Welcome to ehealth- wildputycat!

Sorry to hear your news

i think it is good that you got him out of your life- if he was just making you worse..Then you need to cut out the bad news..And you did just that. It's going to feel weird at first, since you have been around no one but him for 9 years.

That is not good, to have someone make you change everything about you- cut you off from the world. That was wrong of him to do so. I am sure there is some type of support group in your local area- for the social phobia.. It will get better though and at least you recongize this! You can't stop living because he lives near you! You have so many things I am sure you missed out on, because of him.

Good that you are going to a counselor! That is a positive step- that will definity help you through this tough time i'll be your friend- pm me anytime- I know how you feel. I had two relationships that were horrid. At first, not so much.. Too perfect, you know? Then bamn...Strange thing is that I fell for the same type of "lying salesman". Very controlling, and verbally abusive. It's hard.. Because I do reflect, as I am sure you do- in the good times.. And do get lonely. It will get better, you are doing the right thing. Keep your head up, girl! I am here if you need me anytime

-=red=-

somehow I am managing as long I see my counselor regularly and take my medication every day. Some days are really hard though. I have two distant friends but we hardly ever talk to each other. I'm soo lonely. No one to watch movies with anymore or laugh with. What should I do now? I'm afraid to go out and explore. Any help would be appreciated. Sorry so long.[/quote]

Easy does it.

Just take it one day at a time. It sounds like you've got your faith, so know that things will work out. That's about all that you can do right now. Over time, things will improve.

Get out of the house when/if you can, meet new people at church, libraries, social events in your town, neighbors, old friends, family members, anyone and anywhere that you can feel comfortable and meet new people to make friends with. Avoid bars and things of that nature, you don't want the drama and self loathing that can come from that scene! Good luck!