Hey, I was doing well at college, 4 a levels, a gnvq and already completed 1 a level. However recently I have been missing quite a bit of college, i’m getting extremely anxious and find every day a struggle. I get so scared and worried over something so simple its ridicules. The college after time kicked me off of the 3 other a levels and allowed me to only do one due to poor attendance. Now i’m still having the same problems in getting too anxious and managing time badly to go into college. I was missing quite a few of the lessens.

I feel guilty constantly and a complete failure and I sometimes lie to my dad because he gets so upset. I don't think i’m stupid yet feel I can't even control myself. I have been having ideas that I sometimes believe, I do tend to fantasise a lot. I’m a bit screed I have skitsophrenia, or at least anxiety and depression. I have tried talking to the college councillor and it didn't help at all, talking about my problems doesn't seem to fix anything. I just feel tired all the time, I have somewhat socially neglected what few friends I have. I feel like every day is a war and even by the time the day starts I feel I have half lost.

I’m throwing college down the drain, well infect I have largely and I just feel so scared and anxious constantly. I did have a near death experience, a bad breakup, don’t get as much sleep ash I should, I play computer games to try to stop the feelings of guilt and of failure, I have not seen a gp but like I have said the college councillor. I am scared of death and feel content simply being alive however I feel I cannot control my fears and my time management is appalling. My work load is now extremely small, and I was not long ago working 10 hours a day 7 days a week. Any advice would be nice. I almost feel, like many people with disability are, that having the disability (schizophrenia possible) that my problems would justify my behaviour and poor performance, its harder when you don’t have an excuse, resign. Never the less even if this is so its still a cop out on my part.


I’m not sure what to do.