Eating Disorders Forum - Crazy Symptoms & Update.

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Q: Crazy Symptoms & Update.

asked by: Kayla343 on April 23rd, 2007

New User

Ive been pretty messed up with my eating habits for over a year now.. and its just getting worse. but what do you expect.

would a fasting/binging/purging cycle cause me to be
-tired
-dizzy
-have shortness in breath (after going up 3 flights of stairs WALKING i can't breath... its so weird)
-BAD anxiety problems
-not being able to pay attention
-losing interest in everything
-and i jump on everyone. they could say the smallest thing and ROARR.. i go off on them.

a lot of people say im not myself anymore.. im just not happy.

is this like depression or just part of my ed?
its so confusing. but im going to the doctor this week to get some meds for my anxiety or something. i can't take it. i just dont want to get rid of my ed. although i wish i could just praise my body instead of hating it and just wanting to kill it.

im 16, 5'3, and weigh around 107 right now.
to me.. i'd rather be murdered because thats just insanely high.

i know i need help but i cant bring myself to it.
about 3 months ago i was so over the edge i almost got help.. but i backed out and didn't do it. but now my grades are suffering like crazy.. and i dont mean to brag or anything but i have a 4.6 GPA.. and its dropping rapidly and im still trying. it's just the lack of interest now.

anyone talking to me or posting back would be appreciated. If you want to talk on aim.. send me a pm or something. i just need support because this is getting hard to do on my own. especially hiding it.

my boyfriends mom is a freaking NURSE so she can tell im up to something. she asked him if i ate when we went out.. and he said "Yeah i Suppose.." I went out to brunch with his family for Easter a few weeks ago and i did eat.. but i eat really slow and dont eat THAT much so it probably didnt look too good on my part.. but what can i do. i just cant help it! He said that he thinks she suspects the hatred i have toward myself because it comes across very noticable. It's that lack of self confidence rising through. i hateeeee it.

thoughts, support.. anything greatly appreciated. <3
sorry i havent posted in such a longgg time.

just been busy.

Replies(6)

hawkeye69

replied on April 24th, 2007

New User

It sounds like you have depression and anxiety along with the eating disorder. Keep your doctor appointment and get help. Also admit the eating disorder. It won't get any better if you don't get help now! You have to learn to love yourself which takes awhile with good therapy. Don't ruin your grades and your future over this. I work in a middle school and I have seen this before. Being super skinny isn't worth losing out on a terrific future. Good luck on your appointment! Smile

v00d00cita

replied on April 24th, 2007

Active User, very eHealthy

Kayla,

you that killing yourself is not going to bring yourself happiness nor satisfaction. You won't be a better person for being skinny. It's the opposite way: you'll be checked up more frequently, get controlled by lots of people - people you don't even think that would imagine you suffer from an ed -, you'll feel worse, you'll die.

Get help, yes, and leave your ed. You can do it and you'll feel better.
Those sympthoms you described were much alike what I was suffering from some months ago.

Good luck, and give us some news

Kayla343

replied on April 24th, 2007

New User

Yes i know i dont gain anything from all of this.. im just hoping that maybe ill like myself better and find a new confidence in myself when im skinnier.

but i went to the doctor today and he prescribed me zoloft. we'll see how that works and what that does to me. hopefully it gives me some confidence and stuff.

the zoloft should help my depression as well as my anxiety. ill keep you guys posted though throughout the process :]

thanks for the support and concern

v00d00cita

replied on April 28th, 2007

Active User, very eHealthy

Kayla,

You're already skinny. If you didn't gain confidence in yourself until now, getting skinnier, why keep on doing this? Those are clear signs that your body is asking for help asap and that that is not the way...
You must nourish yourself, treat yourself right.
You'll find conficence in yourself in other ways, really.
:*

Kayla343

replied on April 29th, 2007

New User

i just dont feel skinny. and when i look at myself, im totally disgusted at what i see.. i mean, when people laugh in general, i think theyre laughing at how fat i am and stuff. its crazy i know.. i just cant help it.

i want to be happy the way i am, but its just like impossible. im not at dangerous weights or anything and i haven't purged since last november. im alright.

v00d00cita

replied on April 30th, 2007

Active User, very eHealthy

Look, nothing is impossible!
And you are skinny already. You gotta start believing in what people tell you.. :*

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