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Q: Questions?

asked by: Eyes Wide Shut on March 8th, 2007

Especially eHealthy

Soooo....I have a couple questions. This is one is for the mommies of older babas!

I want to get .Oni off of the bottle by her 1st birthday. (as does her Dr.)
We've *been* letting her drink from adult cups, so she knows the drill on how to sip from them.

I just don't know if *I'm* ready for her to be off of bottles. I mean, her night night bottle is a special one. Ya know? It's the only feeding where I hold her.

But then again, she's becoming a big girl, and I don't want my 2 year old walkin around biting on the nipple of a bottle filled with juice. That's not right, in my eyes.

How did you wean your baba's from the bottle? I've been giving her milk in a sippy cup for ages...so I just reduce the bottle to only at night, and then replace it with a cup in a week? Or 2?

The other question is this...

Since before I've been pregnant, I made it perfectly clear that my child *will not* suck her thumb, or eat fries.

Now, .baron's mother seems to have a problem with this. NOt just the thumb, but both.

When .oni was about 4 months, she started wanting to suck her thumb. I held firm and made sure to give her an orthodontic paci, before letting her suck her thumb.
Well we go to visit and I catch her in the act giggling at .oni sucking her thumb. And showing her how to suck it and putting it (.oni's thumb) in her mouth.
So when I busted her, I yelled at her for "not listening", and "I'm the mother, yada yada." She never did it again.

The other night, I went to his moms house to pick him and .oni up, since I was registering for the wedding with .katie.
So I walk in, and immedietly, .baron says "she just ate a fry."
I looked at her and asked her if it had been baked or fried and she said....fried!!!!

I went off. That was the breaking point for me. I'm soooo over her going behind my back and doing things that I specifically tell her not to do.
I feel like she thinks I'm too young to know what's best for .Oni, ANd because she has 4 boys, she knows all...
I yelled at her like she was a child, and totally expressed all of my feelings toward the situation.

What should I do? I mean, I've talked to her a million times about these things. And I know the fry idea would not have even been thought about if I was there. Like she did it in spite! Evil or Very Mad

I'm just soo aggravated with the whole mother in law ordeal.

My mom does things, like giving her coffee, and I yelled at her. I don't want .oni exposed to caffiene at all at such a young age. She understood, and apologized.
Peggy has *yet* to apologize...she just tries to justify her actions...

Sarah

Replies(27)

Emma2

replied on March 8th, 2007

Extremely eHealthy

ok this experience comes from my 3 yrs old nephew ....i dont see what the big deal with not letting her have her night bottle ..we stopped giving it to my nephew when he didnt want it and it was wayyyyy past 1yr old...it was a special bottle for him too...couldnt sleep without the bottle and warm milk...do what u feel u need to...your dr. cannot dictate what is best all the time..use ur judgement.

my mom did the saem thing to my son with letting him lick the coffee cup rim...what the heck is worng with these women!! i wonder what they did to us?!!

Eyes Wide Shut

replied on March 8th, 2007

Especially eHealthy

Emma2 wrote:

I feel like if I do that, I'm taking a risk of her wanting the bottle all day, over the cup. Ya know...like "ouf of sight, out of mind" type thing! lol!

I think it's all in my head, and she'll cope just a well without it as she did with it. If that makes any sense?

What about the mother in law from hell? No advice on that one?! lol!! Pleeease!

Sarah

Sandbox Party

replied on March 8th, 2007

Especially eHealthy

with jacob, we had him on sippys during the day, and a bahbah at night... then the night before his first birthday, we told him no more bahbahs after tonight. (we were weaning him from formula too.. over about 6 weeks starting at 1 ounce milk 7 ounces formula and so on and so forth and got it down to 6 ounces whole milk 2 ounces formula..)

Then the next day he was on strait whole milk and a leak-proof sippy at night.

As for the second question, its your baby, girl. tell them they will follow the rules you instill or they wont be able to be alone with her. plain and simple.

Eyes Wide Shut

replied on March 8th, 2007

Especially eHealthy

THanks girl!!!

I'm hoping she'll take well to the milk, but if not, I'll def mix the 2.

But with the in laws, it's not like she's crazy or anything. She's a very cool woman, who I've had many personal convo's with. I can talk to her better than I can talk to my mom.

I guess that's why I'm soo angry about it...because I feel like she should give me the respect that I deserve! I *let* her watch me push out her grandchild drug free. If that's not deserving of respect(from a mother in law), I don't know what is.

I mean, she knows how good of a mother I am, and I would think she'd just listen.

Sarah

Sandbox Party

replied on March 8th, 2007

Especially eHealthy

kids tend to prefer really cold milk to formula. Just remember to stick to whole milk its the best for them.

