I refused an episiotomy. I didn't know how large, or small, my daughter was going to be. But regardless, I refused to be cut.

I, in a fit of anger (because this other Dr. was saying she was going to have to do an episiotomy) *dared* her to cut me. that "I didn't have an epidural, and I *would* walk out if she came close to me with that blade."

It's your choice. The only time, I believe, an episiotomy should be performed is if the baby's heart rate is dropping quickly.

You heal faster with tearing, as opposed to being cut.

I only had 1 stitch. And if she would have performed the episiotomy, I would have *def* needed more.

Sarah

i ended up with an emergency c-section but before that i had made it known that i would rather tear naturally and they should only cut me if it was entirely necessary. i'd researched it a bit and everything i found said you heal better from a tear rather than a cut.

(this is all based on what ive been told or heard, i havent been through labor/delivery yet)

not only is it easier and better to heal from a tear but having an epesiatomy makes a tear worse it doesnt stop you from tearing

the instructor at my "childbirth class" explained it like this...its like a shirt thats too small...if you try to put it on it will either stretch over your head or the fabric will rip a little bit, but if you cut your shirt to fit your head you get a much worse rip in the fabric and if you dont cut it enough then you get a bad rip because the cut keeps on ripping

does that make any sence? the lady explained it much much better

~alicia~

it does make sense.

Dr.s tend to cut *too much*! Then you end up with unecessary stitches.

It really depends on how much your Dr. respects you and your decisions.

Sarah

yep i got cut from the cooter to the pooter!

omg ...i haven't been able to uncross my legs since I read that

If you plan to tear, let me give you a piece of advice I wish .i'd known before I gave birth.

Unless your baby's heartrate is dropping or there are other signs that your baby is in distress, do not allow the nurses and/or doctor to rush you in pushing your baby out. "pushpushpushpush" and "harder!" are prime examples. If your child isn't in immediate danger, there's no reason for you to rush in pushing. The pressure of your child's head being "right there" will be hard to deal with, but it will also allow your vagina to stretch and might reduce your chances of tearing.

I tell you this because I pushed my daughter out in 9 minutes when she had no distress at all, and I tore wide open. My tear did not heal correctly and the scar tissue makes doing simple things, like making love with my husband, difficult and painful.

Just keep that in mind.

I know I keep mentioning this book, honestly I don't sell them myself or anything, but in the book birthing from within they mention a lot of stuff they don't tell you anywhere else. Like pushing on your own and ignoring the doctor and nurses telling you to "pushpushpush". It makes sense now that I've read it that you should be the one deciding when to push and taking minimal guidance from people who can't feel what you're feeling. They also often make you hold your breath and push for 10 seconds at a time and in that book they say that you should really only push for 5 seconds or so most of the time because holding your breath can cause you to lose oxygen which is bad for the baby. I guess midwives would know a lot of these things and would also massage and stretch the perineum while you are resting and pushing. Before I read that I would have assumed that I should only listen to the doctor and push when they tell me to. Now I feel a little more confident that maybe I can go at my own pace if I feel like pushing slower. I guess it's also dependent on whether you have an epidural or not and how numb you are down there while pushing. Maybe that's why the doctors feel like they have to tell you when to push because a lot of women can't feel what's going on during the pushing stage(??). Which is just another reason to try to go natural. I really wish I could've gotten a midwife but there aren't enough to go around where I live and they are all booked up. I'm hoping that hiring a doula will help give me that little extra bit of strength and confidence that I can do it without drugs (if I'm lucky enough to have a choice in the matter.)

My tear did not heal correctly and the scar tissue makes doing simple things, like making love with my husband, difficult and painful



geez I'm sorry to hear that happened to you. Is there some way you can have that fixed?

you can do it drug free. Believe that. it's something you do for yourself, and for noone else.

It's the most rewarding feeling to know that you did what your body was meant to do for millions of years, without the aid of medicne.

Once you make it past the transition stage, you're rounding 3rd base. Once you're pushing, think of it as sliding into home plate!

I promise you, the baby coming out doesn't hurt like you would think. Your vagina is so numb from the baby crowning, that you don't feel it. it burns regardless, but it's not an overwhelming sensation of stinging and burning. These words make me cringe by the way! lol!

If you want any more info about a totally drug free birth, feel free to pm me.

I plan on having my next child at home. Or in a birthing tub. But I'd prefer to be home.

Sarah

If I really wanted to, I could go and have a corrective surgery done. I'm not comfortable with the idea, so .i'm trying to deal with the situation without medical intervention as much as possible: Continuing to have sex (with a lot of lube!), perineal massage, etc.

It does make me nervous about my next birth, though. If .i'm having trouble fitting my husband's penis in there, I don't want to think about a child's head/shoulders.

I had one with my first son he weighed 8lbs 9oz and I tore with my second son he weighed 7lbs 12oz and with my third I didnt tear or have an episiotomy and he was 8lbs 10oz. I healed the best with my second son. I could actualy sit on my butt after he was born unlike after the episiotomy.I guess I will find out what will happen this time in a few weeks but I do not want to have another episiotomy.

i have been afraid of having to have an episiotomy...

i had a tear with my son, i went natural, and it like the other lady said, it burns when when the head is coming out but after all the contraction pains and the whole pushing stage and everything it's not as bad as you may think. it hurts!! but it's nice to be able to feel what's going on.

i am 34weeks now and i am so afraid of having to have an episiotomy for whatever reason, i hope i don't have one. i was able to sit down after having my son, without being in major pain. i know some women who have had episiotomies and can't say the same.

With my first child, the Dr was about to perform the episiotomy (I didn't have the epidural, so my Dr numbed me and told me to push while he cut, but my daughter popped right out before he cut. Needless to say I was given the local in my Hoo Ha for no reason, which hurt like a mother. I ended up tearing and got a couple of stitches (I guess the local wasn't for no reason )

With my other kids, I insisted that the Dr stretch and massage and I didn't tear and need an episiotomy with them. I definitely think that the stretching and massaging plays a big part in whether or not you will need an episiotomy.
Good luck

I had an episiotomy and it was fine. The doctor ended up stitching me back up to the point I was like a virgin. I have heard many horror stories regarding episiotomies but I wasn't one of them. I would opt for one again if I knew the experience would be like last time. I only pushed four times and he was out. I don't know if my episiotomy had something to do with that.

Do the doctors still stitch if you tear and don't have an episiotomy?? Curious.

I also had an episiotomy without any problems afterward. I had been pushing for an hour before the dr cut me and it was a medium sized cut. After that, my 10 lb baby boy slid right on out. Healing was painful, but bearable.

yepp. I had "one running stitch". It went slightly down one side, across, and slightly up the other side.

I was giving a numbing spray and was sitting indian style in about 3 days.

The Dr. massaged and stretched my vagina before her head came out. (which, without any drugs, wasn't the most *fun* experience...I just pushed through the pain)!

My new Dr. said he doesn't believe in episiotomies, so I should be in the good for this baba too!!

Sarah

I regret agreeing to the episiotomy. I just went along with the midwives. It was so painful and sore to sit down for weeks afterwards. The stitches took forever and the needle hurt that kept going in to (supposedly) numb it. Never again! (hopefully!)

Morgan