Medical Questions > Mens Health > Sexual Health - Men Forum

Need Advice, Help, Guidance. Never Cummed......

Must Read
Talking openly about the penis is a very personal matter. Learn basic penis anatomy to discuss penile disorders accurately with your doctor....
Penis symptoms that interfere with sexual activity or urination could be serious. Learn the signs and symptoms of penis problems that require a doctor's help....
How do urologists evaluate and diagnose painful penis? A penis disorder is a medical problem. Learn more about possible diagnoses for penis disorders now....
Okay, well I am 24 years old. And I have had sex with several partners many times. But I have never to my knowledged cummed inside any of them, never. It's not that I don't want to it's just that I either can't or just don't. I masterbate and cumm during that when I do it to myself but find myself not being able to cum in a girl.

I also noticed during sex that my penis although it feels good during sex but it seems to get numb, numb to the point that getting a hand job or oral sex doesn't really do that much for me. It's like I can't really feel it to much. I was with my girlfriend visiting her for 3 days and we had sex about 6 times or so and not once did I cum, there was one time I felt like I was getting there but didn't happen. and the sex is great. We try all the positions and everything and I am so in love with her which makes it sad that I can't cum in her. I don't have a problem getting hard although so times i find myself getting hard then the stiffness dying off.

I'm just wondering if anyone else has any of these issues, I know my brother has the same problem with a girl he has been dating for a year.

If anyone knows or can relate to this issue please let me know.

Thank you so much.
Did you find this post helpful?
|

replied March 22nd, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Re: Need Advice, Help, Guidance. Never Cummed......
Shadowless wrote:
Okay, well I am 24 years old. And I have had sex with several partners many times. But I have never to my knowledged cummed inside any of them, never. It's not that I don't want to it's just that I either can't or just don't. I masterbate and cumm during that when I do it to myself but find myself not being able to cum in a girl.

I also noticed during sex that my penis although it feels good during sex but it seems to get numb, numb to the point that getting a hand job or oral sex doesn't really do that much for me. It's like I can't really feel it to much. I was with my girlfriend visiting her for 3 days and we had sex about 6 times or so and not once did I cum, there was one time I felt like I was getting there but didn't happen. and the sex is great. We try all the positions and everything and I am so in love with her which makes it sad that I can't cum in her. I don't have a problem getting hard although so times i find myself getting hard then the stiffness dying off.

I'm just wondering if anyone else has any of these issues, I know my brother has the same problem with a girl he has been dating for a year.

If anyone knows or can relate to this issue please let me know.

Thank you so much.


it sounds like a mental block, and not a physical thing. You are mentlaly afraid of orgasming inside of a girl. I can't tell you why; and you may not even know right now. But this sounds like something you need to mentally and emotionally deal with.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied March 22nd, 2007
Well I hope you are right. I don't know how to get over it or deal with it, i guess when you are having sex and thinking about it to much it messes with you.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied March 22nd, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Shadowless wrote:
Well I hope you are right. I don't know how to get over it or deal with it, i guess when you are having sex and thinking about it to much it messes with you.


That's exactly it. You can get therapy for sexual problems; you can also go look for some books and discuss things with your girlfriend.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied March 23rd, 2007
Another thing I have noticed is that after sex when I don't cum I get really sore. And I don't just mean blue balls sore. Like sometimes I can feel like the tubes in my left testi area and like see them when my skin is loose. I can even see the tubes/veins like when i suck in air and my testies move up and down. Sometimes I wonder if my tubes/veins are causing the pain like maybe it's chronic epidtymis (spelling)?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied March 23rd, 2007
Community Volunteer
Hmmm, there may be actually something physical going on here. Though you don't need to go into detail, are there any problems at all during masturbation? Anything?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied March 23rd, 2007
Stan Stepanic wrote:
Hmmm, there may be actually something physical going on here. Though you don't need to go into detail, are there any problems at all during masturbation? Anything?


