Joined: 07 Oct 2005 Posts: 3173 Location: , Candyland-Canada
Thanks: 74
Thanked:104
Why Should People Stop Having Sex? Posted: 11-17-06 11:11am
Some you believe that if people stop
having non-procreational sex abortion will
stop well I have to disagree.
Some people who are married/relationship
choose not have children cause they know
they wouldnt be able to parent and if by
chance they do become pregnant they
abort.
In some instance as in mine, they refuse
to sterilize me because of my age even
though I have two children they think I
want more when I blatantly said I dont, I
have one of each and im happy.
Personally I cant deal with anymore
children, the ones I have keep me busy lol
and I had to find a form of birth control
that work where the possibility of
pregnany is almost non existant. In that
case im screwed because with sex pregnancy
is always a possibility, well since they
wouldnt sterilize me my husband got fixed
on his own free will because he has
decided two is enough! Even with my
husband fixed I can still get pregnant!
Thing is why should married couples stop
having sex because they dont want children
when marriage is a mixture of love, sex
and friendship?
Nowhere does it say married couples have
to children, if it did childbearing would
be forced and if you could not have
children would that mean imprisonnment??
What is your view?
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Carifairy
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Nov 2005 Posts: 2610 Location: Charlotte n.c.
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Posted: 11-17-06 14:18pm
I am happily married and childfree, I do
not ever want children.
|
msrosie
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Jan 2005 Posts: 360 Location: Ontario, Canada
Thanks: 4
Thanked:1
Re: Why Should People Stop Having Sex? Posted: 11-17-06 14:51pm
diamondsz
wrote:
since they wouldnt sterilize
me my husband got fixed on his own free
will because he has decided two is
enough!
this is out and out gender discrimination.
It is crazy that they will sterilize a
man but not his wife. You are in ontario,
right? Have you thought of going to the
human rights tribunal over this?
Quote:
thing is why
should married couples stop having sex
because they dont want children when
marriage is a mixture of love, sex and
friendship?
being married would not make me want
children. (fortunately, it seems to be
impossible now anyway for me to conceive,
since I appear to be in menopause)
besides, I don't think single ppl should
stop having sex just because they don't
want kids, either. I don't need a piece
of paper giving me permission to boink.
|
diamondsz
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Oct 2005 Posts: 3173 Location: , Candyland-Canada
Thanks: 74
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Re: Why Should People Stop Having Sex? Posted: 11-18-06 08:52am
msrosie
wrote:
diamondsz
wrote:
since they wouldnt sterilize
me my husband got fixed on his own free
will because he has decided two is
enough!
this is out and out gender discrimination.
It is crazy that they will sterilize a
man but not his wife. You are in
ontario, right? Have you thought of
going to the human rights tribunal over
this?
cant because the dr thinks im too young
and refuses to tie my tubes with a vag
birth, because of complication lol!! If
I got pregnant again I would have more
complication and they have suggested I
dont have anymore kids for my mental and
physical health but still wont tie my
tubes, .what is wrong with these people!
On another note
i also mentioned people in relationships
but since im married it is easier for me
to post from a person view (as in
marriage) when writing some of this.
Although im married I started off from a
relationship as all of us do!
|
Cambion
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 08 Nov 2005 Posts: 747
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Posted: 11-18-06 15:01pm
I hate how doctors no longer take women
seriously about sterilization. They won't
even take parents who say "enough!"
seriously, and it's almost sickening. I
don't think anyone should have to stop
having sex - if you want to abstain, then
that's your choice. However, I don't
believe anyone, marriage or not, should
have to constantly refuse sex just to
prevent having unwanted children. Adults
have the capacity to make their own
decisions and deal with the
consequences.
Not having 'recreational' sex won't stop
abortions. Women have the ability of
changing their minds about parenthood
during early pregnancy, their partners may
cheat or leave them, maybe they'll go
broke or the fetus will be diseased.
Abortions will never stop, and it's
foolish to think otherwise.
I also have never understood the whole
"marriage=kids" complex. The second two
people get married, they're getting asked
when the "miracles" will be arriving. Why
is it that so many people feel they need
to spawn to be considered normal or whole?
Why can't marriage be the two spouses?
Whatever happened to the saying "two's
company and three's a crowd"? I'm not
against people having kids in marriage -
trust me, i'd rather see a child born to a
couple in a solid relationship than to
some dirty welfare prostitute with nine
kids by different babydaddies. I just
don't understand why marriage is
considered complete to some people when a
child comes along.
