Well i'm 18 years old now and I don't feel
like everyone else. I believe people
find me strange and yet they say there is
nothing wrong with me. I don't
understand
this as I know I talk really slow and odd.
I find it difficult to make eye contact
and I
seem to be in my own world most of the
time. I like to keep to myself, I love to
be
in a room alone behind my computer I don't
like sport or anything
like that. I seem to find nothing in
common with people at all. I prefer to be
around older
people rather than people my own age.
When I socialise with anyone outside of my
own home,
like I meet someone I don't know what to
say to them or how to keep the
conversation
going. I do not understand myself either.
As a child I was really strange, I would
walk
on my toes, stamp on old ladies feet. I
used to do mean things to my mother, i've
thrown
beer up her, spat at her, threatened to
kill myself (knives, jumping out of the
window).
I never used to have friends in school
either, i've always found socialising
very
difficult. Time seems to fly by everyday.
I wake up, sit behind my computer then
all
of a sudden it's time to sleep again.
Though I sleep really strange hours. I
even forget
to eat most days. This is a really big
problem, as I should now be ready to work
but I hate
the idea of work, I don't have any
interest in money yet I know it's worth in
todays world.
I can't for the life of me understand why
people are so stuck up and agressive,
maybe it's
just me I can't be sure. I feel like i'm
the only one that's right and noone else
is, yet
i feel anger when they don't seem to
understand what I mean. I say things to
people also
which may hurt them, but I don't seem to
realise that until afterwords, but then I
keep
quiet. I really don't know what's wrong
with me but surely this isn't adverage.
|
Spirit
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Mar 2006 Posts: 387 Location: Canada
Posted: 12-16-06 08:48am
At the risk of playing the amateur doc,
i'd say you sound possibly a little or as
they say mildly
autistic....................Maybe
aspergers?!...........Toe walking is one
of the signs, along with slow and slightly
mechanical type talk..................Lack
of eye contact is another and the major
one for aspergers in particular is the
severe lack of social
skills....................They seem to
have everything else.................The
intelligence and the verbal
skills......................But totally
clueless about social
skills...........They give the appearance
of not caring about others but deep down
care very much...............Just dont
know how to
proceed..........................I dont
want to label you or make you feel
defective........................You are
not and people should appreciate all the
beautiful differences we all
have......................................
Its just nice to know your not
alone.................And find support
from others in similar situations.
there are many websites with support for
peoples with autism/aspergers