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Im Ugly And Have Lost All Confidence

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Im 16 and in my final year of school , ive recently became aware of the fact that I am a very ugly person , I have misshapen ears and a very big nose and very pale skin , I have grear difficulty getting girl friends and I now get bullied from time to time about my appearance , but it has only started recently over the past few months , I am feeling very insecure and terrified , I always used to think I atleast looked normal but now I know that this is far from the truth , im scared for my future and of now , this makes me think that I am inferior to normal people and that they are all better then me because of their looks I need help finding happiness again some one sugest some thing Sad
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replied February 18th, 2007
Experienced User
Ugly In Appearance
You are not ugly. Ignore the bullying. You are better than that. Beauty or handsomeness is only skin deep. It is trully what is inside that counts. What kind of person you are, what your goals are, that is what should count. Don't believe what people tell you. You are a normal teenager, with normal feelings and aspirations. There is someone out there just for you, don't give up, you are still young yet. Have you talked to your parents or a counselor at school. Teenagers can be very cruel to one another. You are the way you are, and they are the way they are and you should just tell them to get over it and just grow up. Take care and remember you are just like everyone else, you just look a little different. Wink
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Users who thank san54 for this post: Fairy Godmother 

replied February 18th, 2007
I have talked to my parents a few times which has been hard since I usually dont talk to my parents about my problems , and I saw the school counciler . Both my parents and the counsiler say im fine but my parents see me the way they want to so they can be proud of their son and the counciler says all that just because its her job to make me cheer up. I used to look in the mirror and see myself as pretty much normal , but now all I can see is some sort of freak , and I keep taking photos of my self just to see if it will look better , I know it wont Sad its just theres nothing I can do.
Also I know that what the children do is simply because they are childish and need to grow up but the thing is they are making comments about things that are real and really are strange , the only differance between kids and adults is that adults are mature enough to know usually not to say anything , I have to go back for my final term of school tomorow since ive been on half term and im dreading it I feel so weak and my wil is gone I cant take any more of it , I hear people call me freak , say I look like a rat , big nose , elf (for my ears) and some times which is the most hurtful some times people just plain laugh at my face.
It makes me want to cry right there and then but I know that crying at school is out of the question since that provokes more bullying , I dont know what to do since this also means girls have no interest in me and I feel so dam inadiquate SadSadSad
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replied February 18th, 2007
Active User, very eHealthy
Look, beauty is not everything. Really. Not when beauty is equal to those stereotypes we see everyday.
So, you must have more confidence in you, ok? Smile
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replied February 18th, 2007
I want to have more confidence , but now every time I cheer myself up im brought back down again wen I confront a mirror , I know its pathetic to be so worried about looks since I know looks arent every thing but I get a stomach ache every time im forced to see my face im just conformist I geuss , I wanna look like every body else Sad
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replied February 19th, 2007
lol look at me being all silly , sorry for being a bother and wasting space on ur forum i know that every one has their own problems it isnt right for me to inflict mine on you sorry Sad
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replied February 20th, 2007
Active User, very eHealthy
Hey, you're not bothering anyone! If you were, there would be a lot more like you here, lol Wink But that's not the case, anyway!
Look outside and take a deep breath. It always helps!
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replied February 20th, 2007
i do lots of things to temporarly make me feel better but i am followed by my reflection and can not escape it im forced to see it arent i and i am angry and miserable at the same time because the way i see it why is it fair for me out of every one in my school to look as strange as i do Sad i feel suicidal atm
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replied February 20th, 2007
Experienced User
Everyones different in the world, your the only one in this world and thats pretty special itself. everyone has their own special qualities, you just have to find them and embrace them, and then you find happiness and confidence in your self. I remeber seeing that american idol winner on dr phil, he use to be bullied when he was younger for the way he looked, he never took notice of them and instead embraced what he was good at..singing, and look at him now!
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replied April 7th, 2009
Everytime i look in a mirror i see my hideous refletion my big spotty nose my long oblong face and i wish i could be anyone else but me. I have a group of friends they say im pretty when i ask so do my parents but they can't exactly tell me im hideous can they. All the pretty girls at school laugh at me behind my back and i can tell every time no guys go after me and they all laugh at my nose i will never meet anyone because theyll take one look at me and walk away. i want plastic surgery but i don't have the money and i don't like the idea of plastic surgery because of what everyone else will think. I don't have the confidense to do anything anymore and i felt that i just needed to write this down publicly so i could get it of my chest.
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replied April 7th, 2009
Supporter
Look at yourself. Take a good look, because all of you can't be ugly. What do you like about yourself? The heck with what anyone else thinks...SO you do not like your nose.....I bet you have nice legs? a great smile? what about your eyes? In order for you to feel better about yourself you are gonna have to do things to draw attention to the area you like. Opt for a different hair cut, get a free make over at a beauty counter in a dept store...you don't have to buy the products. Your self esteem is super low. GOd does not make junk.....you are going ot have to stand up for yourself. Only YOU can make YOU happy. If people do laugh at you behind your back then its THEIR IGNORANCE and their loss of having a good friend. The hell iwht these kind of people, you don't need them as friends in the first place!
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replied July 11th, 2009
mate im 16 and the exact same thing happened to me about a year ago i went from happy and content with myself to now hating my life and being envious of pretty much everyone i meet worst thing about it is my brother and sister are both really popular and good looking
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replied July 11th, 2009
so u look different? but your only 16 u have the rest of life to grow. ur still growing. boys dont stop until age 25 i believe it is.