Humans are strange - i'm glad I never was
one
|
sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Diamondsz Posted: 11-18-06 16:54pm
I bet you wish you would have had a tape
recorder with you when your dr said all of
that that he did not want to tie your
tubes because you are too young but he
does not want you to have anymore kids
because of your situation, sometimes these
dr's do not make sense, your husband could
have extra equipment and landing you
pregnant or something else happening and
you becoming pregnant, no you should have
the right to get your tubes tied and
burnt(just my opinion), any female should
as long as they are willing to sign the
paper saying that they will not sue the dr
for the procedure even if they decide to
want to get pregnant later(just my
opinion).
|
diamondsz
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Joined: 07 Oct 2005 Posts: 3173 Location: , Candyland-Canada
Thanks: 74
Thanked:104
Re: Diamondsz Posted: 11-19-06 11:19am
sandyallen
wrote:
i bet you wish you would
have had a tape recorder with you when
your dr said all of that that he did not
want to tie your tubes because you are too
young but he does not want you to have
anymore kids because of your situation,
sometimes these dr's do not make sense,
your husband could have extra equipment
and landing you pregnant or something else
happening and you becoming pregnant, no
you should have the right to get your
tubes tied and burnt(just my opinion), any
female should as long as they are willing
to sign the paper saying that they will
not sue the dr for the procedure even if
they decide to want to get pregnant
later(just my
opinion).
exactly, paperwork paperwork
paperwork!!!
Common sense people know that there can be
complications with any surgical procedure,
that just comes with that domain although
they are small.
As for having more kids adoptiont adoption
adoption!
Cambion I completely agree people are so
pushy, or if you have kids they always
seem to ask the same annoying question
(are you still with the father?) why do
you care? Sorry no offense!
|
sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 11-19-06 13:06pm
In our county alone the last count was
over 350 kids that needs to be adopted out
and the numbers are growing rapidly and we
live in a small county, how many of them
will find good homes with the love and
attention that they deserve?
|
justgottaloveit
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Nov 2006 Posts: 45
Re: Diamondsz Posted: 11-22-06 01:21am
sandyallen
wrote:
i bet you wish you would
have had a tape recorder with you when
your dr said all of that that he did not
want to tie your tubes because you are too
young but he does not want you to have
anymore kids because of your
situation
while I agree that a woman/man should be
able to decide for themselves whether
permanent birth control is for them, most
doctor's will not do it becuase of the
chance someone will change their mind in
the future. Long term birth control is
usually the more "moral" recommendation
for young, childfree people.
|
nightangel73
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Nov 2005 Posts: 2496 Location: ,
Thanks: 14
Thanked:10
Posted: 11-25-06 10:20am
Oh I can't wait to have many babies! I'm
planning my wedding!! Woohoo!!!
Ahh I just came from vacationing in the
caribbean. The beach was nice!!
|
msrosie
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Jan 2005 Posts: 360 Location: Ontario, Canada
Thanks: 4
Thanked:1
Posted: 11-25-06 13:21pm
nightangel73
wrote:
oh I can't wait to have many
babies! I'm planning my wedding!!
Woohoo!!!
if you want to be a breeding machine, that
is your choice. But not everyone wants to
be and that is our choice.
|
justgottaloveit
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Nov 2006 Posts: 45
Posted: 11-25-06 15:24pm
nightangel73
wrote:
i'm planning my
wedding!
too bad you forgot to get married before
sleeping around, huh?
|
jenn_smithson
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Nov 2004 Posts: 808 Location: Texas
Re: Diamondsz Posted: 11-27-06 18:21pm
justgottaloveit
wrote:
while I agree that a
woman/man should be able to decide for
themselves whether permanent birth control
is for them, most doctor's will not do it
becuase of the chance someone will change
their mind in the future. Long term
birth control is usually the more "moral"
recommendation for young, childfree
people.
but is this assumption
that people will change their minds equal?
No, it's not. My 19 year old brother
can go and get a vasectomy tomorrow with
only a minimal amount of people asking him
'are you sure?' but I couldn't get a
sterilization in this country until I
turned 35 or had already dropped some
kids. This to me is supremely unfair
and a disgusting practice of the entire
medical profession. As if women cannot
make up their minds about such an
important issue before they reach a
certain age but a young man who can't even
legally drink yet can easily decide it.
A good friend of mine has two children
both under the age of 3 and is 22 years
old. She didn't even want to have the
first one but she discovered that she is
quite fertile. After the first one was
born, she asked to have her tubes tied and
was denied at every private doctor she
tried. After the second one, she again
tried in vain. Finally, she located a
doctor in puerto rico, borrowed the money
from her parents, and obtained her
sterilization there.
