Having Trouble Choosing a Form of Bc

Getting married end of May...tried the Nuvaring (I have never been on any hormonal meds and prefer not taking a lot of medication). I wanted something effective...ended up with 2 anxiety attacks in the first week and all of the bad side effects people claimed. I know it takes some adjusting to but I would have called off the wedding in the meantime! People either seem to have horrible reactions or it works really well for them.

My doctor and girlfriends recommended the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" by Toni Weschler. Order it on Amazon today (it will take a bit to read)! It is a tool for getting pregnant but also for not. It the Family Awareness Method (NOT the Rhythm method) but will definitely give you and her peace of mind if you decide to do something other than hormonal. There are a lot of misconceptions out there (like you are fertile day 14) which are simply not always true and the book is an enormous education - very easy to read. I plan on using it along with a diaphragm. I will know exactly when I'm fertile and when not so I can double up on protection if needed and not worry.

It sounds perfect for someone like you who cares about your fiance's health and is willing to be proactive and research options. This book will help you make and educated choice!

I'm not really good at giving you advice but here's a few things I thought might help you decide.

You mentioned about using sponges/spermicide i guess along w/ a condom? This is a good type of birthcontrol, that doesn't require medication of any sort, but there are possible side effects. If your fiance uses spermicide too often, she has a higher risk of getting something like urinary tract infections and other kinds of STI's.

My friend who is on the nuvaring said that it's actually a really good birthcontrol method. i'm not really sure though, what kind of horror stories have you heard?

Have you thought about the patch? or the low-dose version of the pill? You seem to oppose the intake of medications? Is there a specific reason?

I tihnk there are many side effects to every birth control method, the main thing is to make the best choice and not regret. I would suggest the low-dose version of the pill.

This is my personal experience...all people are different though. I was on pills for many years until I got tired of mood swings and weight gain, then I was on the Nuva Ring. I got pregnant while on the Nuva Ring and had a miscarriage, so the doctor upped my "dose" of it by making it so I only have 4 periods a year. Upping it made me extremely psychotic and I lost almost a quarter of my hair. The only good thing I can say about it was that it was "easy" because I didn't have to deal with maintaining a pill schedule. I finally got sick of all the hormone junk and got an IUD put in. The IUD I have is the NON-hormonal PARAGUARD (not Mirena). The doctor who put it in was a very careless jerk to be honest...he did not check the positioning of my uterus and it caused him to lightly "scrape" my insides while inserting which caused a lot of pain and such heavy bleeding I almost had to go to the emergency room. The first month was very painful and bloody but after then everything has been paradise. Some women complain of cramps and heavier periods but my periods are now next to nothing and I only get small cramps that go away quick and require no pain meds...

I was on the Depo shot for five years. Then I heard that the FDA said it is not recommended for young people or for anyone to take for more than two years except as a last resort.

For the past couple of years, I have been avoiding hormonal birth control altogether. I have been using condoms and spermicide with no problems at all. No broken condoms, no accidental pregnancy, no infection, no irritation.

I'm on a pill that I love right now. No side effects whatsoever. There are a lot of really good options, all of them have possible side effects. Even non-hormonal ones have side effects. Spermicides have never agreed with me. Also, the nuva ring is hormonal. What do you have against hormonal birth control? It is defintely true that there are lots of possible side effects and a lot of them really really suck (trust me, I've tried lots of things), but most people find one that suits them just fine eventually. It's great that you are so involved in this with your wife, but I am thinking that the two of you need to get more info from a gynocologist and not the internet!!!

Anyway, there is the copper IUD which is non-hormonal and really effective. If you are so against using hormones, (which is a fine choice, just as long as it's an informed one) it is a good semi-long term effective option. But it has possible side effects as well.

Think about it this way, a woman's hormones are fluctuating all throughout her cycle, reacting to eachother via negative feedback. When she is on birth control, the only change is that her natural fluctuations are controlled and she experiences even levels throughout the month. As long as you find a fomulation that works right to control your hormone levels, you shouldn't experience nasty side effects. I am not saying that this doesn't happen, and I have definately had lots of side effects, just that you should try and find what works for you. Once I found the right pill, I was in heaven.

Anyway, not trying to sound reprimanding or anything. I just think it is a little strange when people are afraid of putting hormones into their body. Your body naturally gives you crazy hormone swings!! Why not try and control it?

You were 100% correct when you said that most people online talking about birth control are doing it because they had nasty side effects. The people that dealt with it just fine are under-represented. If you really want my experiences----

On spermicides and condoms, I had horrible irritation and pain.
On the nuvaring, I was wonderful for a year until the very end when I started getting irritation and pain during sex.
On the mirena IUD, I gained 20 lbs and had horrible cramps, moodiness, and acne for the whole 7 months until I got it taken out.
Now I'm on Lo-estrin. I love it. I am slowly losing my IUD weight, and am much happier.

But based on that, I would not advise anyone for or against any of those options. I loved nuvaring for a long time, it was really easy and I had no side effects until the very end. The IUD was great because it was foolproof and I never had any pregnancy anxiety. It's all just a matter of how it works for you (or in this case, your wife) personally.

Sorry for the long post!!