i guess I just wanted to talk to someone. Last night my boyfriend of almost 3 year broke up with me and I feel devastated. I think about him all the time and I just feel so much pain right now. I love him so much and last night he told me he still loved me but that it just wasn't the same anymore, he thought it was time to let go. This past year has been really rocky for us, we've been on and off a lot but only a few days go by before we get back together. I blame all this on his insecurity, he doesn't trust me at all but i've never given him a reason not to trust me. He is very possessive of me, but it doesn't bother me because I have nothing to hide from him. I've told him this and i'm always complementing him, telling how much he means to me, how much I love him but still this isn't enough. Arguing in our relationship doesn't exist because instead of doing any arguing he will just break up with me for the dumbest reasons. And every time that happens I talk to him about it and we end up working things out. This time it's different though, he seemed like he had really made up his mind last night. I'm tired of trying and tired of hurting but I really don't want to loose him. I am so confused right now, I know I want to be with him but I don't know if maybe this time I should just let him be. No calls, no seeing him, no nothing, just giving him some space so that he figures out what he wants. Im just so afraid that if I do this, he will not come back. I keep hoping that if I give him this "space" he will realize that we are great together. We've talked about our future together and we both want it so bad but then the next minute he tells me that I would be better off without him, that I could do so much better, that I will meet someone great but I don't want anyone else, I love him, I choose him and I tell him this every time but he doesn't listen. Any advise/opinions, what do I do? How do I keep myself from not calling him? How do I help him get over this? Thanks!
Honestly it sounds like you need to let him go.If he really wanted to make it work,he would.I've been in a situation like that before and its no fun going back and forth all the time.You need to let it go and heal and then move on and find someone who wants to make it work with you.Or maybe it will take you *.N.O.T* going back to him to realize he lost you,then maybe he'll call you.For now lay low,don't call and dont see him.Gve yourself some time.
I agree, you need to let go. The worse thing you can do it keep going back, I was in a relationship like this for 4 year, always breaking up and getting back together, but the worse thing was I let it go on for so long, pretty much another 2 years of it. Then I finally realized that this isnt what I want, I deserved better. I was always blaming myself to everything that went wrong when it wasnt even my fault. You have to realize you dont deserve not to be trusted, I wasnt trusted and I didnt even do anything not to be trusted for. But he just didnt and it killed and when he would screw up I would still trust him. And you cant be in a relationship unless your trusted its just one of those things. Dont talk to him. Just let go of everything, and I know it will be hard, but you have to do it. Holding on and keep talking to him will make things worse. Go out with your friends, have a girls night something to keep your mind off it, even though it will work, once your alone again then it will hurt, do not sit in the house and mope around! Expecially when you know that hes out. Dont its the worse thing you can do! Go out have fun! Even if its hard to enjoy yourself you have to keep your mind off things because you will start thinking the worse like..Oh my god maybe hes with another girl why I am sitting here in pain! Believe me its the worse thing you can do. Its gonna hurt, believe me, you cant just stop feeling that way. But if he didnt trust you..You deserve better and I know that right now you think you dont, someday you will realize it.