Hi,
my name is bren and i'm 17 years old. Unforntunately I have attempted suicide. Actually i've done it twice. My first attempt was last january 2nd I hung myself in my storage room... It turned out to be pretty noisy so my mom came running. My parents decided it was best for me to go to a mental health hospital because I was already in counseling. I stayed there for two weeks and got sent home. Jan. 17th I overdosed on ambien. I ended up going back to that hospital (laurel oaks) through christmas. People wonder why... And it seems to be this big mystery... But the truth is my mother has been abusing me since I was 5. Not sexually but physicaly and mentally. I was so ashamed to tell anyone, I come from one of those... Everything is family information only families. I told someone in laurel oaks and had photographs taken of bruises and bite marks. But here I am a year later, and nothing has happened. I feel so lost. Im 17 and engaged, which im terrified of because I think I might be just looking for the affection I don't get elswhere... I feel like im about to slip again, and I don't know what to do. This is hell with no exit. I can't tell anyone else, they don't ever do anything and it just gets worse. Please help... I just need some advice. I need to know of some way out. Any way out... I hate the things she does and says to me, but I can't bring myself to do anything back... I mean we are about the same size but whenever she comes after me I go into the same mode I did when I was child, hit the fetal position and everything. I have no one to talk to and some advice would be great. I don't want to go the old route and let her drag me down, I want something new. Ways to cope? Something.