AS for mil... i can relate.. shirley and i used to be pretty close.. i'd tell her things i couldnt tell my mom. But we just get on each others nerves cuz we're so much alike in the attitude dept.

But she *is* still a mom.. and shes going to be no matter what. so she's still inclined to follow her own instincts... you gotta be firm and tell her otherwise.

Be like, *look, i know you have a certain way of doing things, and i appreciate that, you raised a good kid with them, but i do things differently and i'd like you to respect that.*

Mommy35

replied on March 8th, 2007

Extremely eHealthy

I would be very upset if my monster in law went against my wishes and gave my child something she knew I was adament she didn't have.

I thinks it's rude that she doesn't think you are old enough to know what is best for your daughter. It doesn't matter if you are 12 years old, the fact is that is .Y.O.U.R daughter and you have the right to raise her how you choose. Just because she raised 4 boys doesn't make her the expert.

I don't know you, but from what I read here you are a very very dedicated mother.

I would tell her as nicely as I could, "I don't want .Oni sucking her thumb", and give her specific reasons why you don't. "I don't want .Oni eating fries" and give her the reasons why. You shouldn't have to justify why you don't want her doing those things, but maybe she'll understand better that way.

Ask her how she would feel or felt when her monster in law disregarded her wishes, and let her know if it happens again, than you won't allow .Oni to go there unless you can be there to supervise.

Sunflower_pie81

replied on March 8th, 2007

Extremely eHealthy

rainfire1424 wrote:

As for the second question, its your baby, girl. tell them they will follow the rules you instill or they wont be able to be alone with her. plain and simple.

I agree 100%

and about the bottle...i am freaking out about the bottle thing. i have never once missed amelia's night time bottle, and i dont' want to give that time up. it's hard for me to think that she is growing up. it's crazy....ack!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but you knwo??? you got to do what you think is best for little .oni.

Idony

replied on March 8th, 2007

Extremely eHealthy

obviously this question wasnt directed at me, i know that but to me it sounds like the bottle time is just a special time, it doesnt really have all that much to do with the bottle itself

so what if you try to hold her at night and give her a sippy cup full of milk and still snuggle, maybe you could read her a story or soemthing while shes drinking?

just an idea, dont know if youve thought of it or not

and the other thing, thats messed up, not i think it would be different if she just thought of were having fries i dont think sarah would mind if she had one, but that deffinantly sounds like she does it just to piss you off, same with the thumb thing, that is just really not right, you dont try to force a kid to suck their thumb...i know you said she appologized but damn, whyd your mum give her coffee, thats insane!

~alicia~

Emma2

replied on March 8th, 2007

Extremely eHealthy

babymajic0506 wrote:

Emma2 wrote:

does she ask for the bottle all day as of now? i remember my nephew woul only take his bottle to bed..his dr. never said anything about it but it wasnt forumla ..it was homogenized milk.

Nataliachick7

replied on March 8th, 2007

Extremely eHealthy

im not letting Trace give up the bottle at one year. i think that is stupid. i dont trust that he will be getting enough nutrition from just meals at a year old. that is on two months! babies that are breastfed into toddlerhood get to have boobies whenever they want, and it is sometimes a comfort thing, so why cant a baby that is bottle fed also have that same thing? thats not fair.
i have spoken to a nutritionist about this, and she even agrees. she said pediatricians dont know a whole lot about babies nutritional needs, thats why she has the job of nutritionist.
also, if you dont want your baby sucking on a juice bottle at 2 years old, if you do give her juice, give it to her in a sippy. i would also not recommend putting baby to sleep with a bottle because of tooth decay.

Eyes Wide Shut

replied on March 8th, 2007

Especially eHealthy

Lol...my mom gave her coffee, becasue apparently "back in the day" they would mix coffee with milk...for the taste I guess?

With the mother in law, she is a very spiteful woman in some ways, and her look was of Shocked

when .baron blurted out that .oni had a frech fry.

I know I took her youngest son from her, but that's no reason to go against my wishes. lol!

The bottle thing, for *me*, it is a special bonding time for us. I've been feeding her in her high chair since she was 3/4 months old. The only time I *ever* hold her to feed her is at night.

I definately don't want her to stick with a "baby" night time routine, as opposed to a "big girl" routine. Ya know?

Reguardless of the situation, she'll still love me. Even if I don't hold her at night to feed her. I can still rock & sing to her if I want!

Thanks ladies!! I wish "talking" would get through to this woman. Cuz I have sat down with her and nonchallantly(sp?) told her my rules and reasonings...I guess she could care less.

Oh and *another* thing! She thought I was mad at her a while back, and instead of calling *me*, she calls .baron!!! I was *shocked*!! I mean, have enough dignity to call the person you're talking about. First.

When she finally called me the next morning, I said "ohh, I was hoping you'd call...after last night passed, I didn't think you would."

