Hi there
i've posted before on the bi-polar forum here, but thought this one might be more appropriate. I was seeing someone with bi-polar and we broke up at the end of july. I went travelling for a month. When I came back we still kept seeing each other. Then at the end of october he tells me its clear to him that we are definitely just friends now. I felt confused because he kept contacting me and we'd meet and he'd be really sweet and affectionate (we didnt sleep together, although we did other things). Then we met up again and I said ok, let's be friends, but do it properly ie no cuddling etc. He says that'll be difficult because he still fancies me. I said that we should try. He calls me a few days later to go to the cinema. I go, we have a lovely evening and its clear he wants something more but I said I have to go home. I haven't seen him since. I asked him to meet for a coffee on a sunday by text, and he said to make it dinner. He then texts to cancel later. He sends me sweet texts when he is at his work xmas party (probably a bit drunk). He rang me to wish me a good xmas and new year and said we'll meet up soon. He just doesnt know what he wants and it's doing my head in. It's impossible to say how much is due to the bi-polar or what. The reason I am posting this here is because the long and the short of it, is he dosnt want to be with me. He has told me he is not in love with me. He has said he doesnt want to waste my time and that I should be with someone who wants something long term. I know I should just move on from this but I cant. I keep trying to find an explanation but I cant. I keep thinking what is wrong with me that he doesnt want to be with me. I know this sounds all quite pathetic and self pitying but I really want to move on and need some help to do it. This is the first time I think I have been in love and the first time that I have been vulnerable in front of any man. I am a virgin and really wanted to be with him because I cared for him a lot. We had difficulties with penetration and I know the reason is because I didnt feel he loved me and didnt want my first time to be like that. I'm afraid that I am not sexy because I am not experienced. This sounds so ridiculous and I hate to be feeling like this on new years day. I have to move on. Please help. Any words of advice would be great. My friends are getting fed up of me going on about this, and so am i.
Many thanks
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