To further illustrate how unfair that
situation really is, my husband's uncle
knew from the earliest stages that he did
not ever want children. So, at 20 when
his then girlfriend experienced a
pregnancy scare, he went ahead and
received a vasectomy. He had no
children, he wasn't old enough to drink
(by our standards, back in the day you
could drink at 1, he was still in
college and living at home with his
parents - but he could make that big
decision all by himself without anyone
second guessing him. My friend who is
buying her house, holds down two jobs, and
already has two children isn't yet in a
position in this country that she can make
such a big decision? b-ll
sh-t!!!!
it's plain and utter sexism at its worst.
The assumption that women are the more
emotional as opposed to the more logical
sex and therefore can't be trusted to make
such large decisions as whether they have
children or not. .B.U.-.L
.S.H.-.T!!!!!
|
nightangel73
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 Nov 2005 Posts: 2496 Location: ,
Thanks: 14
Thanked:10
Re: Diamondsz Posted: 11-27-06 19:29pm
jenn_smithson
wrote:
justgottaloveit
wrote:
while I agree that a
woman/man should be able to decide for
themselves whether permanent birth control
is for them, most doctor's will not do it
becuase of the chance someone will change
their mind in the future. Long term
birth control is usually the more "moral"
recommendation for young, childfree
people.
but is this assumption
that people will change their minds equal?
No, it's not. My 19 year old brother
can go and get a vasectomy tomorrow with
only a minimal amount of people asking him
'are you sure?' but I couldn't get a
sterilization in this country until I
turned 35 or had already dropped some
kids. This to me is supremely unfair
and a disgusting practice of the entire
medical profession. As if women cannot
make up their minds about such an
important issue before they reach a
certain age but a young man who can't even
legally drink yet can easily decide it.
A good friend of mine has two children
both under the age of 3 and is 22 years
old. She didn't even want to have the
first one but she discovered that she is
quite fertile. After the first one was
born, she asked to have her tubes tied and
was denied at every private doctor she
tried. After the second one, she again
tried in vain. Finally, she located a
doctor in puerto rico, borrowed the money
from her parents, and obtained her
sterilization there.
To further illustrate how unfair that
situation really is, my husband's uncle
knew from the earliest stages that he did
not ever want children. So, at 20 when
his then girlfriend experienced a
pregnancy scare, he went ahead and
received a vasectomy. He had no
children, he wasn't old enough to drink
(by our standards, back in the day you
could drink at 1, he was still in
college and living at home with his
parents - but he could make that big
decision all by himself without anyone
second guessing him. My friend who is
buying her house, holds down two jobs, and
already has two children isn't yet in a
position in this country that she can make
such a big decision? b-ll
sh-t!!!!
it's plain and utter sexism at its worst.
The assumption that women are the more
emotional as opposed to the more logical
sex and therefore can't be trusted to make
such large decisions as whether they have
children or not. .B.U.-.L
.S.H.-.T!!!!!
i agree with that. It is unfair for women
to be denied sterilization just because
they are young. I personally can't
understand how come a doctor is willing to
kill fetuses but is not willing to
sterilize for which is not killing anyone.
Jenn hasn't planned parenthood ever
discussed this issue and tried to do
something about it?
Even tho men have this advantage of
receiving sterelization at anytime they
wish they are still doomed for not being
able to have reproductive choices
(unplanned pregnancy) like the women have.
Did your friend never tried the iud?
That's pretty effective
|
justgottaloveit
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Nov 2006 Posts: 45
Re: Diamondsz Posted: 11-27-06 23:22pm
jenn_smithson
wrote:
my 19 year old brother can
go and get a vasectomy tomorrow with only
a minimal amount of people asking him 'are
you sure?'
i highly doubt that... I worked in the
field myself as well. The doctor
required the wife, numerous consults, etc
before doing a vasectomy. Even if he had
children.
jenn_smithson
wrote:
but I couldn't get a
sterilization in this country until I
turned 35 or had already dropped some
kids.
yes, that is correct.
Also remember that male sterilization are
less invasive and easier to reverse than a
woman's. Not that it should matter.
|
diamondsz
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 07 Oct 2005 Posts: 3173 Location: , Candyland-Canada
Thanks: 74
Thanked:104
Posted: 11-28-06 10:54am
Could you gals imagine though, what if drs
started sterilizing more woman, maybe
there would be less abortion, this could
benefit both sides!
|
jenn_smithson
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Nov 2004 Posts: 808 Location: Texas
Posted: 11-28-06 11:14am
diamondsz
wrote:
could you gals imagine
though, what if drs started sterilizing
more woman, maybe there would be less
abortion, this could benefit both
sides!
we've seen a growing
trend toward sterilization in certain
communities and where we've seen an
increase in the numbers of sterilization,
we've seen a decrease in the numbers of
abortions. The two do seem to be
correlated at some level.
There's also a strong correlation between
the economy and abortion. When the
economy is strong, abortion decreases.
