermol 200 from the chemist, this will also act as a lubricant to haelp you.
I will tell you more later.