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Disappearing Bits Down Below? Tmi?

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Firstly, hello everyone.. I'm an extreme newbie (joined 5 minutes ago) so please be gentle with me! Laughing

I'd like to ask your advice/experience of something thats really been bothering me for ages now. About a year ago, I had noticed that my bits down there (clitoris, labia etc etc) seemed to be getting smaller & smaller. Hubby and I don't have a particularly 'active' sex life due to my being left disabled with my last pregnancy (I developed DSP, the more severe form of SPD during the pregnancy 5 yrs ago). As a result, I don;t know when this started to happen but I've a feeling that it's got something to do with the total hysterectomy that I had 3yrs ago (this was done in an attempt to sort the hormone side of my disability).

I finally plucked up the courage to ask my GP about it but as I can't be examined, she really didn't have a clue. Eventually, I was referred to a gynae and they gave me oestrogen (SP?) pessaries which I had been using for just under 6mths now.. Unfortunately there hasn't been any change though and if anything else it has become even smaller. Now, I don't know what the 'average' size is, but lets just say it wasn't difficult to find, especially when aroused (maybe pea size?) but now, it's almost inverted into the clitoral hood... Please don't laugh as this is really bothering me and I feel like a freak... Trying to have sex with my wonderful husband is difficult enough without throwing this into the mix too, and I'm only 35!!

Could anyone please, please help with this and give me advice on what to try?

Thanks for your time in reading this, I really do appreciate it.
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replied March 20th, 2007
Especially eHealthy
Re: Disappearing Bits Down Below? Tmi?
funkymomma wrote:
Firstly, hello everyone.. I'm an extreme newbie (joined 5 minutes ago) so please be gentle with me! Laughing

I'd like to ask your advice/experience of something thats really been bothering me for ages now. About a year ago, I had noticed that my bits down there (clitoris, labia etc etc) seemed to be getting smaller & smaller. Hubby and I don't have a particularly 'active' sex life due to my being left disabled with my last pregnancy (I developed DSP, the more severe form of SPD during the pregnancy 5 yrs ago). As a result, I don;t know when this started to happen but I've a feeling that it's got something to do with the total hysterectomy that I had 3yrs ago (this was done in an attempt to sort the hormone side of my disability).

I finally plucked up the courage to ask my GP about it but as I can't be examined, she really didn't have a clue. Eventually, I was referred to a gynae and they gave me oestrogen (SP?) pessaries which I had been using for just under 6mths now.. Unfortunately there hasn't been any change though and if anything else it has become even smaller. Now, I don't know what the 'average' size is, but lets just say it wasn't difficult to find, especially when aroused (maybe pea size?) but now, it's almost inverted into the clitoral hood... Please don't laugh as this is really bothering me and I feel like a freak... Trying to have sex with my wonderful husband is difficult enough without throwing this into the mix too, and I'm only 35!!

Could anyone please, please help with this and give me advice on what to try?

Thanks for your time in reading this, I really do appreciate it.


Why couldn't you be examined?

As for this... it does sound as if it is related to the complications with your pregnancy; but I have no knowledge of this or the abbreviations you used for your conditions so I'm pretty much unhelpful.
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replied March 20th, 2007
Re: Disappearing Bits Down Below? Tmi?
[quote="Eiri
Why couldn't you be examined? [/quote]

Hiya,

I can't be examined (well, I could if they knocked me out first) because (I'm sorry to be crude) I can't open my legs due to the condition that I have. It's known as Diastasis Symphysis Pubis and it's basically a complete separation of the symphysis pubis, which is the joint that runs on your pubic bone, this basically holds your pubic bone together and also keeps the rest of your pelvis girdle in check. When there is a separation like this, it casues extreme pain (and I mean extreme) with any/every movement, through both the pubic area and the SI joints. any form of weight baring (walking, going up/down steps etc etc is excrutiating) and any separation of the legs (trying to get in/out of the car or bed etc) also has the same effect. This is why I don't know when this started to happen as hubby and I only 'induldge' every so often and even then it's as quick as possible to try and minimise the pain..

