Hi, I hope you can take the time out to read this post as I am really affected by this problem. It is a long post, but I have tried to explain things from every angle so you can get a better insight, and hopefully that will help you to offer me any advice/help/ideas.

Im a healthy 19 year old student male. For the past 2 years, I have had a problem gaining and maintaining erections. If I masturbate or get with a girl, I can get a semi hard-on but no more than that. My penis however does become fully erect as I am about to ejaculate, but then quickly dies down afterwards. If I am masturbating however, and I keep myself at the point of almost ejaculating, I can keep a real erection, but only if I stay at that point. (which obviously is impossible for sex).

The weird thing about it, which confuses me is that it happens in stints. For example, over summer there was a two week period where I could maintain and get a full erection easily. And also, from early december to mid january it was working fine again. The reason this baffles me is that there is no particular lifestyle changes, use or no use in drugs/alcohol, mood change or anything of that kind. So to me, it seems really random whether it can or cant get an erection. Unfortunately, over the last two years, there has only been about eight weeks altogether where I can get and maintain a proper erection.

Needless to say, this is crushing me as it is ruining relationships. I have a healthy relationship at the moment with a girl who I feel completely sexually comfortable with, however I still cannot get a proper erection. I can get a semi erection which with some luck I can still get inside her, but it is just not ideal and does affect my enjoyment of sex.

I have seen the doctor about this a few times, my old doctor just told me its not unusual and that it will fix itself, which didnt really happen. My new doctor has referred me to a psychosexual clinic. However im not sure whether its a pyschological cause as the times when my erection has been ok I have been in the same state of mind as when my erection does not work.

One thing I think worth noting, is that this happened ever since I split up with my first girlfriend. We were together for three years, and although times were a bit rubbish for the last year it was my first love. I came to university and she finished things and cheated on me, it took me about 6 months to begin to get over her. I was crushed at the time, and I do still hold a grudge against her but I am over her now, as I saw her a few weeks back with her new boyfriend and it didnt bother me in the slightest. Im not sure if this could be related, the only reason I think it may be is because it is after we split up that my problem seemed to start.

Ive also done some research on the internet and noticed that this kind of problem can come from damage to nerve-endings throughout the body and problems with the spine. I do have lower back damage which annoys me on a daily basis but ive seen specialists about it who say its nothing to worry about.

Other health things to state are that I had gynecomastia when I was about 11, (gynecomastia is where the breast tissue on males grows abnormally). At my age this didnt really affect me too much, and I had the tissue removed. A possible cause for gynecomastia is gilberts syndrome, which I have also been diagnosed with. This is a condition that makes the liver produce too much bilirubin, but apparently has no other symptoms and is not something that affects health. The gynecomastia thing may be important as it is usually caused by an imbalance of hormones.

One last thing to point out is that during the periods that I am able to get and maintain an erection my libido is considerably higher, and I get erections often (i guess a usual amount for my age).

I am not worried about my penis size, and I am not scared of having sex. I sometimes get erections in the morning, but when I do it is not often (maybe 2 times a week) and they are not full strength erections.

I think I have covered everything that may be of any use.

This is ruining my sex life as I am a good looking lad and im a uni student, so I have opportunities with girls quite a lot of the time. I am in a relationship now, and I do not want it to hinder things any longer. I am totally confused as to what is causing this and obviously, I am really upset because I feel there is nothing I can do.

Can any one please help me in anyway?

Thanks so much for your time

alex