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Q: I Just Need Someone to Talk To...
asked by: alpal22 on January 6th, 2007
New User
I dont know , things havent been good for the past few years, like not good at all. I have thought about suicide to be honest, but I never could, its not about my family, its always like what would my friends think. Im 16 I shouldnt be dealing with this. I have amazing friends my problem is my family, my dad and his whole side of the family is out of the picture, this year my sweet 16 no one called me from that family or christmas, that sucks. I dont know, but then my mom. We used to be so close, like you have no idea, but then things have just changed, all she does is yell at me, call me fat pig becuase ive gained like 15 lbs . I used to be thin, but now im not. She tells me she hates me. Like that sucks so bad. And the reason im writing this is because she just yelled at me, and was calling me names. I just cantreally take it anymore. I have no one to talk to , im an only child and I dont want to involve my friends in these problems and when I go to my therapist my mom always goes and she makes me look like a lunatic becuase i'm the one with all the problems and everything's my fault. I just cant take it. Really. I try to ignore her.
But on top of it all , im failing like everything. I try but then my mom tells me how much of a failure I am so why should I keep trying. Theres no point in it. All my college letters she shreds because she says im not getting in. I just cant stand my life anymore.

Sorry, I just wasted everyone's time.
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littlesqueaks
replied on January 6th, 2007
Experienced User
Being a teenager is about the roughest time in a young womens life. Though it is not all girls but most have the hardest time with their moms during this time. It sounds though that your truely haveing a hard time with your mom. Do you keep your nose clean for the most part? (stay out of trouble, away from drugs, alchol, so on and so on) if you have close friends that you can "trust" your friends are the ones you will tend to lean on the most. As for your therapyst it does not sound like it is helpful much when your mother has to be there. My suggestion is to see about speaking to your school councelor with out your mother. They are free so you don't have to worry about the money. You can be open and honest with them about how your mother makes you feel. As for giving up don't give up finishing school is for you so that you can go on finish collage get that good paying job and move on with your life. Strengthen your shoulders and learn to let what your mom says to go in one ear and out the other. I am a mom as well and I hope to not make the same mistakes so listening to you and other youngsters will help me as my boys grow so if you want to pm me we can talk. I hope I have been of some help and remember you are an individual with good qualities just recongnize them for yourself and keep your chin up
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alpal22
replied on January 6th, 2007
New User
Yes it really is, and it just feels like compared to my friends im having the worst, but I also dont live with them 24/7. Yeah im having a really hard time. It just seems like she always has something to yell at me about. Yeah thats the thing, I dont do any of that. Im a good kid. I do , I have a best friend who is having trouble but she knows how to "control" it. She always is happy and knows that she can talk to me. Well I think im gonna continue seeing my therapist only becuase she knows my mom and can help me with her, and well my school counselor would not help. Haha.
But about finishing school, im def. Going to but its just hard keeping up the motivation with my mom shredding up college letters because she wants to be a b*tch. Sorry for that :/ I know what I want to do with my life. I want to be an accountant. Im good at that kind of stuff. I try to just rub it off and tell myself its just her mood or something, but when its continually being said its hard, its not that she's a bad mom, she really does provide me with everything, she pays for me to go to catholic school and lets me do stuff but if I dont do something right then she freaks out.

Well thank you for listening, it really helps. Good luck with your teenagers. Haha
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littlesqueaks
replied on January 6th, 2007
Experienced User
I have a while before my boys are teenagers (thank goodness) anyways why do you think your mom might tear up your college letters? Could she be affraid of you moving away? Being that you are an only child she could be affraid of you growing up and moving away. Not to get personal or anything but does your mom have it rough (financial, education, body, rough child hood herself) why I ask is sometimes others down talk others so that hopefully it makes the other person tough so that they will choose not to go in the same direction that they had. If that makes sense? Like someone that is over weight they will say something like "fat pig" to the skinny one so that they make themselves feel good and at the same time it could make the other person aware of gaining a few pounds so that they won't let that get out of hand and gain more. Have you been honest to your mother about how her words and actions hurt you and ask her why she does what she does? Well if you want keep in touch I don't mind talking. I do have a step daughter that is also 16 and she also has her days where her and her mom don't get along and she feels comfort in talking to me because I can help her understand why her mother may do what she does and it seems to help her.
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nemoblink
replied on January 8th, 2007
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Re: I Just Need Someone to Talk To...
alpal22 wrote:
i dont know , things havent been good for the past few years, like not good at all. I have thought about suicide to be honest, but I never could, its not about my family, its always like what would my friends think. Im 16 I shouldnt be dealing with this. I have amazing friends my problem is my family, my dad and his whole side of the family is out of the picture, this year my sweet 16 no one called me from that family or christmas, that sucks. I dont know, but then my mom. We used to be so close, like you have no idea, but then things have just changed, all she does is yell at me, call me fat pig becuase ive gained like 15 lbs . I used to be thin, but now im not. She tells me she hates me. Like that sucks so bad. And the reason im writing this is because she just yelled at me, and was calling me names. I just cantreally take it anymore. I have no one to talk to , im an only child and I dont want to involve my friends in these problems and when I go to my therapist my mom always goes and she makes me look like a lunatic becuase i'm the one with all the problems and everything's my fault. I just cant take it. Really. I try to ignore her.

But on top of it all , im failing like everything. I try but then my mom tells me how much of a failure I am so why should I keep trying. Theres no point in it. All my college letters she shreds because she says im not getting in. I just cant stand my life anymore.

Sorry, I just wasted everyone's time.


hi alpal22

i know I don't know you,but your story really touched me.I can understand were your coming from,but me it wasn't my mother but my dad,everything I did was never good enough for him,he was never happy even when I succeded.But you know what i'm seeing a therapist as well,and I don't know if she's told you about cognitive therapy,it's a therapy were they work on your self esteem,i'm working on that right now,because my dad,people at work ,and other people in life were always putting me down no matter what I did wether it was good or bad!And it just totally ruined my self esteem.You shouldn't let your mother put you down,and have you ever tried knowing why your relationship with her changed so drastically,maybe something is not going well with her either.I'm not taking sides,but everybody has problems,if their's one thing I can tell you is try to understand why your mother is acting this way and treating you like she is,i would have like to have done that with my father unfortunatly he passed away,and i'll never have the chance to ask him why all those years he always put me down!!And if you ever need someone to talked to i'm here!It may sound weird cuz I don't know you,but that's exactly the case I don,t know you so I won't judge you!And just to tell you ,you must be doing something right cuz your getting college letters which means your smart!!!Your lucky I haven't even finished high school!!!So that's it I won't keep you longer,but if it can help you can talk to me anytime:)

-nemoblink-
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tannerz_rja
replied on January 20th, 2007
New User
Hey I Know How You Feel Kinda...
My parents are so rediculious,i recently dyed my hair black and they start calling me gothic wich doing it drives me crazy becuase I tell them everytime im not gothic just becuase my hair is black. And the music I listen to.When ever I try to be open they just...Just shut me out I just try to ignore it but my grades have been taking a toll and they have lost total confidence in me having a successful future just becuase my first semester freshman report card.Its so lame how some parents can be, the pressure from my parents,peers,friends,teachers,school, and every little thing thats negative is making me so frusturated, that I feel lost and helpless in this world thats moving so fast around me.So your not alone my friend...Your not alone.
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