Sorry yall, she just drives me insane...and acts like she ain't did nothin wrong!

Sarah

Kia

replied on March 8th, 2007

Supporter

some times people have a hard time to understand stuff that is a big deal to us, when it isn't to them.

They think we're just over fussy or something and that "it won't hurt this once".

I have ocd and some things just have to be done in a certain way or not at all.
Steve understands this and deals with it. My dad doesn't and drives me insane - it really upsets me sometimes because to me those things are very important.

just like you with oni not thumbsucking or eating fries.
to her it doesn't make sense because it's not important but to you it is very important.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The night night bottle - my suggestions have already been said.
either keep the last bottle - it's a comfort thing/routine thing.
or give her it in a sippy but still have the together snuggling part of it -just not with an actual bottle.

Emma2

replied on March 8th, 2007

Extremely eHealthy

The night night bottle - my suggestions have already been said.
either keep the last bottle - it's a comfort thing/routine thing.
or give her it in a sippy but still have the together snuggling part of it -just not with an actual bottle.[/quote]

i agree with not worth it but one the flip side i would be too afraid he would get used to it and then think i would have to cuddle every nightnd would not fall asleep on his own...i dunno anymore!! Confused

Eyes Wide Shut

replied on March 8th, 2007

Especially eHealthy

Nataliachick7 wrote:

WHat do you mean by bottle...formula? Or just a bottle in general? I think a meal, with a sippy cup of milk should suffice for a 1 year old.
I got this thing in the mail offering "toddler formula" it was for babies 1 and older. Of course they want me to buy it, it's more money. Money that I don't have.

Oni doesn't drink juice. Or anything besides water. I don't feel that she needs extra sugar, aside from that in her foods. But that's just me.

My mom is a dental hygientist, so I've been big of teeth issues since I was 12. I've been brushing .oni's teeth since her 1st 2 sprouted. I do it twice daily.

I won't even let her go to bed with a water...laying flat and drinking *any* fluid can cause severe ear infections.

Thanks for the tips.

Sarah

mamaTT

replied on March 8th, 2007

Extremely eHealthy

So sorry to hear of your mother in law problems. Mine used to be the same way with my stepdaughter. We would specifically ask her not to let have this or have that, or do this or do that. Many occassions we found out that she was letting her do what we didn't want her doing. So, we stopped letting my stepdaughter go over there for awhile without one of us being there too. She finally realized that we didn't want her doing or having certain things for a reason, and though she didn't like it, she abided by our wishes...for a little while. After a few months, things started to go back to the way they were in the very beginning. We again had to stand our ground with her. We no longer have this problem now, as my mother in law got remarried and moved 9 hours away from us.

As for the nightime bottle, I don't see any harm with letting her continue to have it after a year. We took my stepdaughter's away when she was nearly 2 years old. One night we put her to bed without and she cried for it at first, but we told her she was a big girl now and big girls don't get bottles. After that, she was fine without having one.

Nataliachick7

replied on March 8th, 2007

Extremely eHealthy

babymajic0506 wrote:

Nataliachick7 wrote:

no i meant for me personally. Trace will continue to be on formula until at least 18 months until we do a whole milk trial.
he wont drink enough formula out of a sippy as he will out of a bottle, and i know that wont change much by 2 months, so he will still get bottles.
but i know some babies are more into the sippy than others. he *loves*regular cups, but he spills too much so i cant have that.

Eyes Wide Shut

replied on March 8th, 2007

Especially eHealthy

That's the thing, I don't want to risk her having an emotional bond with a bottle.

I see no problems with her using a sippy cup for formula, as she has for the longest.

It's just that her night time bottle is the only thing that qualifies her as a "baby"... Crying or Very sad

I've decided to finish this week/end with her bottle. Then turn it into her night night sippy. Same routine, different utensil in which to drink milk! lol!

Sarah

foxy

replied on March 8th, 2007

Experienced User

Tre was off the bottle completely by age one and was drinking out of the sippy cup. To ensure proper nutrition I made sure to make his cereal with formula.

But just replacing the bottle with a sippy cup in your night time routine should work out fine.

Sandbox Party

replied on March 8th, 2007

Especially eHealthy

Nataliachick7 wrote:

im not letting Trace give up the bottle at one year. i think that is stupid. i dont trust that he will be getting enough nutrition from just meals at a year old.

I dont think calling my choices stupid was called for, .Natalia.

A *lot* of kids are weaned off the bottle by age 1.

You like to read, google it.

Here i'll save you the trouble.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qi d=20060906120759AAwRcs1

Not enough nutrition.. lol

feed your child and you wont have a problem.

Ask your pediatrician about how many calories your child needs for their age/weight... and keep track. Its not that hard.

I mean especially if you're doing it for your child. Its worth the effort.

12 >>

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