When the economy weakens, we see dramatic
rises in abortion rates. And, in fact,
forgetting the housing market as an
economic indicator, we can watch certain
communities (unfortunately) that when they
start experiencing an increase in
abortions we know that the economy is
beginning a downturn or less productive
cycle.
|
Meandering Away
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 535
Re: Why Should People Stop Having Sex? Posted: 11-28-06 11:31am
diamondsz
wrote:
some you believe that if
people stop having non-procreational sex
abortion will stop well I have to
disagree.
Some people who are married/relationship
choose not have children cause they know
they wouldnt be able to parent and if by
chance they do become pregnant they
abort.
In some instance as in mine, they refuse
to sterilize me because of my age even
though I have two children they think I
want more when I blatantly said I dont, I
have one of each and im happy.
Personally I cant deal with anymore
children, the ones I have keep me busy lol
and I had to find a form of birth control
that work where the possibility of
pregnany is almost non existant. In
that case im screwed because with sex
pregnancy is always a possibility, well
since they wouldnt sterilize me my husband
got fixed on his own free will because he
has decided two is enough! Even with my
husband fixed I can still get pregnant!
Thing is why should married couples stop
having sex because they dont want children
when marriage is a mixture of love, sex
and friendship?
Nowhere does it say married couples have
to children, if it did childbearing would
be forced and if you could not have
children would that mean imprisonnment??
What is your
view?
ever hear of contraception hey.
|
Tylanas
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 13 Jul 2005 Posts: 12985
Thanks: 3
Thanked:0
Re: Why Should People Stop Having Sex? Posted: 11-28-06 12:44pm
cowboys
wrote:
diamondsz
wrote:
some you believe that if
people stop having non-procreational sex
abortion will stop well I have to
disagree.
Some people who are married/relationship
choose not have children cause they know
they wouldnt be able to parent and if by
chance they do become pregnant they
abort.
In some instance as in mine, they refuse
to sterilize me because of my age even
though I have two children they think I
want more when I blatantly said I dont, I
have one of each and im happy.
Personally I cant deal with anymore
children, the ones I have keep me busy lol
and I had to find a form of birth control
that work where the possibility of
pregnany is almost non existant. In
that case im screwed because with sex
pregnancy is always a possibility, well
since they wouldnt sterilize me my husband
got fixed on his own free will because he
has decided two is enough! Even with
my husband fixed I can still get
pregnant!
Thing is why should married couples stop
having sex because they dont want children
when marriage is a mixture of love, sex
and friendship?
Nowhere does it say married couples have
to children, if it did childbearing would
be forced and if you could not have
children would that mean imprisonnment??
What is your
view?
ever hear of contraception
hey.
ever heard of it failing hey.
Ever heard of women who can't use
horomones, who become pregnant even on the
iud, or are allergic to latex, hey.
|
Meandering Away
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jul 2005 Posts: 535
Re: Why Should People Stop Having Sex? Posted: 11-28-06 16:05pm
eiri
wrote:
cowboys
wrote:
diamondsz
wrote:
some you believe that if
people stop having non-procreational sex
abortion will stop well I have to
disagree.
Some people who are married/relationship
choose not have children cause they know
they wouldnt be able to parent and if by
chance they do become pregnant they
abort.
In some instance as in mine, they refuse
to sterilize me because of my age even
though I have two children they think I
want more when I blatantly said I dont, I
have one of each and im happy.
Personally I cant deal with anymore
children, the ones I have keep me busy lol
and I had to find a form of birth control
that work where the possibility of
pregnany is almost non existant. In
that case im screwed because with sex
pregnancy is always a possibility, well
since they wouldnt sterilize me my husband
got fixed on his own free will because he
has decided two is enough! Even with
my husband fixed I can still get
pregnant!
Thing is why should married couples stop
having sex because they dont want children
when marriage is a mixture of love, sex
and friendship?
Nowhere does it say married couples have
to children, if it did childbearing would
be forced and if you could not have
children would that mean imprisonnment??
What is your
view?
ever hear of contraception
hey.
ever heard of it failing hey.
Ever heard of women who can't use
horomones, who become pregnant even on the
iud, or are allergic to latex,
hey.
do you ever remember what you read or do
you just forget what pro life have
written, well it is not my fault you are
to dense to read properly but I am not
going to let you use me as an attack
board, then again a pro lifer being
attacked by pro choice, go figure.Why dont
you read her post she never once mentioned
contraception or any allergys, so go mod
your forum and leave me alone.
Ps imitation is the sincerest form of
flattery, merry xmas and may you live in
interesting times.
, he was still in
college and living at home with his
parents - but he could make that big
decision all by himself without anyone
second guessing him. My friend who is
buying her house, holds down two jobs, and
already has two children isn't yet in a
position in this country that she can make
such a big decision? 