I will try to make this story short but so
that everyone understands my story.
Last year in march I met a 14 year old boy
named greg that was a friend of my
daughters. The moment I saw this child I
knew he resembled someone I had lost a
long time ago. Within days I became very
obsessed with this child and wanted this
child in my life. I had dreams that I was
his mom and that we did things together.
I just wanted to talk to him, hug him just
like I hug my daughter and do things with
him that all moms are doing with their
children. It became so extreme that I
checked on greg daily to make he was okay.
To make the matter worse I started a
friendship with his mom and explained what
the reason was of my closeness to her son.
She seemed to understand but I soon
learned that she actually pulled him away
from me. Instead of explaining to him
what had happend and tell him not to
worry, she told him all kinds of stories
that were so far fetched that even my
closes friends were upset about it.
I was so depressed after she took her son
away from me that I overdoses on ambien.
It was so hard for me to let greg go, but
I just didnt' have a choice. Greg
recently moved away and I feel like this
is all my fault. I did talk to his mom
for the last time before they left and she
assured me it had nothing to do with me
but because of a better job.
I feel like the closer I get to march
again, the more anxious I get. I miss
greg so terrible but it is just not
worthed to look for him. My heart hurts
because I not only lost one loved one but
two. Although greg is still alive I feel
like he died years ago.
I just wanted to tell you all this story
because it is amazing what the brain can
do to people. It makes you do things that
you never thought you would do.
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Color of Paper
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Jan 2007 Posts: 171 Location: Long Beach, Ca
Posted: 02-02-07 11:27am
Wow very interesting. Thank you for the
post, im sure it will help alot out with
missing a loved one.
The brain is werid and can force very odd
emotions on us but in the end we need to
be in control of our lifes.
Remeber march is only 31 days...That goes
by really fast if you keep busy* ^_^
Last edited by Color of Paper on 02-02-07 13:00pm; edited 1 time in total
Pardon my candor but what was the fixation
or obsession to this boy? Frankly if it
were my son and another mother told me how
much she loved him and check in on him all
the time, it would make me nervous as
well.
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nmulder33
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Jan 2007 Posts: 15 Location: Minnesota
Posted: 02-02-07 17:27pm
My heart hurts because I not only lost one
loved one but two.
Does this explain enough?? On the day I
met greg, I lost a loved one 20 years ago.
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Color of Paper
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Jan 2007 Posts: 171 Location: Long Beach, Ca
Posted: 02-02-07 17:53pm
When people say they have lost a loved one
I find it interesting that they forget
where this person is. No one knows what
happens after death, for all we know they
could be super happy somewhere living the
life they alwasy wanted.
For me reality is a pain. Emotions are
even harder to deal with...For all I know
when i'm dead all this will be figured out
by the big monster in the sky. Greg
isint your son, you may have a strong
emotional attachment for him but his
parrents are the ones that love him. He
is there blood, there life.
If you are just looking for something to
fill a spot in your heart...Remeber it
doesnt have to be the same you lost...It
can be something/someone completely new
and different.
Stay up and try not to stress yourself
over this. ^_^
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nmulder33
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Jan 2007 Posts: 15 Location: Minnesota
Posted: 02-02-07 19:55pm
Thank you so much for those wonderful
words. Yes, I guess you really explained
it well with saying it does not have to be
greg that fills the empty spot in my
heart. I have found after this whole
ordeal that my daughter is the one that is
important in my life. I still miss greg
but I try to focuse of what is mine and
that is my wonderful daughter. Sometimes
it just feels good to write about how I
feel and it helps if others can point me
out what reality is.
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Color of Paper
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Jan 2007 Posts: 171 Location: Long Beach, Ca
Posted: 02-02-07 20:59pm
Nmulder...This is awsome. I'm so glad
your able to sort things out...We all know
its hard. And forever fill free to shot
anything on these forums....We are all
here for u ^_^