No that's the thing no problems during self masturbation. Even after we would have sex a few times and she would go to class I would masturbate to get rid of the blue balls.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied March 23rd, 2007
Community Volunteer
I don't think this is psychological. It hardly sounds like you have a mental block if you're enjoying it and the symptoms seem too consistent to be mental. You may have something occuring that deals with pressure, the nerves in the penis and blood flow. However, I can find nothing on this in my materials. First off, alcohol can cause this as well as a medication, but the problem is you can do it otherwise. Here is a suggestion that should work. It will take pratice but this should do it. Practice fooling around in other ways, orally or manually with your girl, however, and then right before you're about to finish move to sexual intercouse and finish that way. If there is some mental block you're experiencing, this should eliminate that over time. Otherwise, if you notice a strange sensation when you insert the penis that almost feels like something is happening, it may be something physical, albeit strange.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied March 23rd, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Stan Stepanic wrote:
I don't think this is psychological. It hardly sounds like you have a mental block if you're enjoying it and the symptoms seem too consistent to be mental.


A mental block is a psychological problem. Psychology deals with the brain, which is your mind.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied March 23rd, 2007
Community Volunteer
Yeah, and what?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied March 23rd, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
I would talk to your doctor to rule out any physical problems. If the doctor says that you are healthy and should be ejaculating just fine, then you could look into therapy as things like that can be psychological.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied March 23rd, 2007
Experienced User
Re: Need Advice, Help, Guidance. Never Cummed......
Shadowless wrote:
Okay, well I am 24 years old. And I have had sex with several partners many times. But I have never to my knowledged cummed inside any of them, never. It's not that I don't want to it's just that I either can't or just don't. I masterbate and cumm during that when I do it to myself but find myself not being able to cum in a girl.

I also noticed during sex that my penis although it feels good during sex but it seems to get numb, numb to the point that getting a hand job or oral sex doesn't really do that much for me. It's like I can't really feel it to much. I was with my girlfriend visiting her for 3 days and we had sex about 6 times or so and not once did I cum, there was one time I felt like I was getting there but didn't happen. and the sex is great. We try all the positions and everything and I am so in love with her which makes it sad that I can't cum in her. I don't have a problem getting hard although so times i find myself getting hard then the stiffness dying off.

I'm just wondering if anyone else has any of these issues, I know my brother has the same problem with a girl he has been dating for a year.

If anyone knows or can relate to this issue please let me know.

Thank you so much.

I think your over whelmed wtih so many girls your doing it with?! Have you thought of just trying one girl for a chance. You can catch a dirty disease! Sorry, I'm against the whole thing about people being with more than one partner! Neutral
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied March 25th, 2007
Re: Need Advice, Help, Guidance. Never Cummed......
reneblack wrote:
Shadowless wrote:
Okay, well I am 24 years old. And I have had sex with several partners many times. But I have never to my knowledged cummed inside any of them, never. It's not that I don't want to it's just that I either can't or just don't. I masterbate and cumm during that when I do it to myself but find myself not being able to cum in a girl.

I also noticed during sex that my penis although it feels good during sex but it seems to get numb, numb to the point that getting a hand job or oral sex doesn't really do that much for me. It's like I can't really feel it to much. I was with my girlfriend visiting her for 3 days and we had sex about 6 times or so and not once did I cum, there was one time I felt like I was getting there but didn't happen. and the sex is great. We try all the positions and everything and I am so in love with her which makes it sad that I can't cum in her. I don't have a problem getting hard although so times i find myself getting hard then the stiffness dying off.

I'm just wondering if anyone else has any of these issues, I know my brother has the same problem with a girl he has been dating for a year.

If anyone knows or can relate to this issue please let me know.

Thank you so much.

I think your over whelmed wtih so many girls your doing it with?! Have you thought of just trying one girl for a chance. You can catch a dirty disease! Sorry, I'm against the whole thing about people being with more than one partner! Neutral


Well I have only been with one girl in the past year, and that has only been when we see each other and this girl is my one and only love so of course I don't sleep around.