but you in school do you get like decent grades?
or intelligant or theres something that they are jealous of you for otherwise they wouldnt pick on you.
BUT BE A MAN!!! after all most 16 year olds think they are so act like one. ignore them or fight back. you are letting them win. you let them get to you.

as for the ladies.... who honestly wants to date somebody their senior year. your going off to college or the opposite. just asking for a heart break. have fun play but be safe.
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replied July 31st, 2009
Hello dear
I've actually had the same problem..Always considered myself well, kind of beautiful, and here I go(at the age of 14 or so) and recorded a video and I almost got a heart attack when I saw it, and then the photos and all,"Hey it's not me! It can't be me!" It was so hard to get used to the idea that I actually looked like ThAT, while I had imagined myself completely different. Not that I didn't have mirror before, or I never took photos, it's just when you grow, well, some of us become less 'proportional' and Im not saying it just to comfort myself or anyone else, but some people DO look different on photos and videos than they look in life. You might take a photo and your jaw looked so not symetrical, but truely it might be no close to anything dramaticly not attractive or big sized like it looks on the shot. I'm not trying to get focused on only photos, but that's how it starts right? you notice here and there what "ugly" features you've got and then you totally get down, while there might not even be any real reason.
Quit thinking about yourself in a wrong way, cuz it's the WRONG way, trust me on this. Never look at yourself from somebody else's eyes, but stay in your body, FEEl yourself beautiful, inside and YES - outside too, cause all of you out there who says that it hacking doesn't matter, it does, and especially for ones who don't perseive themselves in a positive way. Try to grow your hair, it goes well with all the guys, and to me it makes people actually look better, exercise, try to get clothes that suit you most, and once again FEEl how beautiful you are, sit and think that you do not look ugly, you look normal, you look handsome! You, yourself go and think that first of all! Stop taking stupid photos of yourself, stop torturing yourself, stop making yourself believe that you are ugly. Some people do not look good on PHOTOS. Honestly, I am a girl, and I can fully assure you noone gives a damn about guys' ears, nor does it matter if nose is not straight or turned up, nose is such a tiny part anyone would take into account while judging appearance, and it's almost ridiculous that you complain about pale skin, cause I personally LOVE pale skinned people, and take my word, Im not in minority in this field. Smile All in all, you HAVE to work on yourself and how you see yourself, I whole heartedly wish you all the best, cause your problem had been close and familiar for me. And finally, when you boost a lil bit of your confidence, don't forget about the under skin part, which definitely IS the main part of human being and tomorrow or the day after tomorrow you'll undoubtfully realize it.
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replied August 3rd, 2009
Experienced User
Please consider this!!
Judging your peers without thinking is part of a teen's lifestyle.

I was made fun of for everything, especially my weight from the end of elementary until.. now! believe it or not.. and people won't change. I'm 20. People don't mature.

You can choose to listen to them or not. You can choose to feel good about yourself.

It isn't easy to change your mind about yourself, especially when you're around the same people that are making fun of you all day.

I noticed that once I changed my attitude, and didnt act like I thought I was ugly.. people stopped. You really just need to stick up for yourself.

Much luck!
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replied January 30th, 2012
1 Samuel 16:7…

Don’t judge by a man’s face or height… I don’t make decisions the way you do! Men judge by outward appearance but I look at a man’s thoughts and intentions
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