Eating Disorders Forum - Question For Former Anorexics

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Q: Question For Former Anorexics

asked by: bthomas on October 27th, 2006

New User

My best friend has had anorexia and bulimia for years. I haven't seen her in 5yrs or so and I wasn't aware of how she has deteriorated. She is finally "trying" to get healthy. She wants a baby. She is about 5ft6 and weighs about 90lbs. She admitted to me yesterday that she hasn't had a period in 6yrs (what??) and has recently had to stop driving because of the seizures she's experiencing.
My question is that, as her friend, how do I support her? What can I say or do that will help her on her road to recovery and how do I deal with the change in her since she is no longer the bold bright personality that I remembered her to be? And I don't want my two young daughters exposed to her eating disorder either.
Help me please.

Replies(5)

duffanie

replied on November 24th, 2006

New User

Be there for her if she needs to talk or just needs a friend. You feel very lonely discouraged and frustrated and its nice to just have a friend there to listen without preaching. She is having seizures and knows she hasnt had a period so she is aware of the bad things it is doing to her body and says she is trying to get better. So at this point, any preaching or talking about food or weight is not necessary. As her friend, just be there if she needs to talk or just needs a hug. And hang out with her and do something you both enjoy that doesn't involve food. Something fun....Movie, laser tag, play games, play sports.....Do whatever you both enjoy and something fun. Just be a positive encouraging role!

Catt101

replied on November 29th, 2006

Experienced User

All I can say is dont ever mention anything about how much she eats or how she looks, that could really hurt her, but yes not having your period is normal when you are going through anorexia, ive experienced it too but yah dont ever discourage her and be there, and try to be the good friend that doesnt say things like "i dont wanna hear about your problems" that did a number for me with my best friend...Even though you may not understand everything going on with her become her support, I can understand you dont want your daughters to be effected by that

Miso_cup_of_goodness

replied on June 26th, 2007

New User

Best thing would just to be there for her. Don't ever mention her food consumption or something related to it. That was one of the things I hated most when I think back to when I was anorexic, people telling me "you should eat" and blah blah blah.

Jess18

replied on June 27th, 2007

New User

Agreed. Just be there.
about the personality... just try to bring it back out in her. Do something fun.. something she enjoys. Just try to make her forget about all of her problems for the moment, and do something that will make her happy. =) Then you'll see that bright personality come back

model2go

replied on July 16th, 2007

New User

Yeee

you should be there for her through thick and thin.tell her you love her and want to help her and do not like to see er this way.offer to go with her to see a doctor and get her help.take her out to eat.as far as a baby.6 years.try birth control

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