Thanks! Haha, up there is says ".A varicocele is an enlarged testicular vein." good to know.

I don't think i'm going to have her until friday morning, I think today their just going to put some gel on my cervix and make me stay over night in the hospital and then not actually start the rest of the process until friday morning.

I want to sleep lots, it's four am and I just woke up! I bought a ton of junk food (lots of chocolates cause I can't eat them when I start breastfeeding) and ate it and watched movies with a friend. I ment to spend the day cleaning and getting ready and such. Oh and by the way, i'm not even thinking about attempting this without pain medication anymore. Thinking about epidurals is what's keeping me sane, i'm so scared.

Awz goodluck tanya!!

Good luck darling. I'm sure you'll be fine. You're a strong woman!

Tanya, if anyone has the strength to go med free it's you.
You are a strong, strong woman and you know what you want and you get it.

Don't let fear cloud your experience.

You can do this, just keep a clear head and get what *you* want, don't let anyone tell you what you should want - do it your way.

I'm excited for you tanya! I know you'll be fine! Your determined and whether you do or don't use pain meds,you'll still have your daughter in your arms in the end!

I just sent you a pm wishing you good luck lol I was telling my husband about the "torpedo boobies" conversation last night

good luck sweetie! You'll do great

You're probably peeing your pants right now but I am so excited for you! Don't worry, you're going to do great! I can't wait to see her and find out her name! Good luck!!!

I like saying boobies too

I prefer knockers or jugs.

My mom thinks the "t" word sounds better. I hate that word...


G.O.O.D. L.U.C.K. T.A.N.Y.A!!!!!

Yay !!! I'm so excited too see her and find out her name!!! Good luck tanya!

Thank you for all the good lucks! I'm totally going to miss you all and then i'll feel overwhelmed by all the new posts that I can't catch up to when I get home. Reading all this has actually changed my mind and made me more sure I can at least try med free (thanks!... I'ld be really happy if I did it... Though I won't get down on myself if I can't). I don't have to be in until 2 (it's a bit past 9 am). I'm scared i'll get super bored at the hospital.

While i'm hurting and thinking I want drugs to make it better i'm going to think how absurd it is to even exist, in the past that has really helped with pain control with me, to sort of leave your body if that makes sense... Like give yourself that surreal "do I really exist" feeling, where you feel so separate from your body that whatever is happening to it isn't happening to you.

Do you guys ever do that, like look at your hands and think "whoa, this existing thing is so weird" I mean, if existing doesn't make sense, then pain doesn't?

I'm so nutty, and i'm sure it won't work, but oh well. I think I will take crime and punishment and reread it while i'm in the hospital.

Lol tanya! Just go as long as you can.Remember that the pain is not permanant and it *will* go away,you just have to have the baby first.Think of all of in this post too! you'll be great!