I hope this helps anyone else with the same queries..
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replied August 16th, 2011
suggestion
I have a diagnosis of lichen sclerosis, which has over time "melted" the labia minora into the walls of the vagina. It is not curable, but symptoms are controllable. I have a prescribed lotion that I apply twice a day when it acts up.
Just a suggestion.
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replied March 20th, 2007
Extremely eHealthy
I am really sorry to hear about your disability. It must be hard. I really couldnt' help you with this one only because i am not too sure how your girly bits could dissapear...i would advise you to take the appointment with the obgyn.

good luck to you dear...i wish you well.
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replied October 23rd, 2009
SPD/OTHER ISSUES POST DELIVERY
HIYA - I WAS LOOKING UP PAIN AS AN SPD SUFFERER POST DELVERY......IT CLEARED UP AFTER 10-12 WEEKS BUT NOW I'VE STARTED THE PILL AGAIN I'VE DEVELOPED HIP PAIN Sad I'M TAKING YASMIN, AS I'D READ ITS BEST FOR PMT/DEPRESSION/SIDE EFFECTS, AND HAVE ENDOMETRIOSIS BUT ITS NOT THAT KIND OF PAIN......ON MY 7 DAY BREAK THE HIP PAIN STOPS - I'M CONFUSED AS THOUGHT SPD RELATED PAIN WAS DUE TO PREGNANCY HORMONES AND ONCE NOT PREGNANT IT WOULD GRADUALLY GO - NOT RETURN TILL NEXT PREGNANCY OR HOPEFULLY EVER - BUT THIS CANNOT BE A COINCIDENCE????

I'VE ALSO NOTICED MY PRIVATE AREA REDUCING IN SIZE BUT BELIEVED IT WAS FROM ALL THE STICHES DOWN THERE AFTER THE VIOLENT EMERGENCY FORCEPS DELIVERY..I'VE IGNORED IT SOME WHAT AS BOTH BABY & ME HAVE BEEN SICK.......I'M WAITING TO SORT GYNAE APT....DID YOU SEE 1 RECENTLY AND ANY LUCK OR ADVICE OR INFORMATION?
ANNON, LONDON
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replied April 11th, 2010
diapearing clitoris.
Hi! I can sympathise with you on the disapearing clitoris as I have the same problem. My children are all grown up and I have a normal sex life although I had a break for two years recently when I split from my ex. My clit started to get smaller about three or four years ago although I cant be precise. My new man is bewildered that not only has my clit got smaller but my vaginal lips are like those of a much younger woman. Any useful advice would be welcome.
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replied November 20th, 2010
I have a disappearing labia minora. It's really scary for me. I went to the gyno specialist who told me I have lichen something and gave me cream, but my parts are quickly disappearing, so there is not much to put cream on. I know I need to go back to the specialist, his nurse told me I need to "use" it to get some circulation, but "it" is just about gone. What do Nun's do...I will not be using it anytime in the near future as I am going through a divorce, probably because I didn't like using it.

I am interested in finding out more information as to why and how this happens. It is not really painful as it is inconvienent since there is nothing to stream the urine when "going". Please help with any information.

Thank you and I wouldn't wish this on anyone! I gues the not knowing what it is is the scariest thing.
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replied February 16th, 2012
disappearing bits down there Wink
I have the same "problem". The clitoris is almost gone and my once rather big labia minora too. I happened to see Dr Oz show where there was a woman concerned about disappearing clitoris. Dr Oz said it was totally normal and suggested some hormonal cream. Im 50, so I guess my oestrogen level is not what it used to be. I also havent had sex since my husbands death 16 years ago. Im still able getting perfectly great orgasms while masturbating
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replied February 16th, 2012
Community Volunteer
Yes, it is because of menopause. Your hormone levels and genitals are basically returning to the prepubertal state. Everything 'deflate', becoming less plump, less elastic and thinner. And yes, hormone creams and hormone replacement therapy can somewhat help. But discuss this with your doctor first. There are also health risks associated with hormones.

Getting aroused and orgasming regularly will definitely help keeping you sexually healthy, so go for it. Use a water or silicone based personal lube if you get dry. There is absolutely no reason to not have sex or masturbate after menopause. Just know about the differences and that you need to be a bit more gentle, patient and make sure you are lubricated.

Best of luck!
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