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Womens Health > Sexual Health - Women Forum > After My Bf Orgasms.
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Q: After My Bf Orgasms.
asked by: Sprickles58 on November 28th, 2006
New User
Yesterday, my boyfriend told me that after he orgasms, he doesn't want to be touched or to touch me and sometimes he just wants to be alone and get away from anything sex-related. He said that, for about a minute or so after he pulls out of me, anything having to do with sex practically disgusts him, including my naked body. I feel like he called me disgusting. I'm already sensitive about my body and how I am sexually and this really hurt me. I still feel upset today and feel like my body disgusts him. Crying or Very sad I don't want to feel this way. I've been looking for anything on the net to tell me if this is normal and to help myself understand this. I know it's not his fault but it hurts. Do other guys feel this way? Why? Is there anything I can do or do I just have to let him roll away from me? I feel like i'm dirty or something when he moves away from me like that. I don't want this to bother me but it does. Please help!


Mods, is it ok if I post this in the guy section too because their opinion would help aswell.
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Kia
replied on November 28th, 2006
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Re: After My Bf Orgasms.
sprickles58 wrote:
he said that, for about a minute or so after he pulls out of me, anything having to do with sex practically disgusts him, including my naked body.
that sounds like he feels guilty about what he has done.
Quote:
i feel like he called me disgusting.
no, he could have phrased it better but at least he told you, it's him he feels guilty or disgusted with himself about sex. Sounds like it's a deep rooted psycho-sexual issue.

Quote:
mods, is it ok if I post this in the guy section too because their opinion would help aswell.
sure thing Wink
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sweetdreamer1912
replied on November 29th, 2006
Experienced User
I agree with the post above me.. But have you sat down and talk to him about how you really feel about the whole situation. I mean guys who are in a relationship with someone else and had sex with someone else .. Would feel guilty about that but to your situation.. I have never seen or hear a story like this before. I think you should sit down and talk to him and see whats really going on with him and why it digust him after sex.. I mean alot of guys should be proud of their girl and enjoy sex with a beauitful girl but instead of that .. That saying.. Ya know.. But talk to him and get more opinions
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teeny
replied on November 29th, 2006
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Actually, I used to do this to my old boyfriends. I would hate anything sexual afterwards and everything disgusted me--just like how you described him (except I wasn't as mean to say out loud that I didn't like to see my partner naked- that's pretty bad). It wasn't that I didnt physically like sex (bc I do) but it was something a lot deeper... You need to confront him about this because it is most likely something psychological he is dealing with. If you do not reach him then I would say that you guys aren't right for each other bc he's not completely comfortable around you with his emotions and he's not even omfortable with you and himself after sex. Maybe he doesn't completely understand why he's like that...But he needs to figure it out quick so you don't feel how he's making you feel and so he can hopefully not feel awful after sex. I hope this helps. Good luck.
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Kia
replied on November 29th, 2006
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Just to add if/when you decide to talk to him don't do it after/during sex - do it at a time when sex isn't an issue because otherwise you risk pushing him away.
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Stu
replied on November 29th, 2006
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Re: After My Bf Orgasms.
sprickles58 wrote:
yesterday, my boyfriend told me that after he orgasms, he doesn't want to be touched or to touch me and sometimes he just wants to be alone and get away from anything sex-related. He said that, for about a minute or so after he pulls out of me, anything having to do with sex practically disgusts him, including my naked body. I feel like he called me disgusting. I'm already sensitive about my body and how I am sexually and this really hurt me. I still feel upset today and feel like my body disgusts him. Crying or Very sad I don't want to feel this way. I've been looking for anything on the net to tell me if this is normal and to help myself understand this. I know it's not his fault but it hurts. Do other guys feel this way? Why? Is there anything I can do or do I just have to let him roll away from me? I feel like i'm dirty or something when he moves away from me like that. I don't want this to bother me but it does. Please help!


hi sprickles58,

it would be interesting to know some more about your relationship before offering my thoughts. How long have you guys been together? How much closeness do you share away from sexual situations? I mean, is he generally warm and loving towards you? Does he like to hug you, kiss you often, etc? And how attentive to your needs is he during sex? Does he spend time to make you feel good or is it all over fairly quickly?


I have some thoughts, as a guy, but I would like to know a little more just to be sure that what I am thinking is correct. If you can provide answers to my questions then I will reply with my thoughts.


Take care...
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EpicClerk
replied on February 6th, 2009
New User
Hormones
After you orgasm you release allot of hormones including Dopamine.
It is possible that that after orgasm he suffers from an abnormally low amount of these chemicals and takes a while (1 or 2 minutes) to reach normal levels again. This might be coupled with some psychological guilt he has about sex (very common in Christian;western culture)
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