I am hoping it's nothing serious, even after I materbate myself I notice alot of soreness like in my testies and the area under my testies that is going towards the butt, I guess maybe this is the colon area? I'm not sure.

As for the sex there was a time when we were having sex and she was on top and really going at it mostly towards the head of the penis area and I thought I was about to go but I don't think I did. I have a doctors appointment tomorrow luckily. Is there anything I should ask him?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied March 25th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
Re: Need Advice, Help, Guidance. Never Cummed......
reneblack wrote:

I think your over whelmed wtih so many girls your doing it with?! Have you thought of just trying one girl for a chance. You can catch a dirty disease! Sorry, I'm against the whole thing about people being with more than one partner! Neutral


Keep in mind that someone could sleep with 100 people, but that does not mean that they have a disease. A lot of people out there are disease-free. You can only catch something if you sleep with someone who has something, and even then, you can lessen your chances of getting it if you use a condom.

On the other hand, someone could sleep with one person and get a disease. Diseases don't care how many people you have been with. They do not just target people who have more than one partner. Most people have more than one partner in their life without getting any diseases.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied March 25th, 2007
Experienced User
How do you masturbate? In what position?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied March 25th, 2007
Experienced User
Re: Need Advice, Help, Guidance. Never Cummed......
Llewellyn wrote:
reneblack wrote:

I think your over whelmed wtih so many girls your doing it with?! Have you thought of just trying one girl for a chance. You can catch a dirty disease! Sorry, I'm against the whole thing about people being with more than one partner! Neutral


Keep in mind that someone could sleep with 100 people, but that does not mean that they have a disease. A lot of people out there are disease-free. You can only catch something if you sleep with someone who has something, and even then, you can lessen your chances of getting it if you use a condom.

On the other hand, someone could sleep with one person and get a disease. Diseases don't care how many people you have been with. They do not just target people who have more than one partner. Most people have more than one partner in their life without getting any diseases.

sorry but, I have morals. I respect my body. and I have one partner that I love. Smile
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied March 25th, 2007
Community Volunteer
The only thing I could say is to ask if it's possible pressure from sex is affecting your ability to ejaculate. It may be possible, and if so they can explain what you may need to do. Otherwise, the method I explained above should help.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied March 25th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
Re: Need Advice, Help, Guidance. Never Cummed......
reneblack wrote:

sorry but, I have morals. I respect my body. and I have one partner that I love. Smile


People with morals, people who respect their body, and people with only one partner whom they love can get STDs too.

You can have whatever morals you want and respect your body all you want. There's nothing wrong with that. However, when you come to a forum such as this one, you have to be aware that not everyone shares your moral view. You can't down them or imply that they are immoral, or don't respect their body just because they are different than you are.

The original poster never asked for our moral opinions of what he is doing. Do your morals just apply to sex or do you feel a moral obligation to be nice to people and not preach even if you do not agree with their lifestyle choice?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied March 25th, 2007
Experienced User
Re: Need Advice, Help, Guidance. Never Cummed......
Llewellyn wrote:
reneblack wrote:

sorry but, I have morals. I respect my body. and I have one partner that I love. Smile


People with morals, people who respect their body, and people with only one partner whom they love can get STDs too.

You can have whatever morals you want and respect your body all you want. There's nothing wrong with that. However, when you come to a forum such as this one, you have to be aware that not everyone shares your moral view. You can't down them or imply that they are immoral, or don't respect their body just because they are different than you are.

The original poster never asked for our moral opinions of what he is doing. Do your morals just apply to sex or do you feel a moral obligation to be nice to people and not preach even if you do not agree with their lifestyle choice?

You have your opinion. I have mine. My boyfriend is clean and we don't cheat. We love each other. Not trying to be rude but, are you planning to marry more than 6 people at the same time. I respect your opinion dude. Neutral
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied March 26th, 2007
Community Volunteer
Okay that's enough of this, off topic at this point.
|
Did you find this post helpful?