Im sorry but im going to be straight and blunt......

You dont deserve your gf and if your cheating you really dont love her as much as you say you do! If you .R.E.A.L.L.Y loved her you wouldnt be cheating, plain and simple!

Your gf doesnt deserve the unnecessary hurt that you are putting on her and I hope she ends the relationship for good. Who knows, thats what you might need to wake up to yourself!

I just want to leave you with something to think about.......

Cheating solves nothing and .N.O.O.N.E wins!

aaaaamen sister melissa!

If she is the love of your life, you wouldn't cheat on her. You would cherish her and treat her like a queen, not put her at risk for sexually transmitted diseases.

If you continue to cheat you are going to lose this girl and probably end up alone or with someone who respects herself as little as you seem to respect women.

Sorry to be mean, but....

I agree with the ladies. I think there is no love involved and if there was you would not cheat on her. Maybe you just need time alone and do things single instead of been with some one and breaking their heart. You are very young and should think about whats going to happen 5 years from now...Staying single would be the right thing for you at this point. If you love her like you say then dont try to get back with her let her go and try not hurt any more girls becase Karma might come back and bite you in the butt and it might be that someone you will love so much that its going to hurt so much. And by the time you realize it, it's going to be to late. Good luck!

"If you loved her, you would not cheat". Please realize that beyond your own world there are others out there that may feel different. Speaking in absolutes is not productive here. I think he has heard this phrase before, so no one is really trying to help him here. I would say some people should get off their soap box.

When you start painting people with the same brush, and imposing your values upon other people, you start to discriminate. Everyone is different, and our situations are different. There is no general formula that can be applied to everyone all the time.

This young man posted here looking for help, and all he got was condemnation by you guys. Yes his actions were not the best, but why not try to give advice and help the guy before getting on a pedestal and jumping on the guy??

I would like to ask this young person, why they feel they have to cheat?? Why he cheated? Yes, you love this girl(who am I to say if you really love her or not), so why did he risk losing his GF over some one else??

Did you cheat because of the sex?? The attention from some one else?? The fact that it boosts your ego??? Your GF was not giving you what you wanted??? What exactly makes you cheat. Please try to think about it and post back here. Aside from getting burned to a steak, like many women who were accused of being witches were long long ago, some people will be civil to you here.

look around you.this whole world is full of opinion and discrimination.it is a free country so we can express out feelings toward something however we please.A cheater is a cheater.i'm sorry but no matter how bad my 'urges' are toward another man,I have never given in.no matter what problems I have had,I've tried to work them out.there is no reason for it and if he really did love her he wouldn't do it.How could you hurt someone you love so easily,feel bad about it btu go ahead and do it again? no love.

how do you know thats not what he needed to hear?this is a public forum and anyone posting about cheating knows they are going to get blasted by someone.its a chance you take on *anything* you post.everyone has an opinion and they stated it.no kind of cheating for any reason is acceptable.if you 'can't help but cheat',you should stay away from a relationship,simple as that.

And people here, like you, make cheating seem like it is equal to homicide.

He cheated, and you say he has no love for the girl. That may be true, but there is also a chance he did love her. You just cant make a sweeping comment like that.

Yes, of course he is going to get blasted, because that is what people like doing on these forums, when it comes to such matters. Instead of giving advice, people jump and make themselves feel good about themselves.

Actually it is a double standard. A woman posts about being too jealous, everyone here goes, "no, you were not too jealous". Yet when a guy posts here about cheating "you do not deserve her. you should stay away from relationshipis" is the kind of understanding he gets.

Both actions are wrong. I do not understand this selective acceptance of bad behaviour. But, what I do know is that before jumping on some one, and just blasting away with opinions that have little to no thought at all, one should think about that person's position or circumstances.

Opinions are one thing, but making blanket opionions and comments, and expecting them to apply to all is discrimintory. You can not paint everyone with the same brush, especially if it is a brush you use for yourself. Any one should be able to understand that.

so being jealous is equal to cheating on someone?

Im sorry but if you havent been in a situation where someone you love cheats on you, you have no idea how painful it is.

Id say break up with her and deal with your problems..if you continue to lie and cheat you will just hurt her more then you know possible.
i was cheated on and id of rather him hit me then cheat. it is the most painful thing a person can possibly do to someone.

Ok orig. poster, I'm very sorry for painting you with the same brush that I would paint other unfaithful people with. I certainly didn't try to make you feel bad. I suppose I was speaking for the girl, as I have been in relationships and have been cheated on, and I know how that feels. To a woman sexual relations are one way a couple can get close to eachother. It's very personal and special. It's hard to get past the fact that someone you love would want to be close like that with someone other than you.

Maybe you could look into some type of counseling. Maybe there is some deep rooted issue that makes you feel compelled to cheat on the girl you say is the love of your life. Maybe you are clinically addicted to sex. I think until you decide what you want and what you want out of a relationship you should be single, because from what you have said, you are acting it already.

makoto,we are speaking from our experiences.his circumstances are he said he 'loves' his girlfriend yet 'he can't stop cheating'.do you call that love?I certainly don't.I paint him witht hat brush because it fits.maybe he has self esteem problems and feels he needs attention from others or maybe he's a nympho.no matter the reason he is still a cheater.

I agree with the ladies above! I'm sorry but there is no excuse for cheating, no woman or man for that reason deserves to be cheated on! No matter the reason that the original poster cheated, its still cheating!!

You said that the original poster wanted advice, well i did give advise, I advised the gf to leave him and it may or may not give him the reality check that he needs!

As i said previously, i dont have much empathy to people that cheat. I've seen its devastating effects on people and families and i dont believe that anyone should have to go through it!

have you already talked to your gf about your situation..if you are in love in with her and she is with you then you two will need to understand eachother and try to work through your issues no matter how difficult the situation..right now she has probably lost all of her trust in you and her selfconfidence is shot..the one person who she loves so deaply has abandoned her..she valued your oppinion over all others..when you cheated it was like telling her that she is not the one for you...that there are other girls out there that are better for you than her..that would break her heart..and it was me i would never want to go back into a relationship like that..even i still loved the person.
but maybe if you could figure out with her why you cheated (maybe because you are still young and when other girls are sexual towards you..you may be very cerious what it would be like to be with them..when you find the right girl for you at such a young age it is very difficult not to be cerious on all the things that you may be missing out on) it sounds like the two of you have already split up
so i think that if she is still willing to be your friend and you can still stand by her..then maybe you two should see what it is like to date other people..and if you guys really love eachother..then in the future when you are more aware of what relationships are like you may get together again.
only then you will value the relationship a bit more.
that is just my advice...good luck