I am 19 years old and have been sexually active since I was 16, i've had a number of partners and I have done every single thing from every book and followed every advice anyone has given me including sex toys etc. However I have never been able to orgasm only by stimulating the clit.
Although I get horny and turned on I cannot reach orgasm through sex or cunnilingis. I currently have a boyfriend and we have tried everything and we have no more ideas.
Please help me.
Last edited by PuPPy on February 17th, 2004 11:31 AM; edited 1 time in total
Hey.I'm afraid I can't help you, just wanted to let you know your'e not alone. I'm 20, and I have the exact same problem! I have been with a few guys, but nothing helps. I enjoy the experience, get turned on and everything, but just can't cum. I succeed only by myself.
I've heard a lot of women have this problem. Hoping, like you, to finally find the solution. Good luck!
I finally did it! I found a way to orgasm during sex...I cant believe I figured it out only a few days after I posted the question for help.... It was kind of simple but very hard to make happen..And yes it was very psychological.
Well I am so happy for you! But it is true that some women simply cannot. It is just how they are put together. I for one, am one of those unlucky women. Well, not really, I can cum just not from penetration. But, yeah, let us know how you did it!
And for those who need some help in this area, I have heard(although it does not work for me) to stimulate your clit while having intercourse. But damnit, make him do it for you!
Puppy, i'm very happy for you can you plese tell the rest of us how did you discover what the problem was, and how did you solve it? And what do you mean by saying "it was very psychological?" i'm very curious...
Well I find that if u have oral sex first its easier to reach orgasm. Makes sure he turns u on completely b4 he has intercourse with u. The clit needs to b very sensitive or like plumped up. What u should do when ur ready to have sex is tell him exactly how to move and what to do while he's having sex wit u. Show him how to stimulate your clit while hes on top of u. Hey it works 4 me!!!
All my relationships have been ruined by sexual frustration but my current boyfriend still excites me after 4 years it's just when we start having sex I don't have an orgasm but still get some pleasure,i hope you can understand that.It's meant to get better when you hit your thirties and I am 31 so thats probably why i'm enjoying it a bit more.
One trick I learned many years ago, and I would like to thank the young man who suggested it! Is to go ahead and stimulate yourself while you are having intercourse. Some men actually find this quite erotic, others are just happy enough that you are getting somewhere.
Yeah, that does work, but in my opinion, and it is just my opinion, is that if I have to be stimulating myself, then who needs him!!! I make my man please me and then I please him. I have had enough of men who get off and don't worry about me! I make my man work for it!
I have tried everything and i cant even get myself off it almost happens and then the sensation just stops. I thought it was because i wasnt concentrating but, i have cleared my mind and still it stops right before. I am only 20 and i have heard some girls dont reach sexual maturity until thier twenties but, you would think if it was that case for me i wouldnt be able to get so close to the big moment. Please someone give me advice?
apparently its all about confidence, i was talking to my friend about it and she used too have the same problem, she told me to fake it and eventually your become confident enough to actually orgasm. hmm, i dunnoo if it actually works cus i havnt tried it yet, but still its worth trying
If you fake it your robbing yourself of true pleasure and lying to your partner.
More often than not women cannot orgasm from penetration alone. Clitoral stimulation is needed. You also need to get your mind into what your doing. It's ok to close your eyes and focus on what your feeling. Use your hand to stimulate yourself while he is penetrating. Have him do it for you. A good position is woman on top. When your on top you can control the pace and grind your clitoris on his pelvis or rock or brush against it or whatever stimulation you need to reach orgasm. I understand what the one poster means when she says if your doing it yourself then what do you need him for but try doing it yourself and take him out of the equation and see how unsatisfying that eventually becomes.
Many of the things that are outlined here a woman will not do...She is ashamed to be this bold in their love making...This sexual act that she is trying to learn is not pleasurable to start....She tolerates it as part of the relationship....IMO, until she can let loose and let the "hot babe" inside her loose she cannot find the magic that awaits a woman in sexual lust...This cannot be accomplished by just an "anyone"....It must be her lover who she has deep feelings for and she is willing to allow to invade her soul.....
I've read once that masturbating often,would make it impossible for a woman to recieve an orgasm naturally while being penetrated by the males' penis,you would have to assist while he's moving inside of you in order to reach your climax.
A woman's problem in masturbating too often by herself is that she, like a man, can find her "perfect spot" that can overwhelm her...It is so good and so sweet that it cannot be duplicated...When this happens lay off if you are going to have sex...Make yourself starve to death for your man...Make the want of penetration so desirable that you will do or be anything to him rather than have stimulated yourself that same day...Frequent set begets frequent sex, but there is a vast difference in masturbation sex and penetration sex....Don't mix them up...Always let man be the dominating force in your mind...He is the pleasure that you will seek in your declining years....The filling of man will be what your vagina desires....Not a finger or a toy.....
While I could imagine that to be the case- I was reading an article in Cosmopolitan magazine that was raving about the benefits of daily orgasms..studies were done on women who orgasm more frequently and they were, in general healthier than those who abstain from doing so...so the verdict is don't get off alone it ruins his chance? an orgasm a day keeps the doctor away according to cosmo! I should think they would have warned women not to do it themselves or it would screw their man's shot- hmm..
I have had this problem since I started having sex, I didn't even know how an orgasm felt until I was sexually active for 5 years even by myself, the only man who has gave me an orgasm is my husband and only if I'm on top, which is the friction of my clot and Yaa...but recently we have been exploring more and got a little bullet, just put that on your clit during any kind of sex but on top is best and you will orgasm much fast and stronger!!! any other tips cuz now I can't stop n want better orgasms